This year’s birthday was one of the happiest Minnie has ever had.
Her father gave her a gift she had always dreamed of, a computer. It was Minnie’s dream to own a computer, and she never imagined that on her fourteenth birthday her dream would come true.
Although it was only a second-hand computer, it had already made Minnie’s heart flutter and her hands dance.
In fact, Minnie’s family environment is not rich, a family of three only rely on his father local disk workers to support the family, life can barely cope, but to buy a computer is very difficult.
Minnie is in her second year of secondary school this year. Almost all of her classmates have computers at home, and every day she hears them talk about how fun computers are and how they can make friends on the Internet, which makes Minnie envious.
Although she longed for a computer, Minnie never asked her father to buy one because she knew that computers were very expensive and she didn’t want to add to his stress.
However, in her daily conversation, Mandy unconsciously revealed her love for computers. Knowing her daughter’s dream, Mandy’s parents started to be as frugal as possible in their daily consumption and saved up money to buy computers for their only daughter.
After several months of “hard thrift”, the money saved up is not enough to buy a new computer, but it is possible to buy a second-hand computer for my daughter.
After getting a computer, Minnie’s life became very busy, she was busy borrowing computer software from her classmates and frequently asking about computer knowledge.
In order to access the Internet, Minnie emptied the stomach of her HELLO KITTY savings box, which had been with her for years, to pay for the Internet.
The first thing to do after surfing the Internet is of course to log into ICQ account, because it is one of the most popular things that students love to play, and it is also a way for students to communicate with each other and make friends.
In the process of logging in ICQ, the most mind-numbing Minnie is the choice of what name, and finally she gave up KITTY, POOH, COOKIS and other cartoon character names, chose the “pandas”, because she saw on the TV news in the Ocean Park’s two new guests, the appearance of lively and cute, so this cute animal! She chose “Giant Panda” because she saw two new guests in Ocean Park on the TV news.
During the summer vacation, fortunately, there is this “timely brain”, which can solve the hot summer long.
Minnie has been playing ICQ for only two days and has been deeply attracted to it. She sits on the computer screen and plays ICQ almost all day long, and her parents, seeing that it is summer vacation, are happy to have her playing computer at home, so even if Minnie plays it late into the night, they do not stop her.
It was twelve o’clock at night, Xiao Min was sitting in front of the computer, her hands were busy pressing the keyboard, happily chatting on the Internet. All her classmates were already OFF LINE, and Minnie was chatting with two online friends she had just met.
While talking happily, Minnie realized that she couldn’t transmit the message to the other side.
There was no message from the other side, so Minnie waited for a while and was about to turn off the computer and go to sleep when a familiar sound came from the computer, suggesting that there was a new message.
“Although she only played ICQ for a few days, Mandy knew that the other party got her information from “FINDRANDOM CHAT PARTNER” and took the initiative to find her for chatting.
“HI! Giant Panda, my name is Wen Wen, I’m bored, can you chat with me?”
“HI! Raven, hello, nice to talk to you, still up this late at night?”
“In a bad mood, can’t sleep!”
“What’s gotten you down?”
“Love.”
“Love! I’ve never appreciated it yet, I’m still young.”
“HOW OLD AU?”
“Not long after my birthday, 14, and you?”
“Seventeen, I met him when I was fifteen.”
“He’s your boyfriend?”
“Yes, he is a friend of my classmate’s brother, once my classmate invited me to sing at a karaoke and he was there, so we got to know each other.”
“oIc”
“Later, we exchanged phone numbers, and he often called to ask me to go out and play, and from time to time, he went to the door of my school to wait for me to finish school, and slowly I accepted his love.”
“How does it feel to be in a dating situation? I really want to know!”
“I think everyone feels differently, and myself it was sweet before it was bitter.”
“Ouch, first sweet and then bitter, first bitter and then sweet are not good ah, if you can eat like red bean paste, sweet all the way to the end, that would be the best.”
“Alas, things can’t be as they should be, it was very sweet in the early days of dating him, but then I gradually couldn’t tolerate one of his bad habits, and we quarreled a lot as a result.”
“What bad habits?”
“He has a lot of friends of the opposite sex around him, sometimes he goes out with them to sing and step on the ice and neglects me, and I’m often unhappy about it, and there have been times when I’ve had big fights with him about it, and he says that even if you’re dating, you should have your own space and have your own friends.”
“He has a point, too, but if I were in love with him, I think I’d be sour.”
“Yes, I was angry and heartbroken, and I thought that since I was your girlfriend, you should have spent more time with me and cared for me, but you were still spending more time having fun with them than with me, and so I retaliated.”
“Retaliation?”
“I pretended to accept another boy’s advances with the intention of deliberately pissing him off, when, in fact, I didn’t like that boy at all.”
“I guess that doesn’t seem like a very good way to retaliate!”
“I feel bad about it now, but at the time the thought didn’t cross my mind, all I could think about was you spending time with your friends of the opposite sex, and I had friends of the opposite sex to spend time with!”
“What happened then?”
“In order to be angry with him, I also deliberately and that boy hand in hand in front of his face, originally I want to see his angry look, who knows he just cold forlornly look at me, then as if nothing happened to leave, at that time my heart suddenly sank, I have a feeling that he will leave me, my heart is very beside the point, in fact, I still very much in love with him, I can’t lose him, I was sleepless all that night. Finally I made a decision.”
“What decision?”
“The next morning, I ran to his house to look for him, I knew that in the morning both his parents were at work and he was the only one at home, I told him I was sorry and begged him not to leave me, and in the end, I offered my body and had sex with him for the first time.”
“Y…”
“Does it seem bold and silly to me?”
“Yes… a little…”
“After having sex with him, I felt that I had given him my most precious thing, so he should pity me more and love me more, but I did not realize that he remained the same and did not change. One day, I went to his home to look for him to accompany me to buy a mobile phone, who knew that he said about an elementary school female classmates and do not accompany me, I instantly lost my temper and ran out, he did not even come after me. The more I thought about it, the angrier I got. He rejected me for a girl from elementary school, and after all I had done for him, he was so cruel to me. I hated him for his cruelty, and at that moment, a silly thought came into my mind, that I wanted him to regret for me for the rest of his life, and feel guilty for the rest of his life, and I impulsively made an action, and I destroyed my own… face.”
“Wen Wen sister, don’t be true ah ！！！！”
“It’s true! I regret it now, but it’s become a fact and can’t be changed, I have to go, we’ll talk about it another time, bye.”
“Shizuku-san, can I add you to my LIST?”
“Add it next time, I’ll be looking for you, BB”
“BYE BYE”
After saying goodbye to Wen, Minnie felt uneasy, feeling pity for this girl whom she had never met before. If what she had just said was true, how would Wen live in the years to come after she had destroyed her face?… The computer made a familiar sound again. Minnie glanced at the computer and saw that it was a message from two of her netizens whom she had lost contact with a while ago.
Both messages coincide with “I can’t send you a message.”
Mandy smiled and thought, “I can’t even send messages to them.”
Yawning, Mandy began to feel sleepy as she rubbed her tired eyes before disconnecting, shutting down, and going to sleep.
Life is business as usual, and Mandy still enjoys burning time on the computer.
Because the last time she chatted with Wen Wen late into the night, the sound from the computer harassed her father’s sleep time, Minnie’s mother told her, Minnie did not play ICQ late into the night, at most at 10:00 p.m. and then shut down the computer.
Mandy was eager to chat with Wen again, but she hadn’t logged in last time that Wen was within her LIST, she had to wait for Wen to initiate her, but Wen never reappeared.
It wasn’t until after twelve o’clock late one Saturday night that Mandy received a message from Wen passed to her.
“Sister Giant Panda, long time no see, how are you?”
“Shizuku-san, I’ve missed you so much, why haven’t you talked to me for so long?”
“I usually come up here late at night after twelve, but I don’t even see you there.”
“I’m sorry, my dad has to work and I can’t play on the computer until so late at night, but tonight is an exception, my parents have gone to Shenzhen to drink at a relative’s wedding reception and won’t be back until tomorrow.”
“Why don’t you go to Shenzhen with your parents?”
“It’s boring for miles, I still love to stay home and play on the computer.”
“I’ve been going to see him quietly for the past few days.”
“Your boyfriend?”
“Yes, ever since I ruined my… looks, the whole world has called him negative, and he is in a miserable situation, he is very disheveled.”
“I don’t think he would have wanted any of these unfortunate things to happen.”
“Yes, he was the passive one in this matter, I hid in a corner and peeped for a long time. He had lost weight and looked very forlorn, and I saw him take out the photograph we had taken together from time to time and gaze at it, with tears in the frames of his eyes, and I could not help crying out when I saw his emaciated appearance.”
“Shizuku-san, it looks like he loves you after all.”
“Yes, when I acted impulsively, the original intention was to make him feel guilty and regret, now that I see his guilty and regretful look, I don’t have a trace of joy, I was too childish, if you like someone, you should want him to be happy, hurting the other person is in fact very stupid, I am now very regretful, but it’s a pity that it’s already too late!”
“Shizuku-san, why don’t you come out and meet him? He still loves you ah, you can still be together.”
“The way I look now, I’ll scare him.”
“No, looks don’t matter at all as long as they truly love each other.”
“Sister Giant Panda, thank you for your concern, but many things cannot be undone, I came here this time to say goodbye to you, I hope my computer can make you happy, I have to go now, BYE BYE.”
“Your computer? Shizuku-san I don’t understand what it means ah?”
There was no response from the computer, so apparently Raven had left.
Minnie sat in her chair and stared blankly until the sound of a message came from her computer. It wasn’t a message from Wen, it was a message from her Internet friend, Little Fish, and she almost forgot! Xiao Min slapped her head, almost forgot, before Wen Wen appeared, she had been chatting with Little Fish, just too focused on chatting with Wen Wen and forgot about him.
“Does your computer have a virus ah? Every time after twelve o’clock can’t transmit messages to you ya.”
Mandy smiled and responded with a quick press of her hands to the keyboard.
“The latest virus, the twelve o’clock nap virus, the disease is over, come on, let’s continue, just now you said you also Jun over Dawn, did you brag.”
Forgetting about Shizuku, Mandy once again got into the fun of ICQ.
“Mandy, Mrs. Wong from the neighboring house has sent you many outdated magazines to read!” Minnie’s mom came back with more than twenty magazines.
“Hooray!” Mandy excitedly took the magazine and flipped through it.
Played ICQ almost a month or so, she gradually a little dull feeling, chatting every day, where there is so much to talk about.
Minnie flipped and flipped and her eyes were drawn to the cover of a magazine that was over two months old.
“The woman who sacrificed her life for her love and broke her heart in the XX building.
Negative, the new love is traveling together on XX Street.”
Xiao Min hurriedly opened the inner pages to check, not to see it, a look at the end of Xiao Min’s hands trembled, because the report of the dead woman’s name is Wen Wen.
Is it…
(concluded)
Appendix: A section of Shizuku’s diary
Sunset on June X, 1999
I didn’t sleep well last night, my mind was filled with Boonlong’s face, especially the way he looked at me without a care in the world, my heart twisted, Boonlong! Why are you so mean to me? How could you turn a blind eye to my companion? I’ve looked forward to seeing your jealous eyes…
Wen Long, do you know how much I love you? Do you know how sour and jealous my heart is every time you go out with your female classmates?
Wen Long, I don’t know what method I can use to keep you by my side, but I really don’t want to lose you, I think I can only use the last method to maintain this love.
Wen Long, you have always known that I value chastity, and in the past warm embraces, you have made several sexual advances to me, all of which I have rejected, and once you got very angry over these.
Although my head hurt a little, I ran to your house and gave you my virginity. Do you know that every time you thrust, you made me ache, and I felt slaughtered for the first time, and the pleasure of sex in novels is a lie!
My lower body burns and hurts like fire, and I have to hobble to walk, but seeing your contented look still makes it worth it to suffer so deeply for you.
Man Long, I’ve done so much for you, I hope you’ll have mercy on me…