spirit and desire


preamble

Life and death, honor and disgrace, love and hate, love and hatred, human life is so colorful and colorful, but also so short, like a different public dream butterfly, perhaps life is originally a dream.

In this short life, many people are constantly pursuing, pursuing what he loves. In the big world, many people, flowers bloom and fall, the tide rises and falls, how many moving, bizarre, gorgeous and poignant stories are taking place. Some say that mediocrity is true, but I hope there are unforgettable stories happening in my life.

If there is a fairy can reach my  hope, my first  hope is to live forever, only living can enjoy everything; the second  hope can have a lot of the most beautiful women. Maybe it’s cheesy to say so, but I think there are a lot of men who think the same as me.

I do not know from when onwards, the beginning of female sexual interest, the first time to make a girlfriend is at the age of eighteen, that part of the relationship is the most pure, we are together for three years, when she left me, I was really very sad.

At that time, I started to go dancing with my friends, and I continued to do so for four or five years. I wasn’t bad looking (I’m a bit boastful, but I’ll admit it), but I wasn’t very good with words (actually, I wasn’t very good at stalking), so I slept with about twenty women over the course of four or five years, and I was with them for longer or shorter periods of time. By the time I was twenty-five, I had another girlfriend, and about that time I was feeling a little tired and planning to settle down a bit, so I’ve been with her for three years now. By the time I was feeling a little weary, it was hard to turn back. It was so sad, I had lost my freedom.

I admit, I’m a bit of a pervert, or would not have written the article “Phoenix on Fire”, but this perverted psychology is hidden in the deepest part of the soul, no one can find. My profession is a teacher, to the surrounding female students, female colleagues I will never show frivolous, including contact with so many women, their evaluation of me is also “like a teacher”, but I know I am still a little abnormal.

From the bottom of my heart, I wished that I could really rape a woman, or build an underground palace like in the Japanese Nishimura Shouyuki novels, and capture the most beautiful women for me to rape. The craziest time, I even and a companion late at night on the path looking for the object of action, of course, because of cowardice, wandering a few nights and laughed it off.

Since rape has no guts and you lose your freedom, the only way to find excitement is to buy it with money, which is the most direct and convenient way.

I intend to write about my experiences and share them with you in the hope that my colleagues will respond. One other purpose of writing this article is that perhaps in 10 or 20 years I will be able to look at what I have written and perhaps have a little more recollection of the past.

The following are real people, real feelings (including dialog), and in no way false or exaggerated.

Chapter 1: First Time at the Beauty Salon

February 1, 2000, this year, Hangzhou days particularly cold, everyone is dressed tightly, like a penguin, in this cold night, I am a person alone in the street.

I heard from my friends that many beauty stores in Hangzhou have erotic services. In a year ago, a friend of mine Xiaoyu said to go to find some fun, I looked for the small horse (this person in this area to see a lot, in the future may appear his name), the small horse took us to his friend opened a beauty parlor, I do not know at that time because of psychological barriers, or no preferred, and as a result, did not go to do.

But now, a year later, I felt more bored with life, I was more desperate for excitement, and I became determined to have some fun.

The first time of anything is a little apprehensive, I am no exception, the road although the beauty hall quite a lot, but I do not dare to barge in, I do not think every home has this kind of service.

In the end I found Pony and asked him to accompany me. We first went to a store owned by his friend, but I didn’t realize it was closed. Xiao Ma said: “Now it’s the end of the year, the ladies have all gone back to their hometowns, of course there is no business.”

We started looking for another store.

We came to a store that looked like it was newly opened, pushed the door in, there were four women inside, a woman about thirty years old, like the boss’s wife, greeted us politely, sat down, and made tea for us.

Taking advantage of this effort, I took a look at a few ladies in the room, a short woman, from the side seems to look not bad, a woman on the side of the tall, but the appearance of the average, and the other woman attracted my attention. She has short hair, melon face, big eyes, long eyelashes, white skin, not very tall, about 1 meter 6 or so, wearing a short yellow trench coat and black pants, although I can’t see how her body shape is, but she is much better than the other two.

“That’s her!” I said in my mind.

Xiao Ma is very sophisticated already with the boss lady okay price, table fee 50 yuan, tip 100 yuan. This price is much cheaper than the previous two years, I did not realize that the price index is falling, the lady’s tip also with the market.

“Have you picked it out yet?” Pony asked me, really kind of like shopping in a supermarket, it felt weird.

“The one in yellow is better.” I said.

Not too many words, the girl in yellow (I never asked her name, even if I did, it was a code name, for convenience, short for “Siu Sin”, because I think it’s really very Sin) took me into the room.

The room is dark, only a dim lamp, a Simmons bed occupies 2 3 of the room, and a packet of toilet paper sits on the side nightstand, which is a necessity.

When I came, Xiao Ma told me, before the lady is not too  intention “water” (that is, snogging, I’m not too accustomed to the use of this kind of words), most of the hand or mouth to solve the problem, of course, with the hand and the mouth of the price is not the same, and now the store is more than one, the competition is also fierce, so the general miss are  intention to “fall into the water”, really the market economy is omnipresent.

Walking into the room, I was a little overwhelmed and nervous.

“You lie down on the bed.” Siu Sin spoke in Mandarin, her voice a little cold.

I complied and lay down on the bed, there was no air conditioning in the room and the owner’s wife brought a heater and placed it next to the bed.

She sat down on the edge of the bed, had me remove my outer clothing, and then in all seriousness began the massage.

“It’s my first time here and I don’t know anything.” I said honestly.

“Your first time here? I don’t believe it.” She obviously didn’t believe it.

“I really don’t lie.” I reiterated again.

“I’m new here too, and I don’t know anything.” She said.

“You always know a little more than I do.” Again, I don’t believe it.

“I just came from Wenzhou on the train this morning.” She said.

“You’re not going back for New Year’s?” I asked.

“Not going back, here for New Year’s.” She said.

“Then I’ll come to play with you sometime in the New Year.” So strange, why is my idea of finding a hooker to hang out with in the New Year so strange?

“Okay.” She said faintly.

After she tapped on my shoulder for a while, I started to press on a bit, not so much in lust as in the sense that it was redundant to spend my time drying out like that.

I slipped my hand through the hem of her yellow trench coat, she was wearing very little, a thin undershirt underneath. She frowned, like a little disgusted, but did not say anything, let my hands on her body. I kissed her on her white neck, wanting to make a “Kiss” with her, but she turned her head to avoid it. As if I heard who said, prostitutes are not too  intention to kiss with guests, I do not force her.

I turned my hand from her back to her breasts, which were plump and still felt very good in my hand even though they were through her underwear. She still maintained this somewhat cold expression.

My hand lifted up her underwear, and my cold hand went inside. Probably because of the cold, her body shivered.

“My hands are cold, aren’t they? It’ll be warm in a minute.” I felt a little embarrassed.

She smiled slightly and didn’t say anything, but I read a hint of helplessness and sadness on her face. As long as the woman is not born very lustful, every day by the old or young, beautiful or ugly, gentle or rough, phallus big or small men pressed on the body, so that the men’s reckless touch every part of the body, penis was inserted into the body one at a time, and sometimes have to use their mouths to suck and lick, or even by several men together to fuck, this life most women will not feel happy, I think around her I think she must be one of them.

I was tempted to ask her name, or even learn about her past, but I knew that was all redundant, she just treats you as one of the guests who came to have a good time, she won’t tell you the real thing, and maybe in her eyes it doesn’t matter what kind of man she fucks.

I inserted my hand from between the bra and gripped her plump, very elastic breasts, she wasn’t too old, estimated to be between twenty and twenty-two years old, not of this age where she was already nearly crippled, youth was written on her face as well as her body, her breasts were still relatively firm and there wasn’t a hint of flaccidity and sagging to the touch. Her breasts were round cup shaped with small nipples at the top, slightly larger than red beans to the touch, which was my favorite type.

She still did not move and let me touch, my hand undid the clasp of her bra behind her, she softly said: “Do not undo.” I did not pay attention, or her bra open, breasts off the restraints.

“Let’s be direct, do you use your hands, your mouth, or just do it?” My words were very direct, out to have fun, I didn’t feel the need to beat around the bush.

She was stunned for a moment and said, “I don’t know.”

Ha, do not know? The first time out of the brothel even encountered a only say do not know the person, I do not know what to do, think about it, I said: “then we do it.” In this kind of occasion, I speak the words are neither literary, say “make love” and so on, nor very rude, such as “snogging” and so on, just use this ambiguous words to express.

She didn’t make a sound either, and the whole time there was very little conversation between us and everything went on in silence.

I helped her remove her coat, and as she lay on her back, I cradled her head and neck with one hand, making a sassy move as I intended to slip my other hand inside.

“I’m going to warm my hands to myself first.” I said as I put my own hand into my underwear, it was really cold.

My hands were hot, it was time to start, I simply lifted up her dark gray underwear, her plump breasts were bare in front of me, I ran my hands over them, gently caressing her nipples, and then licking the tips of her nipples with my tongue, taking in her tiny nipples. Under my sucking, her nipples gradually got a little hard.

I pressed on top of her again and kissed her, she still tried to avoid it: “There’s lipstick on my mouth, it’s going to look bad later.”

“That’s okay, just put some on later.” I said. She didn’t hold back any longer and I slipped my tongue into her mouth and started sucking on her red lips as my hands started moving down from her breasts and in through the waist of her baggy pants, right up to her pussy.

Her pussy lips were small and my middle finger was slowly getting a little wet as I mooched it back and forth across the slit. My hands kept running over her hips and thighs.

“Let’s get started, I’ll help you take off your pants. Forget the clothes, don’t take them off, it’s too much trouble.” I felt like I had to hurry, even though my girlfriend had gone back home, she would call later.

In three tries, I took off my own pants, then helped her down with her panties. I pulled a dirty, whiny blanket from the side and covered both of them.

She still let me touch her in this motionless way, neither a little excited nor much displeased.

“Can you take the initiative?” I thought to myself: you’re a chicken, you can’t act like a virgin, what kind of innocence.

“How active?” She really looked like someone who had just come off the boat.

“Touch me.” I said.

“Touch where?” She asked again.

Oh, my God! How did I meet such a person. I just had to use my hand and put out her hand on the side of my cock.

It was at this point that her professionalism came out, she gently stroked my not yet thick and hard penis with her hand, looking very skillful, and in no time, my penis started to get hard and the lust in my heart started to get stronger.

I kept my hands roaming her body, but I didn’t feel like it aroused her sexually in the slightest, and she was still looking at me with her eyes wide open, not really sure what she was thinking.

Before my penis was completely hard, I pressed up and started the final attack, but I didn’t realize that I didn’t know whether it was due to nervousness or because I had just had sex once yesterday, but at the critical moment, after not stabbing in at once, my penis went soft.

I kept grinding my cock against her hole, but to no avail, and the indisputable thing actually went out at the critical moment (it’s been a problem before).

I seemed to read a hint of mockery and impatience in her eyes as I climbed off of her and said in relief, “I was probably too nervous.”

She didn’t say anything, her work ethic was top notch. I hugged her tightly, and the two of us started kissing deeply, and there was a book that said : kissing can promote sexual desire. As I kissed her, I gradually felt the need again.

By this time, my thoughts were confused to say the least, and I wasn’t paying much attention to her expression. I just wanted to get hard quickly so I could continue, and I started thinking about the plot of the book I wrote, Phoenix on Fire, which I often think about when I’m having sex with my girlfriend.

I let her hand touch my penis again, she wasn’t bad at it, she knew exactly when to go heavier, when to go lighter, and when to touch at the most sensitive parts again. With her efforts, my cock was finally harder than it had been a moment ago, I had the feeling of wanting to let off under her touch, and her pussy was already very wet.

It was probably about time, so once again I rode up, this time she used her hand to guide my penis into it, probably because her vagina was very tight, a few times there was a smooth insertion into the canal, and I started to worry again, luckily, after a few times finally my penis entered her. Her vagina already had a lot of water inside, very wet, but still considered relatively tight. Her legs were spread very wide, but still felt the vagina tight, and as soon as I penetrated I had the feeling that I wanted to leak.

I’m not usually like this, usually doing it for twenty minutes is a piece of cake, the longest I’ve ever done it with a woman was an hour and twenty minutes, but on this particular occasion I felt like I couldn’t really control it.

Prostitutes are the most popular and popular products; wives are specialized products; the looks of prostitutes are not necessarily better than those of wives at home; and it is easy to win the bidding if you don’t wear a condom in such a place, not to mention the fact that you will lose your reputation if you are caught by the police. There are so many unfavorable and dangerous factors, but why can’t I get aroused at home? And here, immediately feel aroused beyond belief? Anyone likes freshness, and this is the truth of the old saying “home flowers are not as fragrant as wildflowers”!

I adjusted the position, lifted up their clothes, so that her breasts tightly pressed against my chest, and then tried to restrain myself, and stood up the hard penis to pound her one by one, everyone did not make a sound, the room was only two people collision of flesh issued by the sound of the “fluttering”.

My feeling seems to her like my novel wrote Meng Fei Yun in order not to expose the identity of the black dragon to endure the rape, because she under me, the body did not have a little reaction, the expression did not have much change, let me insert the penis into the deepest part of her did not have a trace of moaning, not a trace of wriggling, and even more so the orgasm, is it no sexual desire?

Or… think of my girlfriend, whose screams were heard for miles even before her penis entered, and whose orgasm came in just three minutes after a week of no sex. In fact, I wanted to do more tricks, but I couldn’t even control it, let alone do other positions, so I had to grit my teeth and make the pleasure last a little longer, so that I could live up to the amount of money that I had paid for it.

When it was too much to hold back, I stopped, letting my thick penis stuffed in her tight vagina, and then twitching it from time to time, when my penis pressed tightly against her vagina and pried upward violently, although her body still did not respond, I saw her eyebrows move in a frown, was she enduring the pain, or was it enduring the sexual desires in her heart? I didn’t know.

“You’re so beautiful.” I said this to her when I stopped.

“What’s the use of being pretty.” She said faintly.

“It’s also life.” I wasn’t sure what I meant by that, or if she would understand.

After three words, there was silence again and I started pumping my cock again.

Really hard, when I continuously pounded a few times, I feel that my body is no longer under my control, I’m going to leak. At this time, my good nature once again manifested, I pulled out my penis, while saying: “I put it outside.” In fact, later thought, my worry is completely redundant, out to do this kind of work of women and how would not do a good job of contraception it? In the future, you can comfortably put it inside her. I used my hand to let my penis ejaculate, and a part of the semen was shot on her thighs.

Once she was done, she quickly got up and wiped the cum off her body with a napkin, which I noticed at this point was very well proportioned legs. I quickly got dressed as well.

“My friend just negotiated a price of $100 with the owner’s wife, but since this is the first time, I’ll give you $200.” I took out 200 yuan from my pocket and put it on the bed. Afterward, Pony called me a fool, and the $100 might as well have been good for him.

“Thanks.”

My pager rang, it was my girlfriend calling, I rushed to call back on my cell phone and made up a lie.

Afterword: “Spirit and Lust” is a personal biography of mine. It is a surreal work that describes the true feelings of the mind and desires of a young man who feels very hardworking and motivated. There may not be any ups and downs in this work, but it is very real.

After writing the first chapter, are you all curious to learn more about that woman’s past? Is it still wondering what kind of woman I’m aiming for next? I also want to know, but I don’t know, because this is not a story, you can decide the development of the plot, this is life, you can’t go to sway it. But making some useful efforts is possible, I plan to go again today, try not to let out in 5 minutes, try to play some more tricks, try to make this cold beauty can make a moan. If the cost is not too high, I also plan to take her out and find a place to have a good time, and it would be great to have some more SM (this is unlikely).

I hope that people who read my work and resonate with it will give me more responses, this is one of the main reasons that increase my motivation to write, if The Flaming Phoenix was posted without so many people giving me encouragement, I probably wouldn’t have published the second one. Writing is really hard, I spent a whole afternoon on this article.

Many of you would like to publish all of Phoenix of Fire, but why haven’t you posted it? On the one hand, I feel that some parts of the writing are not perfect and need to be revised, and the other reason is out of selfishness, if all of them are posted, then what will be posted later? The progress of writing is far from being able to keep up with everyone’s demands, I hope netizens will understand this point, but I am not going to do my best, and will not let the netizens who appreciate me forget me.

In order to better communicate with you all, I am going to apply for a free email address in the near future, so you can send me emails when the time comes.

I wonder if there are any female netizens? And happen to be in Hangzhou, intended to communicate with me? I think the chances are very low.

fantasize

Letter dated 3 February 2000 from the Chargé d’affaires a.i. of the Permanent Mission of

(to be continued)