This is a text I saw on the Silver Vase website and brought it in without saying hello; the original article does not credit the author.
A few days before a death row inmate is executed by firing squad, in addition to extra shifts, an inmate is usually required to accompany him, and on that day, I was called to accompany a death row inmate.
It was a young man under 20 years old, his bloodless face full of childishness. I was very surprised. Why was he so young…
He saw my doubts and said expressionlessly, “Didn’t you see the newspaper?” I suddenly remembered the rape and murder case published in the newspaper a few days ago, and couldn’t help but be shocked. I worked as an editor for the Re-education through Labor Newspaper, often helping correctional officers to organize all kinds of judgments, and was accustomed to all kinds of crimes, but I still couldn’t believe that the teenager in front of me was the murderer of that vicious case.
Last winter, the city’s People’s Park, a bizarre rape and murder murder, the victim was a young girl named Liu Yuanyuan, she was raped and killed in the park’s woods, the murderer poked her eyes blind, cut off her two breasts, a horrific sight.
Maybe he had something to tell me when he was dying, or maybe it didn’t matter if he was dying, he mumbled to me about his horrible life.
Do you know why I kill people? And kill the one I love. Even when she was dead, I wanted to save my beloved, whose breasts I had cut off, and it was out of love that I did it.
I killed a man. I’m on death row. But it wasn’t me who deserved to die, it was my father. I was the last person who should have come into this world. I’m a sinful son.
My father married my mother in 1976. Where I come from, as long as there is a matchmaker, a gift, and a wedding ceremony, it doesn’t matter if you get a marriage license or not. My mother was three years older than my father, and my father was not of legal age at the time, so I did not get a marriage license. After the wedding, my mother was pregnant with me, and the family was happy, hoping that she would give birth to a male child for the Li family.
As fate would have it, the college entrance examination was resumed in 1977, and my father was admitted to the university. After my father left, my mother gave birth to me. She wrote to my father, but he didn’t reply even a single word. During the Spring Festival, my father came back, he treated my mother very coldly, and did not stay in her room even for a day, and when he was leaving, he only glanced at me in my grandmother’s arms.
I met my father when I was eight years old. All these years, my mother had been serving my in-laws at home with all her hard work; I had always thought that I had a father in the provincial capital. When I met him, I realized that he had already married again in the provincial city and had a little sister.
He put us in a guest house and bought me a lot of good food. When he talked to my mother, I listened quietly, and I heard my mother crying, “I don’t care if I die or live my whole life, I’ve survived all these years. But the children are older, in the mountains, there is no school, you are so relieved?” Father said: “I know, think about it!”
My father did well in the city over the years and often sent money to my mother. A year later, my mother and I went to the city, where my mother worked for a small factory gluing paper boxes and I went to school.
I have not seen a smile on my mother’s face since I can remember. She loved me very much, all submissive, pampered and spoiled. I grew up to 8 years old, or mother holding pee; grow so big, not touching the mother’s breasts, I can not sleep, I was growing up with her nipples.
One day when I was 13 years old, I slept buried in my mother’s chest, and in my dream I had an unusual feeling that I had semen. My mother saw the semen and touched it with her hand with a very strange expression. In the evening, I touched her breasts again, and she held me very, very tightly, and in the midst of sleep I had sex with my mother. I know that what I did to my mother is not shameful, but my father abandoned her and created our monstrous family, is he not responsible?
Liu Yuanyuan was my classmate, and we fell in love in our sophomore year of high school. My mother didn’t like her at all, but I loved her very much. When she first came to our house, she asked me strangely, “You have one room and one bed, where does your mother sleep?” I said angrily, “Of course she sleeps on the bed, not on the floor?” Mother knew, quickly made a crib. She told me to sleep on my own from now on, and not to talk to others about certain things.
Growing up, I knew it was nasty and unseemly to do those things, but in the middle of the night, sometimes I just couldn’t help it.
On the day of the offense, Liu Yuan Yuan and I kissed in the park and we were both impulsive and had sex. I had only touched her breasts before, and she had better breasts than my mom’s, and I liked them a lot.
After finishing, Liu Yuanyuan suddenly cried, she said angrily that she was in pain, not comfortable at all. She kept crying, I did not know how to coax her, so I said: “Do not be nervous, it will be comfortable, my mom said, the first time is always like this.” Liu Yuanyuan said: “Why did your mom say such things to you? I have long felt that your family is not normal. You sleep with your mom, shame on you! Shame on you! Your mom is even more shameless! I’m going to tell my parents that you raped me, you’re a hooligan, and your mom is a hooligan too!”
Oh, my God! If she told anyone, even if I was fine, what would happen to my mother? I begged her, saying, “You didn’t see it. Don’t slander people.” She said, “I saw it. I saw it! Your mom is shameless! Shame on you! I went to your house the other day, and through the window, I saw you holding your mom…”
In a fit of rage, I took out the fruit knife I had with me and stabbed her in the eye; she tried to scream, but I grabbed her by the neck and strangled her. I wanted to walk away, but I couldn’t bear to part with those breasts, so I decided to take them away and treasure them. Later, remembering her cursing my mother, I mischievously took out the batteries from a small flashlight and shoved them into her vagina.
I love Liu Yuan Yuan, and I love her breasts the most. From now on, if my mother won’t let me touch them, I’ll sleep with them…
A sickly smile crossed the death row inmate’s pale face.