Convincing Li Li to give an interview was not an easy task, and her concerns were justified. She was a university teacher with a stable life and high social status, and it wasn’t quite right for something like a one-night stand to happen to her, as Li Li herself felt.
Li Li’s husband, Chen Dong, was abroad on another business trip, and the interview took place at her home.
It was a very large three-bedroom apartment, and almost all the walls were filled with bookshelves, mostly specialized books on art. Li Li taught contemporary art at the university and was a young female painter, her home was rightfully filled with art.
On the wall of Lilly’s study was a huge oil painting, which appeared to be a bit lonely, with only a large tree and a bird perched on a branch, its wings half-open, not knowing if it had just landed or was preparing to take off.
Li Li stared for a moment smiling slightly, “It’s a piece of artwork he gave me, his wedding gift to me, and a testament to my relationship with him I guess, I don’t know what the heck that counts for.”
Li Li’s expression was always so serene, no matter when she was smiling, contemplating, or clustering her eyebrows, what the people sitting in front of her felt was calm, and she gave people the feeling of freshness and coolness just like the brooks that flowed around the high mountains in the small mountain villages.
“He is a Chinese American, an art-loving businessman, and the hero of Li Li’s story. When I met him, there was exactly one month before Li Li’s wedding. In Li Li’s words, perhaps it was destined by God that an episode would occur between their marriages.
“My husband and I went to high school and college together, we’ve been in a relationship since we were in high school, he’s the kind of man who is especially down to earth that fills you with trust right away, he didn’t want to go to the college we went to later on, his ambition was to be a pilot, it was totally for me that he chose that school for business which he didn’t really like. “
Li Li’s words are full of gratitude to her husband, she went on to say: “I belong to the kind of people who are especially not able to take care of themselves, from high school we two good on the beginning, it is he has been taking care of my life, so I have not been able to cook, can not do the laundry until now. The Spring Festival before we got married, he went to my home, my mother took his hand, and said to him ‘Chen Dong you married her really suffer, she can not do anything, from the past you have been taking care of her, married you still have to take care of her, you have to take care of her all her life, it’s too difficult’, said my mother cried, but he said very simple, he said ‘it’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right’, he said ‘it’s all right, it’s all right, it’s all right’. said ‘it’s okay, it’s all I’m willing to do’ …… He’s just such a nice guy, so nice that it doesn’t seem real to you.” Talking about her husband, Li Li’s face naturally overflowed with a satisfied smile, the photos taken during their travels are in the frame on one side of the bookshelf, Chen Dong is a man with fair skin, his eyes are full of wisdom, at the foot of the Jade Dragon Snow Mountain, Li Li smiled on his back and cracked up.
Li Li and Chen Dong had been in a relationship for ten years before they had plans to get married, and she and the Chinese American had a one-night stand on their third meeting.
One fall two years ago, on the first day of the exhibition of Li Li’s art works at the 798 Gallery, Li Li was accompanying a few other painters to see the exhibition when she heard someone calling her and walked over.
An old friend stood at the door with a “very different” man. “Different” was Li Li’s first impression of the man. She couldn’t tell what was so different about him, but the man stood there, his clothes, his expression were all different from other men.
Her friend introduced her, “This is Deng Weida, who lives in the United States all the time, also studied art, and is now a businessman.”
Deng Weida is not tall, although he has already passed the age of no confusion but the vitality radiating from him is by no means inferior to that of a young man in his twenties. His lips were very
Sexy, with a rosy glow and a smile with two dimples.
Lilly was instantly enamored with his smile, which was also “very different”.
“Hello.” He extended his hand to Lilly, turned to his friend with a smile, and asked, “Are all the women painters in this country so elegant?”
For a moment, Li Li surprisingly did not know what to say, their handshake for a long time, that moment Li Li became rushed, inexplicably produced an affectionate good feeling towards Deng Weida.
Li Li showed them around the exhibition, because there were a lot of people coming and she had to greet other friends, so her first meeting with Deng Weida was almost no conversation and seemed so rushed.
Three months later, Li Li met Deng Weida in the elevator of a restaurant. This chance encounter without any sign made both of them feel a little surprise in their hearts. After finishing their respective meals, Deng Weida asked Li Li to meet him at a café near the embassy for a chat.
“The other day he told me a lot of his story, he and his wife from kindergarten on together as neighbors, after graduating from college they naturally got married, the next year there was a son, the child is less than a year old, he was admitted to the United States Princeton University, and so a person to go over there to study, he was in the United States to go to school for a few years in the poor can’t be poor again, on the point of the Scholarships, in addition to the burden of their own lives but also to the domestic wife to send over some, but also to save some money, he half a year only to the home to make a phone call, his son was three years old that year he finally did his wife to the United States, but found that she to the United States the first day of the night to the country to make a phone call for more than two hours, it turned out that she has had an affair.” Li Li is a kind person, which can be glimpsed in the slightly saddened look in her eyes as she recounts the story of this person who had become irrelevant to her. “From that time on they began a life of separation, separated for more than ten years, never divorced because his wife did not have a green card. His eyes were full of sadness as he spoke of these past events, and his voice was so beautiful, like that very faint and distant voice coming from the radio, that my motherly nature seemed to be aroused at once, and I had that impulse to hold him tightly.”
For Li Li, someone who had never been taken care of or protected, this feeling was something she had never experienced before. It was something that had not appeared in the ten years she had been with Chen Dong.
Chen Dong gave Li Li too much touching and too much care, but let gave Li Li too much tedium.
After leaving the cafe Li Li stayed awake almost the whole night, tossing and turning, recalling the details of her conversation with Deng Weida, recalling Deng Weida’s eyes, recalling his smile, his small inadvertent gestures, Li Li knew that she had fallen in love with this man.
At that time, Chen Dong had already bought the current house, he and Li Li moved in together, but each sleeps in a different room. On the one hand, because Chen Dong is too busy, do not want to affect Li Li’s rest, and on the other hand, because Chen Dong is too busy to make himself always feel tired, he wants to try to avoid physical contact with Li Li, in Li Li’s words, Chen Dong is to maintain the physical strength to go out to earn money.
Between meeting Deng Weida Li Li didn’t think there was anything wrong with her living like this with Chen Dong, and after comparing herself to Deng Weida, Li Li was filled with despair about Chen Dong’s future life for her.
“Now that I look back and think about it again, I feel ridiculous, but it was that instant that I loathed Chen Dong and felt that living my life with someone like that was worse than dying.”
For a long time, Li Li regarded Deng Weida as an ideal lover and companion.
The third time she met Deng Weida was the night a month before her wedding to Chen Dong, when Deng Weida invited Li Li to accompany her to the Workers’ Stadium to watch a soccer game. When Li Li arrived, Deng Weida had already waited for a long time, and when he saw the sweaty Li Li, he examined her for a while and then actually covered his stomach and laughed out loud, but only because Li Li forgot to wipe off the paint on her face when she ran out of the studio.
“Bummer! What’s so funny about this!” Li Li shouted at Teng Weida while pretending to be angry as she wiped it, but in fact her heart was filled with delight at that one.
“As if that wasn’t funny enough, you came halfway across Beijing with oil paint on your face, and everyone who saw you probably thought it was the most popular colorful costume of the year.”
“Nasty!” Li Li gave him a blank look and entered the stadium hand in hand with him.
Li Li said there is one thing she has always felt strange, is every time she and Deng Weida in a piece of want to take care of him, in the stands, he just want to do down, was Li Li a grabbed up, for him to wipe clean the chair before letting him sit, the ball game has begun, Li Li suddenly thought of all did not buy water, and ran out to buy water for him to see him hissing and roaring out of the head full of sweat, Li Li can not help but pull out the paper towels to give him a wipe! ……
That day, coming out of the Workers’ Complex, Li Li followed Deng Weida back to the hotel where he was staying, and so there was her only betrayal of Chen Dong.
At this point in the conversation, Li Li suddenly got up from the sofa to get a glass of water, and after sitting back down again, she was silent for a long time. Perhaps it reminded her of the episode, and she was once again caught up in conflicting emotions.
She opened the CD, the air filled with Wang Fei’s lazy voice: has a gorgeous appearance and brilliant lights, I am a carousel horse in heaven, just to meet the child’s dream, climb on my back to take you to soar ……
“In fact, I’m a person who isn’t that eager for sex, I think there’s also a reason for Chen Dong, he believes that a man’s responsibility is to work desperately in order to let his woman have a comfortable life, I can feel that he tries very hard to satisfy me when we’re together, so I always act like I’m satisfied, but in reality I’ve deliberately suppressed part of my desire. After having a one-night stand with Deng Weida, it’s like I suddenly just realized that I’m not a person like that, and that he’s really just like the first feeling I had about him, really ‘very different’.” This could probably be considered a summary of what Li Li said about that night, and after they ended their passion, Li Li’s mind came up with an almost crazy idea: she wanted to be with Deng Weida.
She told Deng Weida about the idea, and he just smiled and kissed her on the forehead, saying nothing.
The moment Chen Dong, who came back from a business trip, opened the door of his house, Li Li didn’t rush up to her as usual and throw her arms around her neck to be pampered, she filled up the bathtub for Chen Dong for the first time and made a cup of tea for him for the first time, Li Li tried to get back the feeling she had when she was taking care of Deng Weida on Chen Dong’s body, that kind of caring and wanting to protect, but there was none, she felt like she was mechanically acting like a person set up ahead of time to do all these things for Chen Dong, but she didn’t, she felt that she was doing all these things for Chen Dong as if she was being set up in advance. programmed, stiff and cold.
She began to despair of herself. Chen Dong seemed to have sensed something, he felt uneasy because of Li Li’s abnormal behavior. So when Li Li walked up to him and said “Let’s break up”, Chen Dong was not as shocked as she thought, but he still froze, holding the gift he was about to hand Li Li.
Chen Dong talked to Li Li for the whole night, he wanted to know the reason, but Li Li only told him that she was tired of this well taken care of life that had no ripples at all. In fact, Li Li did have a feeling of being bound by Chen Dong, by all the good that Chen Dong had done for her, and whenever she had crazy thoughts, she couldn’t help but back away from them when she thought of Chen Dong’s eyes.
At dawn Chen Dong tiredly left Li Li’s room, he said, “If you want to break up because you don’t feel happy with me, I agree to break up, I want you to be happy because I love you. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to give you the happiness you wanted, but please believe me, I’ve tried my best.”
Although Li Li shed tears, she was at that time she was not ready to turn back, she said that people in that kind of time is like a demon, can not listen to anything, in addition to Deng Weida she is too lazy to think about anything else, anything can be given up.
During the day, she asked Deng Weida to the same cafe where they used to date, and as they drank coffee together, with the sun shining through the window, Li Li had the illusion that she and Deng Weida were already together, feeling that Deng Weida had opened a flash of a window to a new life for her.
Deng Weida is playful and childlike, and Li Li imagines herself as this child’s mother.
Deng Weida received a call from a friend to go fishing in the suburbs and couldn’t wait to fly there, while Li Li returned to school with Deng Weida’s computer because she still had class in the afternoon.
In the evening, when she was using Deng Weida’s computer at school to send e-mails to her friends, the computer automatically went to Deng Weida’s mailbox. She saw Deng Weida’s girlfriend wrote him a love letter overflowing with infinite fondness filled with infatuation.
Li Li clearly remembers that one of them was sent on the day they got together, and in that letter the person who sent the EMAIL mentioned the wonderful night she had spent with Deng Weida the day before and said that she was so looking forward to meeting Deng Weida again.
That means that just the night before Li Li was with him, in the same room, on the same bed, Deng Weida was doing their same thing with another woman.
In the mailbox, there are still letters written by Deng Weida to other women, they are distributed all over the world, the United States, Japan, Germany, and the content of what he wrote is the same, he addressed each woman as “baby”, in each letter at the end of the “I miss you”, and he wrote to each woman, he wrote to each woman with such passion. The words of love he wrote to each woman were so passionate ……
“It was a huge blow to me.” Li Li laughed out, “But women are stupid sometimes, do you know what I thought after reading those letters? I was convinced that Deng Weida’s feelings for me were different from those for them, I’m a painter, I’m in the arts, I’m so different from them.”
At night, Deng Weida’s friend went to Li Li’s office to take away his computer, Li Li called him, he said to call her back later, so that day Li Li waited in the office until dawn, did not wait for Deng Weida’s phone, waiting for but has been looking for her a night Chen Dong.
Entering the office, Chen Dong looked at the waxen-faced Li Li and kept blaming himself, “I was so stupid, I should have left my home with you!”
Li Li cried out and hugged Chen Dong, following him back home.
Chen Dong said to her, “As long as you take good care of yourself, what do you want I promise you, we go to high school together with the university together to find a job together to buy a house, a woman’s life in the best years you are with me through, I’m so thankful for you, I hope that you are happy …… “
Li Li cried even more sadly, he felt sorry for Chen Dong, but could not leave Deng Weida.
Her life was completely disrupted, her and Chen Dong’s affair reached her parents, who rushed to Beijing on the same day and persuaded her to come back to her heart, and the next day, Chen Dong’s mother also rushed over from her hometown, caressing her son’s waning face as she cried her heart out.
Even so, Li Li was still thinking of Deng Weida in her heart, and couldn’t forget the wonderful passion-filled night he had given him.
Li Li ran out of the house to call Deng Weida, he has turned off his cell phone, she simply ran to Deng Weida live in the hotel to look for, he has checked out of the room, Li Li to her and Deng Weida common friend to call, ask him to help look for, but the friend but also love can not help.
Returning home after a day of running, she was still greeted by Chen Dong’s concerned gaze.
At night, when Li Li got up to use the restroom, she happened to hear a conversation between Chen Dong and his mother.
His mother was crying to persuade Chen Dong to leave Li Li: “Son, you see what you have been tortured by her? Li Li’s heart is too cruel, I saw it a long time ago, you have not had a father since you were a child, mom raised you to such a large age because she wanted to see you happy, the way you are now is getting to zap my heart, leave her, even if you can’t find a wife for the rest of your life mom won’t agree that you should be with her again.”
All that came from the room was a loud sigh from Chen Dong, he said, “She has become a part of my life, when I come home if I don’t see her, I feel like something is missing, and I wouldn’t be me without Li Li.”
“There are so many nice girls out there and you can’t find one that fits?”
“I don’t know what kind of good girl you’re talking about, all I know is that I don’t love anyone else, I love Li Li. Even if she does leave, as long as she finds the life she wants, I don’t care if I find a good girl or a bad girl, just get by.”
Chen Dong’s mom was so angry that she cried while tapping his shoulder, “Silly son, you’re really stupid ……”
Li Li said that at that moment her body had lost consciousness, and she slowly sat down on the ground against the root of the wall. She felt remorse for hurting Chen Dong. One-night stand such things should not have happened in her life, but since it has happened, one should be relieved to treat it as an adult game, Deng Weida is like that, Li Li thought, there will be a few women in the world who are stupid enough to love the object of one-night stand? It was also at that moment that she seemed to come to her senses, for the so-called one-night stand object that she fell in love with, she was just a one-night stand object, in that night, even if it wasn’t herself there would be another woman to spend the night with Deng Weida.
“Until now Chen Dong does not know Deng Weida this person, does not know that I have a one night stand with Deng Weida, he has always thought that I want to leave him because he did not do enough, his people are too boring, and he is also trying to make himself interesting, learning to enjoy life instead of just making money. In fact, this matter is quite simple, and it is easy to figure out, the reason why I am so crazy obsessed with Deng Weida just because I experienced too little in terms of male and female emotions, Chen Dong is my first love, I have never had intimate contact with a man outside of him, and Deng Weida’s night may have aroused a woman’s bones of that kind of desire, I believe that in the subconscious of a woman’s desire to derail, which is also the human nature The weakness of the human nature – always want to seek stimulation, try to never have new things, after trying to determine a point, Deng Weida that man is not suitable for me.