Memories of First Love (1)
Everyone’s first love is not the same, now I am a wife, but still think of the days with him, you can say that the pain was more than happiness, and now the memories are no longer bitter and happy respectively, just the memory of such a person.
I am not a beautiful girl, especially in middle school, people are very fat, although often want to experience the taste of love, but no one will notice my existence, on the third year of high school, people suddenly slim, and began to dress up, as if the woman 18 changes, but I did not notice this, a long time low self-esteem, and to cope with the homework, so to the men of the time on my good will are not aware of it, this is after I got married! It was only after I got married that I realized that there were a lot of guys who wanted to play with me in my senior year of high school, but I acted too proud and others didn’t dare to do so.
Finally went to college, liberated, I really hope to have a boyfriend. Speaking of which, the first time I saw him was on the way to school, the car was very crowded that day, I was in the car, he was under the car, when the school just started, we are not very familiar, I know he is my classmate, but the name does not remember. Because the car is very crowded, the door is always closed, he stood idly under the car, and do not intend to suffer to squeeze the car, and did not see me, so I had the opportunity to take a good look at him a few eyes. In fact, at that time I have no feelings for him, just this person, tall, thin, very temperamental look, can always cause people’s attention. The car finally drove away, I continued to recall his appearance, began to be a little heartbroken, this boy is quite good.
The suburban car, wait and wait, not see the car, to wait for him to come, the station was a lot of people, we care about their own vanity, as who did not see who. Finally came to the car, a small car can not accommodate so many people, I carry a heavy reference book, do not need to grab the door, that is, get on the car also need to be loose slowly on, had to give up, the station is empty, only the old and the sick and disabled.
The day gradually darkened, I can not help but be afraid of the heart, the school in the suburbs, down the car still have to walk through the vegetable fields far, far away, I’m a person how to do. Finally, the old days open eyes to a string of cars, I was in the last one on the car, the heart expects to bang on a few classmates, like gall, or else in the car back to the city, find a place to pass, and then go back to school tomorrow during the day.
When I got off the bus, it was already a starry night, and except for a little light at the station, it was pitch black a few steps away, not a single classmate, not a single person. I hugged my school bag, my skirt rubbed coolly on my legs, my body was cold, and my heart was pounding. Forget it, let’s go back to the city.
Want to go over to the opposite side, looked around, not far from the side of the road seems to be squatting a person, I was afraid of this in my heart, feet to the opposite side of the run, the schoolbag bias is not competitive, can not help the weight of the book, the strap broke, like a sledgehammer kind of smashed in my feet, my tears are about to fall down. Back to look again, the man even to run towards me again, I threw the bag to run, thankful that I wore a pair of flat shoes, usually adhere to the exercise, running general people can not catch up with (I am the national long-distance runners second-class athletes).
The man shouted, “Don’t run, I’m coming to get you.” What do you care what you say, run! Who knows not two steps was caught in the right, because I ran, I can not hear anything, “hiss” sound, the silk shirt from the shoulders of the split, I simply a little hysterical, “ah! Ah!” I screamed. After breaking free and then running forward, tears and snot all down (our school has been gang-raped here before, the school leadership repeatedly instructed not to return home at night). The foot is soft, actually fell a big horse slump.
That’s when a large hand held on my shoulder, “It’s me.” I heard someone yelling over and over again and turned around to blur out that it was him! Not caring about anything anymore, I threw myself into his arms and let out a sob.
The sky was dark without any edge, the wind did not know when it blew, my clothes were hissed away most of my clothes, people trembling, I do not know when he had sat down, and took me all in his arms. I stopped crying, only sobbing, the whole person again sweat, tears, dirt, no strength at all, although realized in the arms of a strange man, also have no strength to stand up again.
His hand was large and warm around me, and it was as if I had melted into his chest. Without a word, the other hand slowly lifted my head on his chest, and there was nothing to see but his bright eyes.
“It’s okay, I’ve been waiting here for you for a long time, I thought you weren’t coming back!”
Fluttering a string of tears fell from my red, swollen eyes. He lowered his head deeply and kissed me from the corner of my eye, and my heart began to beat, for the first time, even though I was 19. His hands began to move slowly, over my bare back, starting at my shoulders, slowly down and then down again, his lips landed on mine, his tongue was opening my lips, my teeth, probing my tongue before grabbing it and not letting it go any further, my coldness began to fade and my breathing became tight. His hands went around to my chest, forcing their way under my bra, one large hand taking my breast in.
My breathing tightened even more, in time with his heavy heartbeat, and I was inexplicably hot down there, spreading to the base of my thighs, the whole triangle taking on a tingling sensation. My waist was pushed by a hard piece of him, his lips scratched my lips, so that I could go in for a breath, his lips touched the root of my ear, gently biting it, low voice: “Your breasts are so big and firm, your waist is so thin.” His hands have started to pinch my nipples, I can’t help but moan, his force is rather greater.
“Your nipples are slowly sticking out like thorns.” I slowly fell into his lap at the sound of his voice, letting his hands wander over my breasts. One of my silk shirts was already torn to shreds. He deftly unhooked my bra, so my breasts were spread out in front of him. The moon climbed out of the clouds and I saw his admiring gaze.
“You’re so white!” His hand continued to walk, unbuttoning my skirt and reaching down. Ahh! My triangle was trembling now, and he rubbed around the outside of my narrow panties, touching my scattered hairs, and finally he went in and caressed his hand, caressing my thick hairs, and I began to squirm and moan with unease.
He seemed to revel in my moaning and writhing, and finally his hand gently touched my door, which was already wet, and he couldn’t help but giggle. At my door, his hand moved up and down, parting my bottom lip from below, following the dampness, coming upwards, stopping at my nub and rubbing it again in a circular motion, and the sensation of my inner emptiness intensified, and I began to unconsciously grab at his face, his lips, and his breasts, and the man wriggled.
He guided my hand to his sharp instrument and I was amazed at this, I didn’t realize that men could be so majestic, I held it carefully, not knowing what to do.
“First time?” He asked me in a somewhat surprised tone, “Well.” I replied.
He pushed me away gently and stopped everything. The cold wind blew over me and my senses inexplicably stopped.
“I can’t be responsible for you.” So he stood and helped me up, and I stood at a loss for words as he still so gently gathered my hair together and hid my clothes from me as best he could. Still the same big hand that warmly wiped the dirt and sweat and tears from my face and pulled me back toward the road.
We seemed to have run a long way, and walked a long way back to the station, and I was so tired from the inside out that I was no longer able to draw back my hand, or to think or say anything! The bag was still there, he picked it up, for him the weight of that bag was really nothing!
“Did you bring any other clothes?” He had regained his composure and asked me thoughtfully. I pulled out of my bag a fall outfit I’d picked up in passing when I’d bought my reference books, and donned into the dark shadows to change. Finding a bottle of water (prepared for the road, didn’t throw it away) and paper towels I washed my face and gathered my hair in my hands. My hair is very long, a lot, just tossed a long time ago can not look, casually make a few coiled up, tied. The silk dress has long been out of shape, holding in the hand ready to throw away.
He kept his back to the dark shadow and didn’t say a word. After I finished packing, my body was much lighter, out of the dark shadow, stood beside him, it was already midnight, the field was silent, we did not have a word. For a long time, he turned to look at me, surprised at how quickly I packed up so stop, actually smiled.
“You look beautiful!” Then he started introducing himself, saying his name, his age, his hobbies, and at this little station he told me that he couldn’t possibly be responsible for anyone, that he didn’t have that, that he didn’t want to ruin my future, and that even though he had a lot of sexual experience, it was never with a virgin, and that he was afraid. Besides, we don’t know much about each other, and it was really impulsive just now.
He was indeed waiting for me here, afraid that I would be too late to come back alone, just doing his duty as a senior, etc. He said a lot, but I just listened and did not react, I didn’t know what to say, and perhaps I didn’t want to say anything… Subsequently, my life at the university was colorful and varied, I participated in all kinds of activities, but I was never interested in boys, and I joined the school’s modern dance class because I had a good figure, and I had a previous foundation in ballet. I joined the school’s modern dance class, because of my good figure and previous ballet foundation, I became the leader of the team, and every day after school I devoted myself to the training. I refused to go on dates with everyone and was called “Cold Sense”. I could only smile as I watched the other girls go out with different boys.
I just couldn’t get him out of my mind, I couldn’t forget the tight breathing, the aches and pains, the warm palms, and whenever I thought about it I rushed to the training hall, dressed in my tight training clothes, and danced like crazy in front of the mirror.
Sometimes I can bump into him at school, surrounded by different pretty girls. He was known as the playboy of the school, but he was a good student and earned money (he had his own company outside), and when we passed by, I could feel his scent, like his hands wrapped around my breasts. We just nodded our heads.
A year went by, he was graduating and I always heard from him from different sources. My heart had indescribable feelings that maybe I could be okay with him being gone. I wished in my heart.
The school was having a graduation ceremony for them, and the dance team had to put on a show, one of those ultra-modern things, choreographed or hired from some other shithole, and anyway that damn choreography screwed us over. The day of the dance, he was sitting in the front row (representing the best students). I was wearing a flesh-colored dance costume, stretching and swaying in front of him, as if there was no more music, no more lights, and only his bright eyes were left in the dark, like that night. We stared and tore into each other, and I knew that tonight would be another sleepless night.
The dance received unprecedented applause, waking me up and hastily withdrawing backstage. The choreographer said that I had given the best performance of the night and that he was going to buy me dinner alone, which I declined with a smile. Granted on the coat, I slowly walked towards the practice ballroom, in front of a large mirror I looked at my own towering breasts, long legs, in a piece of flesh-colored dance clothes as if naked, I was suddenly so afraid, turn off all the lights, I quietly lie down, let the tears down the face. I can’t believe I watched enough of him today for 10 minutes without anyone interrupting.
In the distance the auditorium was buzzing with festivities, and I actually fell asleep in the hall after the extreme physical and mental strain. In a trance, a pair of warm hands traced over my forehead, my stomach, my legs and back again, stopping at my breast and encircling it. I knew I was dreaming again. Tears streamed down my face once more.
He was calling me, still low, and I didn’t move for fear of waking up from my dream. He took me up gently, like that night, he kissed my tears kissed the tip of my nose and finally landed on my lips, very, very gently. He stayed like that for a long time without moving a muscle. I told myself it wasn’t a dream, it wasn’t. I open my eyes and I see his thick hair, and reaching out, I touch his prickly face due to his long beard.
He confirmed my sobriety as his movements began to be so rough, his hands were so strong, his entire palm rubbing my breast as if he was going to pinch her off, his tongue invading my mouth, endlessly probing downward, and I was almost a little scared as he pressed me like a doll against his chest. Without a word, he pulled me to my feet, draped me in my clothes and ran out the door as if he had no life, there was a Mercedes in front of the school, presumably he wanted to use it for tonight’s outing, and I had known that he was now inordinately wealthy.
Still not a word, he was so vicious and I was even more afraid to say a word. He threw me in the car and left the school at high speed, five minutes later he stopped in front of a farmer’s yard, it was dark inside, he was like a madman, he didn’t allow me to ask questions. Into the main room, close the door, the house what kind of I can not see, a dark, but my dance clothes seem particularly bright.
This time he was even more wanton, he picked me up in a horizontal hug, I was stiff and unresponsive, he threw me on the bed, no matter how I pushed back, no matter how heavily I bit him when he kissed me, his hands roamed all over my body recklessly through my smooth ball gown, his lips rolled over my ear and neck, he began to bite me, began to pinch me, like a volcano that had finally erupted after a long time of patience.
I couldn’t afford to struggle with him anymore, instead I started to cooperate with his madness, he finally found the zipper of my ballgown and removed my ballgown, I was completely naked in front of him, he pressed his whole body, I was even more unable to refuse, my breath started to catch, I started to moan inexplicably, I started to wriggle, I started to feel wetness. His hand rested on my bottom, feeling my wetness and started rubbing my nub, my legs had been spread by him and he was in between me, I felt sore and numb down there, I couldn’t tell you how empty it was.
He intensified his pinching of my nubs, and I began to moan loudly and began to involuntarily pinch my own nipples, and very forcefully, having relieved the itch and emptiness down there. He stopped his hand. But I was still twisting and pinching myself. Now he stayed outside of me with his sharp tool, moving up and down, and pressed down as I held my waist high.
“Ahhhhhh,” I screamed out in agony, a tearing pain coming from the bottom up, my whole bottom already full of him. He didn’t stop at my cry, he began his manly conquests, he pumped up and down, bravely moving in and out while I oozed more fluid as he pumped. Feeling fuller than I had ever felt before after the pain, my legs were held high and apart, not knowing how to cooperate with him as his sweat ran down my face.
Suddenly he rolled me over whole and pushed into me again, my heart was slammed into him again and again, his hands were in front of me one grabbing my breasts and squeezing them, the other rubbing on my pussy core, I was no longer in control of myself at all, I could only feel the uncontrollable contraction in my heart of the flower, secreting and cooing, my whole body seemed as if that was the only thing that existed, all the sensations came from there.
Finally, I felt his sharp instrument vibrate more forcefully, while a hot stream of fluid, like a fired bullet, shot into my center of my flower.
We were limp together, him still on top of me from behind, his heavy breathing ringing in my ears as his sharp instrument slid limply out from underneath me, and I could still feel the wetness and heat down there. Neither of us had any strength left, however, and we stayed like that for a long time until the sweat had fully dried up and his breathing had calmed down, and then he rolled over helplessly to lie beside me.
His top was still on and I looked at him sideways, even though it was in the dark I could still see his bright eyes, one of his hands began to gather my messy hair, tracing it over my ear, my shoulder and stopping at my waist, he buried his head into my chest and I realized he was trembling so I hugged him tighter.
The sun was shining on my eyes and I felt pain all over my body, I couldn’t lift anywhere, especially down there, it was like fire and my mouth was dry. I barely managed to open my eyes when I came across his bright eyes, reminding me of everything that happened last night, and all I could do was smile at him.
He handed me a glass of water, smiled and said: “Your first time on this so great, except for me, others can not cope with you.” I sat up and drank the water, get out of bed, only to realize that he is still naked, hastily looking for a sheet to cover, a single bright red. He laughed softly at me, then gently took the sheet in his hands and withdrew my body as he stood in the sunlight looking at me carefully from top to bottom. We had never looked at each other in the daylight before, and I was a little nervous.
“You’re beautiful!” He praised heartily. “Don’t, don’t, just give me the dress.” I was a little hung over. He embraced me and his hands started moving over my body again, stopping at my breasts, stroking them carefully and lifting her up in his hands, “So heavy, aren’t you tired of carrying her around?” He said, almost a little roguishly, “How old?” “Do not tell you!” “38B, I can tell.” “It’s 38C, silly!”
His hands started to get harder, both of them started to move on my body, he took me strongly in his arms, his hands stopped on my hips, and started to kiss me carefully, very carefully, like he was afraid of hurting me. His tongue gently teased mine, and I responded tamely, both our breaths starting to come faster in his gentleness.
We retreated to the bed and lay down on our sides. I began to unbutton his shirt and his firm chest was exposed, he looked lean on the outside, but he was so muscular, and all my arousal cells went into full action when my hand touched him, so literally touching a man’s body. He guided my hand towards his lower body and showed me how to hold it and how to move it. “Last time, it was the moment you touched it, you reacted wrong and I thought it was your first time.” He told me softly and I squeezed him harder.
Our naked skin was completely rubbed together, our four hands exploring every part of each other’s bodies as he taught me how and where I should touch and stroked every sensitive part of my body. I couldn’t begin to stand him any longer and I began to shake my body. This time he was gentle, he laid me on top of him and he showed me how to sit on him slowly, so I had the sensation of fullness, his hands were on my breasts propping me up while I let my body sit all the way down and swirled in place, experiencing the squeezing that was going on in the center of my flower. Then I started to flow, I started to spasm, I started to move my hips up and down, I started to moan, I started to be uncontrollable, I started to jerk wildly, pressing down with my whole body, and he started to cooperate with me, to match my bobbing, and to touch my core.
I don’t know how long it took, but I heard him moan, I felt the downward flow of fluids, I felt the jets of water rushing up, and I knew that once again we were meeting at the highest peak.
“You’re awesome!” He complimented me. And how often is he not!
I was so tired that we lay there and I began to listen to him ramble on about how he felt when he saw me this year, about how much he regretted what he had done to me that day, about how many times he had peeked outside of the ballroom to see my only son dancing wildly. He didn’t dare to have any more expectations of me until last night when I looked at him in such a state of ecstasy.
I smiled happily.
Memories of First Love (2)
When he came back, I had finished having a good time and was sitting on the couch watching TV in boredom. He smiled and turned on the light, it was already dark, he took several large tapes and put them by the door, I suddenly felt that I had nothing to say to him, after all, we know so little about each other. He sat gently on the side of me, watching me wearing his clothes: “Not bad, tomorrow will wear back to school!” I did not say anything, he pulled me up from the couch.
“Hungry?” “Almost starving!” “Let’s go out to eat.” “I don’t have any clothes, I’m not going.” He was so happy, he picked up those big belts: “For you.” I flipped it open, and wow! All kinds of clothes, formal, casual, halter dresses, black turtlenecks, all good styles, good materials, good colors, I never had. My clothes are just a few, and they’re all pretty outdated. What woman isn’t vain, especially at that age.
“I don’t want it.” For some reason, I started to play a little temper: “You don’t have to return the favor, and I don’t need you to be responsible.” My year’s worth of grievances suddenly erupted.
He flinched for a moment, good-naturedly said: “Do not play temper, look what I bought you?” With that, he grabbed a bunch of lingerie from one of the pink straps, in various colors, lace, semi-transparent, fully transparent, high-strap, half-cup, full-cup, with or without…
“It’s a shame you don’t wear these with a body like that.”
“You buy these things at the mall?” My mouth dropped open into an O.
“No, I have a buddy who sells these, but these aren’t his posers, I asked him to get me authentic name brands just for me, and he says good lingerie is a woman’s second body.”
“Looks like you often have girlfriends who go to his place to get their underwear.” I said in a kek-thin voice.
“No!” He was a little upset: “Come and try.”
I stood there and didn’t move, he suddenly got angry: “Fuck! Who do you think you are? Where’s your temper? It’s the first time I’ve met someone like that.” All of his swear words came out: “I’m so blind, I want to treat you well, to appease your heart.” He calmed down a lot and started to reason.
I remained motionless, with a look of incompatibility.
“Love whoever.” He pushed his way out. I cried, so hard, I actually wanted to hear him say that he loved me, that he wanted me, wanted me for life. After crying, he still hadn’t come back, I didn’t know if he was out or in another room. I washed my face, coiled up my hair, thought about it, there is nothing to stay, there was no understanding between us, just the impulse of young people, we can not have a future.
I picked out what I thought was the cheapest, navy blue A-line dress with thin suspenders from the clothes he had bought, picked out a blue lace lingerie to match, and picked up a pair of black flat leather shoes. Loaded up my ball gown and shoes. Went out with a thin gray jacket over the dress.
I walked out of his small courtyard, and it seemed like a long time before I crossed the vegetable field and reached the entrance of the school, when he suddenly appeared behind me like a ghost and whispered, “In the future, don’t walk alone at night, don’t be alone in the practice room, and don’t go home with random men.” I didn’t look back at him, continued into the school, into the dormitory.
The ones in the same room saw me and made a fuss saying they thought I was missing and were going to call the police! I smiled at them, they complimented me on my beautiful dress, they saw the bruise on my neck, they joked about me, I smiled at them. They stopped talking and laughing and dispersed.
During the night, I dreamed of his naked body, of my naked body, of us tearing at each other, possessing each other. It was dawn, and the bed was left two wet pieces, one on the pillow and one underneath.
The days afterward were quiet again, and I took it easy when he wasn’t on campus; I left the dance team, started coping with the heavy load of sophomore year homework, and began to look for some work off-campus to earn some money to spend. I also started to meet all kinds of guys, but I could never find a feeling for them, and there was nothing else to do except to just go out and have fun.
I’ve kissed them and they’ve kissed me, always after the first kiss, and we’ve become good friends between knowing men and women without further ado.
My off-campus job is mainly doing some secretarial work in some big companies. Because of my good computer, good English, hardworking and strict mouth, I was appreciated by my boss, who agreed that I could bring some things back to school to take away to do and gave me a personal computer, and usually the company’s business was solved by us through telex. During the holidays, I worked at his place every day, and when the school year started, I reported twice without a month, took the work, took the salary, and the mutual understanding was very good.
Once he suddenly telephoned me and asked me to come to the office in the evening to pick up some documents that had to be dealt with right away, and I didn’t think twice about it; I had to go into town to buy something anyway, so it was just a good idea to take care of it all at once.
I arrived at the office at 6:00, my boss was busy, and I was in the habit of sitting at the service desk waiting for him to finish before giving me the job. “Good, we will work together next time.” A year after the fact, his voice is still so familiar, I dare not look up, just hope that he walks past me, do not pay attention to me such a small secretary. He walked out, my heart beating rapidly, and my scalp tingled as he seemed to linger at the service desk.
The owner came out and politely sent him away. The boss saw me and let me in. This time all the blinds in his office were fully lowered, “Maybe it’s because of the trade secret talk earlier!” I thought to myself. The boss casually closed the door and we were the only ones left in the room. The boss must be about 50 years old, he must have been a beautiful man when he was young, but now he is a bit middle-aged and fat, but he still has a demeanor, and I have always regarded him as my father.
I waited for him to get me the document again, and he called me over to his desk and said he was going to explain the work to me, which is usually mostly told to me by his secretary. He asked me to stand beside him, it was a cold winter’s day outside, but inside the room was very warm due to the air conditioning, I didn’t expect to be here for so long, I was still wearing my overcoat, and I started to sweat densely. The boss gave me a look: “Take off your coat, I have a long talk ahead of me.” The company began to leave one by one, I took off my coat and stood beside him.
That day I was wearing a goose-yellow cashmere sweater, white jeans and goose-yellow moccasins. He couldn’t help but stare at me for a moment as he began to continue explaining the document. OMG! It was actually a document about doing business with him, who was now a prima facie successful entrepreneur, with his picture large on the skin of the document. The boss said he wanted to do business with him, but for the first time he wanted to know his details, knowing that he and I were from the same university that’s why he gave me such an important thing, I couldn’t help but move closer to the boss’s side, attaching myself to him, I wanted to get a clearer look at him.
I was so engrossed in the bright eyes in his photo that I didn’t speak. Strangely enough, the boss was also engrossed and didn’t seem to be reading the document. Suddenly I felt a large, warm hand stroke down my back, from above, like his when we first met. I didn’t move and continued to stare into those eyes as if they were already alive in front of me.
The movement of the hands became more wanton, on my chest, on my hips, on my junction, and I closed my eyes as if it were his hands, his bright eyes right in front of me, and someone was embracing me so tightly from the front that I couldn’t tell who it was: him, or the boss.
My lips were expertly parted, a smooth tongue rested against my mouth, wrapping around my tongue, and a pair of large, warm hands began to caress me hard all over my body, and I couldn’t help but climb up into the other man’s neck, kissing back as much as I wanted.
The lights in the room suddenly dimmed, turned off by the building’s general control, and I began to squirm, began to undulate back and forth. My sweater had been thrown at my feet, my shoes were long gone, my pants were down to my feet, and I stood there almost naked. I enjoyed it, from leaving him, I always remembered my orgasms, but I couldn’t feel anything anymore, they still called me cold.
I began to feel a change down there as my partner finally gently removed the last of my shy clothes. Unprepared, I was pushed down onto the large table, warm hands pressed on my private parts, began to move, a long finger along the vagina, I could not help but “ah ~” screamed out, wriggling to match the finger’s provocation, I already feel my breasts heating, heartbeat is accelerating, down there is throbbing, dripping fluids! Waiting to be conquered.
He got on his back, and in the center of my open legs he pushed in, and in the slippery tube he stood erect, moving back and forth, gasping, as he squeezed and rubbed my breasts, and I kept pushing up in concert, squirming on the big desk, on his picture, and I saw his bright eyes.
Finally he let go, resting on my flat belly. He gasped and instead I was surprisingly calm, not upset or happy about the fluid flow, I was just physically satisfied. I pushed my boss away, found a tissue to clean up, found my clothes and put them on, and sat looking at my boss. He stood up coyly, without a word, got dressed, put on a tie, and straightened his hair, and was my loving father again.
We didn’t say another word about what had just happened, and he tried to, but I got around it. I told the boss : “I don’t know the guy in the picture, he was about to graduate when I was in school, as if he had good grades. I can’t help you with what the boss is trying to do, so you can dock my paycheck.”
It was rare for me to run into the boss when I went back to the office, but job or no job, no one was going to fire the temp, and the paycheck was still growing.
┅┅
Turning to the fourth year of college, each is busy looking for a job, each make heart, make means.
My boss sent me a telex saying that he could introduce me to a good job with a good position, good pay, and a future. I haven’t seen my boss for a long time and I haven’t gone back to get my paycheck, it’s not like I’m doing anything for him, it’s just that the computer I really didn’t feel like sending back.
Anyway, I didn’t have a job, and now it was April and I didn’t know what to do, and it was time to return the computer, so I made an appointment with my boss. Ever since I wore the blue dress I picked out from him, I’ve been particularly partial to the color blue, especially in the early spring season, and love being all blue. Almost a Smurf.
In order to see the work, I will have my hair properly coiled up, so as to appear older, in fact, my classmates said that every time I coiled up a style, in addition to increasing the sexiness of not much change. I wore a dark blue thin woolen long-sleeved dress, is A font, I am now more and more thin, the whole face only a pair of eyes, the face has been white transparent, the same room that I will soon become a fairy, can not eat, do not drink, do not have a boyfriend. The dresses were almost a bit wobbly on my body, and even my boobs, which I had always been proud of, were much smaller, and now I could only wear a 38B. To appear healthier, I put on some lipstick and a little red powder.
I made an appointment with my boss to meet him in the lobby of the office building, but I didn’t want to go to his office anymore. When I saw him, I marveled at the trickery of time. It had been less than 2 years, but the boss had lost a lot of hair and his back had started to bend, so it was hard to imagine that he was still so energetic at that time.
Let’s go to that company to talk about it. It so happens that I also have something to ask their boss. Maybe the boss was still sorry for me and wanted to accompany me. I couldn’t refuse, so I let him. Along the way, he kept telling me about the company, the position he wanted to recommend me for, and the treatment. The boss said there was no problem, the two companies have been doing business for almost 3 years, both sides trust and work well together. I listened in silence.
To that, the boss of that company is quite a spectrum, only said first and my boss to talk about business, let his private secretary to receive and examine me, soon the interview was completed, I believe my performance is not bad, the secretary to ask for my resume to send it in, listened to the boss, I really quite want to do in this company. Half a day my boss came out and told me that he had to leave first, this boss was very interested in me, to personally interview, he did not accompany me.
The secretary introduced me to my boss’s office and knowingly closed the door as he faced the window and looked out. He didn’t make a sound, so I had to stand in the center of the room, quietly waiting for him to turn around. The room was silent and I couldn’t help but cough my staff softly to get his attention. My legs started to shake a little, as if I realized something was about to happen. I’d barely eaten anything in the last few days trying to find a job, and after traveling from school to the city, and then here, and the interview, I was already feeling a little dizzy, and my health was really getting worse.
There was no sound, no response, and the person sitting there seemed to be asleep, and as if he was thinking deeply about something again, so I had to cheer up: “Excuse me, is there anything you want to ask me? Your time is very precious, I hope I can answer your questions in a short time and to your satisfaction.” I said softly.
There was no reply, so I started memorizing my resume, and I was already starting to get a little impatient, and I’ve always had a bad temper. I kept reminding myself to be patient, this is begging people to place you in a job.
Suddenly, his voice rang out, “How many boyfriends did you have in college?” The big boss chair turned around, I saw his bright eyes, I feel like in another world. “You!!!” I exhaled, and then everything turned dark, very deep black, like our first meeting, like the dance hall, like his small courtyard main house, and then everything lit up, as if I rose up to the clouds, I did not have a little weight, I was floating in the world of seven colors.
Then I heard someone calling my name from a distance, saying to me: “Don’t walk alone at night, don’t… don’t…” The voice was closer, it was someone calling my name, several people, it was very chaotic! I was back, back in the world of weight, everything was so heavy, I couldn’t move anywhere. Someone pinched me in the middle, “Ahhhh” I screamed out, opening my eyes forcibly, I saw the secretary’s face, and several people I didn’t recognize. I was lying in a warm embrace that I knew was his chest.
“You guys go out!” He said, “I’ll take care of the lady.” The crowd cast strange glances and left.
He slowly picked me up, he watched as tears streamed down my face, he slowly laid me down on his couch, he gently wiped away my tears as he made to stand up, I hurriedly grabbed his hands, they were still there, still warm, so my tears flowed freely. He let me cry without a sound.
Holding his hand I inexplicably felt my body temperature rise, my breasts began to swell, I began to feel sensation on my inner thighs, my lips began to kiss at his palm, starting at the tip of his hand, I guided his hand to rest on my chest, I guided his hand to continue downward. He began to touch me harder, every inch of me, and I could still feel the heat of his hands through my clothes.
The air began to heat up, my breath began to catch, his hands stroked over me more rapidly, my skirt had been lifted up to my waist, his hands had actually touched my skin, and I felt him shiver, finally he kissed, seemingly with the strength of his life. He wrapped me tightly into his arms and we had rolled onto his thick carpet. I began unbuttoning his buttons, removing his tie, and I explored touching his leviathan, using the methods he’d taught me.
Without much prelude, without other tricks, without sounds, except for ragged gasps, he angled his head into my forest, and once again I plunged into the depths, and once again I felt the pounding, and once again I sweated, and once again my fluids raged, and once again I felt his majesty, and once again I felt his powerful pounding, and once again I felt his hunger, and once again, like a conquistador, he spilled all of his energy into my body.
Finally, everything stopped, and all that was left was sticky liquid or liquid, and he whispered in my ear, “Stay with me forever, don’t leave me, I’m responsible for you.” I dissolved in his voice.
We lay like this for a long time, he finally stood up, pulled me up, hands on my waist: “Why are you so thin, so bad health?” I looked at him, no words, he buried his head in my shoulder: “I am no longer young, I will cherish you, in front of you I no longer have personality.”
What more could I ask for? The love of my life, he was right in front of me. I lifted his head, I saw his moist bright eyes and I smiled at him.
In his private bathroom, we cleaned up and I re-did my head. He suddenly told me that he saw my head at my boss’s place 2 years ago and was afraid to recognize it, coupled with his arrogance. I didn’t tell him what happened between me and my boss, after all that was in the past.
We left his office together, everyone seemed to be looking down at their work, everyone was looking at me again, and he instructed his secretary on a few things and said not to come to the office for the next two days, and not to call him on his cell phone unless it was particularly important.
He didn’t care what the employees were looking at and held my waist as he walked out of the office, it was so sunny outside!
He said he would check my health first and that he wanted to fatten me up. I pulled him in and told him that I was starving like crazy and that I didn’t want to throw a tantrum like the last time I was hungry. He laughed heartily in the car, and his hand stayed there on mine, saying that he couldn’t see it from outside anyway, and that he’d thought about it all these years all the time.
I’ve never eaten as “well” as I did today, and he didn’t say a word, but watched me eat, and when I finally got around to eating dessert, he had to stop me: “I don’t want you to die.” We laughed for no reason.
After leaving the restaurant, I told him that my stockings were torn and I had to buy new ones. I was no longer as embarrassed as I was last time, and he was not at all as ingratiating as he had been last time. Everything was so natural that it was as if we had never been apart in the past few years. He watched me pick this and that in the shopping center, he willingly became my porter. Walked past the underwear counter, I am still a little embarrassed, looked twice, unwillingly walked away, he secretly laughed at me.
We ran around the shopping center like little kids, and when we finally couldn’t carry it anymore, he bought me a big Kitty cat and said it was a gift for me.
Back in the car, we stared at each other, holding each other again, kissing again. He somehow managed to darken the entire glass of the car, and the compartment became our world of two. He couldn’t wait to pull my legs apart and remove my clothes, usurping me into a tiny ball, lowering the chair as he leaned in and began to kiss me, his lips lingering on my pussy lips, sucking repeatedly, his tongue tweaking my nub, his finger lingering on the outside of my asshole, pressing repeatedly. There was nowhere to hide in such a small space, and all of this was more than I had ever tried before.
I gasped and moaned as my bottom began to quake and start to run, and he still wouldn’t leave me alone, I had even started to flow and he was still enjoying the sucking. His hand came up and held me down powerfully, inhibiting my random writhing, my heart felt like it was being stung by ants, my skin reddened and itched, and I felt even more empty down there to the core.
“Let me go… put it in…” I began to moan and plead with him over and over as I expended all my energy to cooperate with him, my person was completely empty. As he stopped sucking, I felt even more empty, and I heard him unzip his zipper, and with a ‘plop’, the full length of his meaty pole entered my fragrant nest. “Ahhhh~”
I shushed out a section of my heart and got my strength back.
In the narrow space, he waded and jerked, the glass leaking with moisture from our passion. He slammed and pushed and swirled, doing whatever he wanted inside me. I didn’t know where I was, writhing, undulating, rubbing my breasts, “Aaah… aaah…” as everything was lost in our final hysterical cries. I knew that I could only feel this way with him in this life.
After a long break, it was evening, I told him I was hungry again, so he took me to eat hot pot. In the reflection of the charcoal fire, his bright eyes did not leave me, he said to me: “You are so beautiful!” He picked me up in the private room and we danced lightly, body to body, face to face, wishing the night would never end.
I started acting like a fool, always smiling. I told him about all the boyfriends I’ve had since he left. He’s sour, I tell him I don’t feel anything with them, nothing over the top, and he laughs. He wants to tell me about all the women he’s had, I don’t listen and just hope I’m the last one. He told me that actually the first time we met, he was under the car and I was in the car, he had seen me and vowed to pursue me. He also whispered to me that I had a narrow, tight bend there.
Memories of First Love (3)
We then had such a happy life, he got a random buddy to set me up with a job, and I had a dab and a paycheck that went all the way to hiring coworkers. My life consisted entirely of him and we literally had fun and made love like children. Those were the days when my bottom was always wet, my breasts were always up, we tore up countless clothes, and the room was littered with our marks.
But there is more to life than just flirting, he has to be busy with his business, and I can’t take my job too lightly, so we started living a normal life, with me working from 9 to 5, and him socializing even more, sometimes coming home very late. But we didn’t have any fights about it. When he was away, I practiced yuga at home, learned English, flower arrangement, and never felt lonely. My body started to get stronger, my face started to look rosy, and everyone knew I was in love.
The only drawback is that sometimes he is very tired at work, and I want him so much, I like monkeys climbing poles like churning in his body, I clamped his legs, up and down rubbing their own deltas, I have a vague feeling but it is always not enough. He is, often pat my back, softly teasing me, but there is no action, I had to resent the night. After a long time, I’m not good always mo him, but my need is so strong. I began to learn to masturbate, he his home used to store a lot of pornography, in his absence when I look. Beginning to see just simply look, can feel the wetness of the bottom, will sit on the sofa rubbing things; later more feel hungry, simply learn to masturbate.
Usually I will start to act after the feeling of wetness down there, I will take off all my clothes and sit with my legs spread out in front of the mirror, I can see my pussy lips and reddish nucleus very clearly, I always start to stroke them from the bottom to the top, and if they are not wet enough, I will dab them with some spit and rub them up and down on the outside of my pussy. The force should be just right, too light no reaction, too heavy uncomfortable, and then slowly began to feel tingling, like water from the root of the thighs in a radial upward spread. At this point I would start to attack my nucleus, rubbing it round and round at my vitals, so the sensations would become more intense, I would start to scream involuntarily, my ducts would keep contracting, and the wetness would spill outward along my labia, and then I wouldn’t be able to control it all any more, and I’d curl up, and let my bottom pulsate and flow.
Afterward, my pleasure was almost higher than with him, and I would even feel my uterus jumping and aching. So our only conflict was gone, occasionally we would have a few arguments, I would cajole him, he would let me, and it would all go away.
We started talking about marriage, he had cut off sexual relations with all other women since he had me, he said he wanted a child, he wanted me on a first name basis, and of course I threw my hands up in the air. We began to prepare for the wedding, I quit my job, he bought me a car, every day I drove to contact all the programs, he was very dignified, he said he wanted to give me a fairy tale wedding. Then we started picking out wedding dresses and taking wedding pictures, my whole body was happy for the event, every place we went attracted envious and jealous stares, I was enjoying it all in my heart.
This night, he bought me the blue maxi dress, being so deeply low in the back that you could almost see the tops of my buttocks, and the maxi dress was forked up high on the side to the waist, for which he fitted me with dangling spaghetti strapped panties, the panties were just an embellishment, with a tiny little piece in the front covering just half of my hair, and in the back it was just a string across my buttock cleavage. He wouldn’t let me wear a bra because of the low opening in the back, but fortunately my breasts, being well cared for, were always erect and didn’t need a bra to support or shape them, but my nipples would peek through during the action.
He always had good taste, but I just thought it was too sexy. He said it didn’t matter, he was with me tonight and wasn’t afraid to eat tofu. He said he was taking me to meet someone tonight, someone he would be grateful to for the rest of his life, and he said he wanted to keep it a secret, and that I would know who it was when he met me. I thought it was his family, we rarely talk about our respective families, we are both used to being out on our own and our families have become very faded.
In the evening I put up my hair and cleaned it up properly, and in the light of the house, he complimented me from the bottom of his heart, “You’re so beautiful!”
There wasn’t a moment on the road when his hands were honest. We asked the driver to take us there because we were afraid of drinking. His hands reached across my back as if he was holding me, but in fact he was already inside grasping my breasts and commenting in my ear, “They’re really big and firm, and so soft!” As if never touched. I was sitting on the coverlet to prevent the driver from seeing, but my nipples began to stand up.
I was starting to get wet down there, his hand came in through the split in my bottom skirt, through my stockings his hand moved up the inside of my thighs, he stopped at my privates and pushed up against it, both of our breaths were starting to catch. I whispered a warning for him to stop, the driver was already paying attention to us. He coughed his cane and sat upright. My nipples were so obvious through my shirt.
There was already a man waiting for us in the small private room of the restaurant, very enthusiastic, middle-aged, slightly shaven, a bit fat, he was the person I never wanted to see again in my life – my original boss. The boss was slightly flabbergasted when he saw me. It seemed that he didn’t know that he was meeting with me, and that he had arranged everything.
The boss’s eyes lingered on my chest for a moment, followed by a very normal expression : “Future sibling.” We chilled out, the happiest person was him, he said he got me back because of the boss, I have been casually dealing with them. They drank a lot of wine, their speech began to be unclear, the boss of a glass of wine spilled all over my lap.
They were cheerful and happy as I hurried to the restroom and cleaned up.
When I came back, the door of the private room was hidden, I heard the boss’s drunken voice: “Brother, you actually managed to get that slut, you’re good at what you do, but also rely on your youth and strength. That bitch can be a lot of water, dry, face does not change color heart does not jump, still talk to you about work. I’ve tried. Hey, I’ve tried! Fuck, I’m 50 and I feel it with her. Not enough fucking, pity, pity!” My heart was sinking.
“Bro, honestly, this kind of girl, can play around, not to tie yourself up for life. I’m drunk, I’m talking nonsense, feel free to listen.” There was silence.
I pushed the door open and walked in as if nothing had happened, and I saw his bright eyes, so unfamiliar.
All of us continued to be merry and mingle. Finally it was late at night and we had to go back to our respective homes, I dragged him down the street, I refused to take the car. I took the strength of my drink and made my way down the street, doing all sorts of tantalizing poses, and he was the only one watching, he had no expression on his face, he just stayed with me.
“Am I beautiful?” , “Do you want me?” I asked with abandon.
He walked quickly to me, grabbed my shoulder very hard, low voice: “You’re drunk, let’s go home!” I really do not want to go home, I am afraid he will ask me about the past, I just once, that time in his bright eyes above, in his picture. I couldn’t resist him and went home.
“Will you go with me tomorrow to pick up my wedding dress? I altered it a little.”
“You’re on your own. I’m busy, if I don’t get it right, I’ll change it again, there’s no rush anyway.” I understand what he means, did not pursue the question. Many things are not asked clearly can solve the problem, the heart of the realization is the answer, why both sides to get to the face all broken it!
He didn’t speak again, his eyes no longer familiar. This night he is wrapped far away on the other side of the bed. I hear his even breathing, I go around to his side of the bed, I stroke his hair, his eyes, his nose, his lips. I call out to him softly, there is no movement, and I can clearly see the crystals at the corners of his eyes. So I stepped back, my heart began to swell as if all the veins began to fill my chest, I felt the cold air rise from my heart and I knew : the dream was awake!
Waiting until my whole body is cold, I began to pack things, I only took the things I brought when I came, those cheap goods have long been packed in a small bag ready to throw away, I still picked up a blue dress to wear, leaving all the keys, I took the Kitty cat he gave me, and the small bag I came, out of the door. As the door closed, I heard his voice, a hesitant voice: “Don’t go.” The door had closed, and I never had the key to go back.
I have never asked him for money, and every time I buy something, I always put it in his name. He opened an account for me, I returned: “I have no money, you have to support me for life.” He was in the process of transferring our house to my name, but I was too lazy to sign the papers. So when I walked out that door, I only had 500 dollars on me.
I went to a drinking friend’s house, I used to invite her to dinner, she agreed to take me in for a few days, I hit the ground running in her house. The next day, I found her for sale, through the makeshift , I heard her obscene screams, I heard “plop, plop” penetration sound, I heard the man’s rude yells. She took a lot a night, sometimes two at the same time, from the shadow of the sub, I can clearly see two men, one on top of the other, from her pussy, her asshole thrusting hard, she screamed, satisfied.
I saw the delusions of grandeur of the men after they had spent the money, they beat him, they pinched him, they took different things and shoved them in him, from the front, from the back. They were willing to listen to her screams, they were willing to listen to her moans for mercy, they shoved their meat sticks into her mouth, they forced her to drink semen…
I was shocked, I could hardly sleep with all the different sounds, I started to wriggle in my little place, I felt the wetness down there, I felt the emptiness down there, I started to buckle myself, I found a bottle of glue and plunged, plunged, plunged, plunged, but I couldn’t get enough of it like a madman, so I started to plunged my behind, and it hurt so much! It hurt so much that I was so happy, it hurt so much that I could forget the pain in my heart.
I stubbornly thrust the bottle inwards, the pain diminished and was replaced by a feeling of fullness, I began to move the bottle, I felt my asshole already getting wet, I felt the bottle squeezing me where it passed through, and finally I leaked, leaked it all, uncontrollably, I lusted, I gasped, I soaked my pajamas with sweat.
The “swish” pulled open, she leaned against the wall, smiling at me, I do not have the strength to say anything else, looked at her, closed his eyes and went to sleep.
“You come out and do it too! Conditions are good, charge more.” She advised me the next morning.
“I don’t want to do it, it’s no fun!”
“Cuffed, pretend what big ah, screaming as if three years have not seen a man.”
I didn’t say another word, after all, I was begging her.
In the evening, she was free and came over to talk to me. “No guests today?” I asked her. “This also has a spectrum, catch dry a dead, no more idle a dead, how do you want to curse.”
She fluffed her hair and looked at me, I only had a nightgown on, empty underneath, which was more than enough for me to wear, and I’d always been a first class sleeper and efficient. “You have a great body, big tits and a high ass.” Said even reached out to touch my breasts, I dodged a little, her face sank again: “Less chastity!” She tends to come up again, simply unbuttoned my coat, originally I only buttoned two, and not too good to avoid her, struggling to twist down, buckle on all open.
She touched me with her cold hands, “It’s even bigger than it looks with clothes on.” I pushed her away, “You girl! Don’t pretend, and didn’t let you sell men, just let me touch can’t, don’t say eat this, live here, you go on the street, you don’t do it also let people sell.” She continued to brazenly come up and started sucking my nipples, her cold hands traced down my abdomen, stopping at my private parts and starting to move.
After all, it was a woman who knew best about women’s weaknesses. Her tongue swirled up and down the sides of my nipples, occasionally nibbling gently with her teeth and carving into the centers, moving her teeth from side to side as I felt my breasts begin to swell and my nipples had stood up. It was extremely natural for her to place her hand right on my most vulnerable nub and rub it, both fingers split my pussy lips to the sides from the center, leaving my hole completely bare, I couldn’t help but spread my tightly closed legs apart and she split them even more vigorously to the hilt, I slowly laid back down and began to enjoy her kneading and rubbing, and if it weren’t for the fact that her hands were cold, I would have almost thought that it was him at my side.
Her cold body pressed up against it, she rubbed her tits back and forth with mine, she pulled my hand over her pussy, she parted her pussy lips herself, she slipped all three of my fingers in at once, it was warm inside but already loose, she grunted and ate it, moving herself over my hand. “Those fools, small as a turnip head, picking at my mother every time.” She slipped her own finger into her asshole and she sucked in her breath, enjoying it.
I was being ridden underneath her, with one hand having to support his weight. Seeing her contented face, feeling the wetness and warmth inside her, I began to dare the emptiness below me, my legs wide apart, my pussy lips parted so that no flow of air could go straight to my cave, I began to squirm as she held me down, still enjoying herself.
Now I desperately want someone to pinch me, choke me, bite me.
Finally she went limp and sweaty on top of me.
She walked out and the sound of a shower came from the bathroom. All my sensations were still present, but I had no strength left to fix myself. I maintained my position with all fours open and open, and she came in and saw me and smiled understandingly. She took a black rod from her drawer, made to look like a man’s genitals, pushed on the batteries, she dabbed on some lubricant and stabbed it straight into my open portal, the cold and lifeless implement took over and I went cold.
She didn’t stop gently and flipped the switch and the thing started to vibrate, she kept pushing it into me and kept churning it up and down, I felt satisfied and felt all the way up against it, and down it went and I started to flow. She saw me squirming and heard me moaning seeming very satisfied, she tied it to my leg and left it running alone, she went and fetched another, lubed it up, and without consulting me, plunged it all the way into my asshole. I was all full up and down, they were pushing against each other in my belly, my whole body was sweating and I was starting to feel weak.
“Stop, I can’t, please…” I started begging her, I was no longer feeling any pleasure, I just felt those two things were about to suck all my spirit out of me. I twisted and turned, trying to get rid of them, but she thought I was in the middle of a sensation, instead she pushed them deeper, stirred them… I finally lost all feeling.
The next day I woke up with aches and pains all over my body, and I didn’t even have the strength to cry without someone by my side. Carrying my bag, I left her house, ate a full meal in a small restaurant, and walked into a hair salon.
“Give me the shortest kind of cut.”
“Miss, what a pity to cut such good hair!”
When I exited the salon, I was surprised to feel a little light in the head, cold from the wind, and my hair was only very short, and because it was so short, each strand stood on end.
Buying a newspaper, I sat down at a fast food restaurant and flipped through the job starts. I’d wasted so much of the year since graduation that there were hardly any jobs I could fit into. There was one in the corner that said it was looking for a translator and secretary to work in Africa under any conditions. So I walked into a dilapidated building, the manager received me very warmly: “to Africa, no one is willing, and we can not give too high income, no one has been to fill this gap. The original was a man, but he ran away! Miss, would you like to go to Africa?”
I showed him all my diplomas: “I can work anywhere as long as it’s a legitimate job.”
“Nice homework young lady, why don’t you find a big company to work for locally? Good treatment, good conditions.”
“I want to create my own business.” I boasted against my will.
“Okay, you’re accepted, salary USD400, 50% of outside earnings turned over to the company, traveling expenses covered by the company.”
“I’d like to start with a month’s paycheck.” I whispered.
The manager was flabbergasted: “This, let’s borrow yours for half a month first.” I started to get busy with my passport and work permit. The manager is very experienced in handling the procedures for leaving the country, two weeks later, I took my small bag, USD50, and my Kitty cat, boarded the plane, transferred twice before I arrived at my destination. Airports are all brownish-black skin color, white teeth, fox smell strong African, I to calm up, without all the pressure.
Outside the airport, the only person left at the corporate office picked me up with a sign held high. There was a look of disdain and surprise at the sight of my few and far between bags and clutching a toy.
“So here comes such a dainty young lady ah, the fax boasts you like a perfect man, how is it, how long do you plan to work?” He said nonchalantly, lifted my small bag and led me outside. It was dark outside and the smell of black people was spreading everywhere. He drove a BMW to pick me up and the car drove out of the airport into the vast darkness.
He kept introducing me to the local situation, the office, the company’s main business, and finally said, “You are a woman and I am a man, so to avoid accidents, I am not a saint, I will arrange for you to stay at the health station, which is a Chinese-aided health station with two female nurses. It’s also close to the office.”
Dropping me off at the health station and handing me over to the nurse, he drove off, “I’ll pick you up in the morning for work.” I had barely slept due to jet lag and heard him outside fighting with two nurses and walked out, “Let’s go!”
He had no more to say.
The roads are deserted, and the negroes live in houses tied up with white iron, and stained.
We didn’t drive for a while, we started to go up the hill, and the scenery started to look pretty in all directions, more greenery appeared in front of me, the flowers were trying hard to bloom and put out the maximum amount of color, the red and purple ones were extremely colorful, and the color seemed to be able to drip off the petals of the flowers. The houses also began to look beautiful, a three-story house standing in the middle of a large garden. “This is the original colonial settlement, now most of them live with white people, ambassadors and rich locals.”
He noticed my surprise: “Around the corner is our office and residence, there used to be a lot of people, but they all left.” He said, not without sadness.
Our office is not big, the yard is small enough to park two cars. Two floors, office downstairs, bedrooms upstairs, dining room, kitchen, bathrooms, everywhere is clean and tidy, and the grass in the garden can be seen to be mowed regularly. “Labor is cheap here, so the office hires blacks to clean the rooms and the garden.”
“Well, here’s the situation, here’s your desk, office supplies. Did you bring your car book, go do a paperwork tomorrow, you drive that white car!” Yu my new life began.
I surprisingly began to like this place, the folk style is so pure , the air has no dirt leakage, although the black people s work efficiency is really bad, but they all have a good temper. I became friends with the black woman who cleaned up the room, and I began to learn their native language. I was tanned by the African sun and my skin was dry. In this primitive place, I forgot all my desires. Besides, my work was very busy, traveling to different departments and companies every day with endless phone calls.
I’ve been working with Old Fei, as I call him, for almost 10 years. He came here right after he graduated from college and is 8 years older than me. Old Fei and I usually talk very little, I can only meet him in the afternoon every day, the rest of the time we are busy with our own business, and we have a meeting once a week to summarize and set up the work.
His opinion of me began to change, and before I knew it I had been there for 2 years. I gained a lot of weight, I didn’t have anything to eat in Africa, I had a craving, and I ate a lot of butter. With my black and brown skin, I was never the same again. The clothes I brought with me were all unwearable, so I went to buy local clothes, and I learned to make my own clothes from the black woman. I learned to make my own clothes from the black woman, but the old man was always sarcastic.
“If you lose weight, you can wear the original!”
“Can’t you put on some sunscreen, you’re getting pot black.”
“You’re the only one who can make this dress, who wears it?”
Every time I whistled, I would say, “I don’t care if I don’t hurt you!” I learned a lot of boys’ shortcomings, I can whistle, spit, and curse, my heart has become bigger, my temper has become bigger, and often I would point my nose at Old Fei and curse him. Old Fei has taken me for a man.
“Why do you always wear blue? Dark skin doesn’t look good in blue!” He came over to gaslight me again, and my heart suddenly twitched, I hadn’t thought about the old days again for so long I thought I’d forgotten about them. But then Old Fei’s words pulled me back in.
“I’d love to.” I barely managed to hide it as I stood up and drove back to the health station.
We never mentioned the clothes again and I continued to wear my blue color. The two nurses’ contracts expired and they had to go back to their home countries, and a new male nurse came to replace them at the health station.
“You’d better live with me back in the office, I think I’m still stronger than him.” The first time I saw a male nurse, the old nonpareil picked me up, “But it doesn’t matter if you don’t pick me up, you’re as strong as a man, who wants you!” In the office he began to taste on again.
At night I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, I did put on weight, my belly was starting to pop out, my thighs were obviously thicker than before, my arms were thicker, and I was even darker. My hair was always cut short when it first grew out. I really looked like a boy.
Living with the old Africa, more and more casual, I began to wear only a nightgown at night in the entire second floor of the wandering, he is not surprised, often pat my ass: “good fat bitch.”
Old Africa to return home on vacation, he has not been home for three years, when he left he solemnly instructed me: “Do not go out alone at night, do not just let outsiders into the garden, lock the door, go out to do things carefully.”
I cried, and Old Fei’s low voice sounded like his voice from long ago. Old Fei, inexplicably, walked away.
After Old Africa left, the local natives began to riot; they grabbed guns, went around burning and looting, stopping vehicles, and killing white people. At first I went out to run errands, but after two days I no longer dared to go out. Luckily I had stocked up on supplies and food. I closed all the doors behind me, and I put bars on all the windows. At night I didn’t dare to turn on the lights for fear of attracting the natives. I couldn’t eat anything by myself, and the slightest noise outside made my heart beat.
I didn’t dare to go out for almost a month when the natives made a fuss. My body began to lose weight, but my face began to swell, and my eyes were afraid of the light. The grass in the garden hadn’t been tidied up for a long time, the room was dusty, and the black people hadn’t gone to work.
The door downstairs slammed and I could hear it very clearly, it had to be someone! I didn’t dare to make a sound, and hid in the cupboard of my room. The footsteps came up, went into Old Fei’s room, and came out running to my side. It won’t be Old Fei, he’s on vacation for three months, and it’s less than halfway through.
People came in, the sound of rummaging through things, and went out again. I didn’t dare move a muscle, take whatever you like, go away. I thought to myself as the person came back in and stopped in front of the cabinet. I could almost hear my heart beating. The first cupboard door opens, the second, now it’s mine again, I pick up the hanger, ready to fight for my life. Hurrah the door opened, I took the hanger and slammed it down, an agile figure dodged backward and snatched my hanger with one reach, and with another wrench I was pinned down.
“Help!” I cried out wildly. The movement stopped and I was helped to my feet, it was old Fei. I let out a cry as I hung around his neck, all my weight put on it.
Old Fei patted me: “No, no, you’re too heavy, I can’t hold on much longer.” “Come on, come on, not raped, why are you crying?” “You are crying so hard, why are you crying like a crow?” He teased me. He teased me, I didn’t care what he said, I just kept crying. He stopped teasing me and took me in his arms, gently rocking and soothing me. I was tired of crying, but I didn’t know how to end it, so I could only hang on his neck and sob.
He suddenly moved my face and kissed me deeply, and I responded to him in a state of shock. The old African clumsily unbuttoned my shirt and trembled as he touched my breasts. I almost went limp in his hands, how long ago was this. I helped him undo my bra, remove my panties, and he shuddered instead as I helped him put it in my heaven.
I asked him why he came back so quickly, “My family introduced me to someone, I was not as good as this fat black guy, so I fled back!” “You seem to have lost weight. You miss me, don’t you?”
I had lost a lot of weight, and I could barely fit into my old clothes anymore, but I was still so dark, and my skin began to glow thanks to the nourishment of Old Africa. Lao Fei asked me to marry him, he is already 35 years old, do not want to wait any longer. I hesitated, the heart is not solid: “I want to go back to the country, and then answer you.”
So I crossed the road back to my home country, and it’s been 3 years since I’ve been back. Passing through France, I had a good time satisfying my shopping cravings and bought a lot of clothes. I’m earning quite well now.
One step into the country’s chaotic airport, my heart was so solid. I reported back to the headquarters and stayed in the guest house they had arranged for me, as if I had no one to contact. After a reception, I stayed alone on the street, the weather in May was cozy. I walked into a public phone booth and dialed a familiar number, but it had changed completely.
I was so much more relaxed, this person in the world disappeared. Bars had been added to the roadside, their lights tempting passers-by. It would be boring to go back anyway, so I walked into a small storefront. The time is still early, there are not many people in the bar, I bypassed the table set in the center, came to the corner, there is a KITTY cat on the table, so I sat down and looked at the toy. A melancholic voice came to me from the stage: “Why are you gone, disappearing before my eyes, why do I still see your face in my dreams…” The lyrics were good for such a raw song.
WAITER poured me a JIN and I slowly drank it. There was a dark shadow over my head, and the singer sat across from me: “Miss, this is my table.” The world stopped for a second, I looked up and saw his bright eyes, and we stared at each other.
“You’ve changed.” We spoke in unison.
Leaving the bar, we walked down the street, his hand naturally resting on my waist, as before, I didn’t refuse. He pulled me on the corner of the street and he started kissing me, from my eyebrows, to my eyes, to my lips, his tongue started parting my lips, my teeth, probing my tongue.
With a sudden revulsion, I thought of Old Fei, Old Fei’s clumsy hands, his clumsy tongue, Old Fei’s honest face, Old Fei’s smirking eyes. I withdrew my reaction, he stopped moving, and we slowly separated.
I smiled at him and he smiled back, our years of entanglement over, our years of resentment over, our years of love over.
Walking around the corner, I told him I was getting married!
Walking to the end of the street, he told me he was divorced!
-End-