Eight Days and Seven Nights of Xiang Daughter’s Many Loves (1)

Collection, reposting: 1999

The Eight Days and Seven Nights of Xiang Daughter’s Many Loves (I)

“Ping Shui met, acquaintance is destiny, this night after the farewell, reunion do not know where; to wine and song, advise you do not ask false true, life is like a dream, but I hope to be long drunk do not wake up.

Passersby in a hurry, sooner or later, arch a goodbye, today and the autumn wind, yesterday’s yellow flowers in; the old road to the pavilion, and will be filled with bottles of gold, the next door to the family, care about his old dreams and new happiness.

Years like a knife, carefully carved you and me, his country as a dream, not to mention the emaciated face; since the gentleman, how many sad stories, love this hurt, why my heart is obsessed.

The boldness is like the wind, the blankness of this body is not afraid, the tenderness is like water, the light of this heart is not dependent on; if you know the voice, raise your glass to listen to my song, the heart with the bright moon, the injury is far away from the wandering.”

September 29, 1999, Shenzhen, the sky is clear.

I drove the car, Liu Fang sat beside me, Li Zhijian sat in the back, there weren’t a lot of cars on the airport highway, and after passing through the border checkpoint, my mood became extraordinarily relaxed. The sky in front of me is as clear and pure as the blue sky and white clouds in elementary school essays. National Day our company has a rare five-day vacation, I asked Liu Fang to go to Changsha to play, just graduated from the university when I worked there for a year, met some friends, time passes really fast, in the blink of an eye a few years have passed.

The greenbelt next to the highway sped by, the past slowly surfaced in my heart, the years rushed by, the sense of life’s absurdity is inescapable, I gently hummed this old song written years ago.

Liu Fang is also very excited, the two of us originally in the office of the first line of sales when we met, but not familiar with the beginning of this year, I transferred back to China, he also transferred back to the headquarters of the company’s training centers, we are all in Shenzhen, and have no girlfriends, often together after work, and gradually become familiar with.

He was four years older than me, but it wasn’t obvious; we were both the kind of people who appeared younger than we really were; I was tall and thin, he was robust and well-proportioned; I was cool and civilized, he was warm and cheerful, and on many occasions we both hit it off.

He is also a man of the past in the scene, thirty-one has no girlfriend, I know that he has a few fixed sexual partners in Shenzhen, he likes to talk, especially in front of the girl nonsense, no scruples, I like his character, just sometimes he picks up the girl grade is too low some. This vacation, a few of my college classmates, as well as best buddies, are at home with their girlfriends or wives, “idle is also idle”, I said to take him to Changsha to open up the world.

“I’m telling you,” Liu Fang excitedly snapped his baseball cap on his shaved head, “if I don’t see a pretty girl this time, I’m not done with you.”

I did not say anything, my hand gently touched him on the lower side, I do not want to be rude in front of my subordinates, Li Zhijian works in the department I supervise, graduated not long ago, hardworking and honest, I’m cultivating him, today he accompanied us to the airport, and then drove my car back to the company.

Liu Fang immediately understood what I meant, the year before when I was in the Beijing office, he was in the Hebei office, are the market in the smoke of a thousand hammered out, have seen human nature and officialdom in the darkest things, the ability to attack and defense are very strong.

Along the way Liu Fang did not mention the girl’s business, just constantly Kan securities business, I know that he speculated in the spare time stocks, do medium and long term, into  not bad.

When we arrived at the airport, I picked up my tennis racket and jumped out of the car with Liu Fang with our simple luggage.

“Drive slowly.” I handed the keys to Li Zhijian.

“Bye.” Li Zhijian turned to the driver’s side of the seat and said goodbye to both of us as he opened the door. He didn’t say much, no “have a good time” or “happy 4th of July” or anything like that, which I appreciated.

Turning back I saw Liu Fang standing tall, whitened jeans, wide sweatshirt, nine years short of forty, still leaping at the sight of a woman, the kind of man I admire all the same.

“Those rich Hong Kong women who call for ducks at the Fu Lin Hotel at night must all be particularly fond of you,” I said to Liu Fang with a smile as I walked towards the terminal.

Praised, Liu Fang got excited and started bragging to me about his bedside manner.

Since the opening of the new terminal in Shenzhen, the old terminal is only the flights of China Southern Airlines, so this side of the waiting for very few people, we changed boarding passes, in the huge floor-to-ceiling windows next to the seat, Liu Fang took a book from the bag, I flipped through the book, surprisingly, it is the “Reaffirmation of Capitalism”, I really can’t recall the year I read this kind of philosophical books, as if I have never read it.

I turned around in the terminal, did not see any pretty girls, stood in front of the window to watch the tarmac one plane after another in boredom. The plane was late, we waited for a long time, the sky is getting dark, I feel a little hungry, my stomach is not very good, last year when I was abroad when I lived alone, not big enough to take care of themselves, got the root of the stomach disease, sometimes good and sometimes bad.

“Do you want a pack?” I asked Liu Fang as I prepared to go buy instant noodles.

He shook his head and laughed, “You’re quite an interesting person, you’re hungry when it’s time, you’re full when you eat, you like to drink, and you get drunk when you drink.”

I went to the counter, bought a packet of “Master Kong” bubble, back when I passed the car selling books, looked at a few, there are a few new books are quite interesting, I bought a copy of Park Yang’s “Dark Night Wisdom Lights”, and a copy of Li Ao’s “Laughing Proudly for Fifty Years”.

A packet of hot instant noodles down, I feel a lot more solid, and Liu Fang have a chat blindly, two fashionably dressed girls walked past us, prominent figure, ordinary appearance.

“Well?” Liu Fang asked me with a squeeze.

“It’s not pretty.”

“I’ve noticed you’re very judgmental. Is it so important to be pretty?”

“As a human being, we still need to be strict with ourselves,” I took out my boarding pass and put the book back in my bag, “Of course, if they are willing to pay for it, they can also make it work.”

“In fact, you do not know,” Liu Fang sincerely looked at me and said: “and ugly women sex is more interesting.”

“Yeah?” I said lightly as I stood up and walked toward the line.

There were many people on the plane, and as soon as I sat down, I took out the China Civil Aviation magazine from the front of my seat and flipped through it, which has become an inevitable habit for me every time I fly since I stumbled upon a photo of her performance in it.

“I never sat next to a girl every fucking time I flew,” Liu complained to me: “God  sure, this time to a pretty girl.” Liu Fang sat next to me, the inside window seat is still empty.

“Looking for what?” Liu Fang asked curiously as he watched me flip through pages and pages of Civil Aviation of China.

“Nothing, pictures from my old girlfriend’s show.”

“You’re pretty sentimental, how many women have you slept with?”

“Can’t remember.”

“I have a hunch,” Liu Fang said confidently, “we’ll definitely get lucky this time.”

I looked up and smiled as a short, lean, odd-looking Cantonese man was walking calmly toward our seats while reading his boarding pass, and Liu Fang saw it too.

“Am I right, the orangutans are already here, can the peach blossoms be far behind?” Liu Fang said with a bitter smile.

The dilapidated airbus accelerated on the runway and took off, the airplane began to play the routine broadcast, I leaned my head against the back of the seat, closed my eyes and contemplated, and searched my memory as hard as I could for everything about Changsha. Too many things have happened over the years, and many people and events are strung together in my memory, and the hazy figures seem to be competing to be the first to tell me, and I intuitively feel that they are all lying, and then they push me around, and I open my mouth but can’t say anything.

The plane lurched for a while and turned a corner, I suddenly felt a light in front of my eyes, the figures scattered and disappeared, I saw myself clearly, wearing a loose pretty white jacket and jeans, smiling, walking in the sunny street, a girl led me into a lane, damp and dark, in the corner of the suit stood wooden me, the girl looked at the two of me standing together in surprise, tried to pull the younger me to spread legs I didn’t move, and she touched me again.

I opened my eyes and the air hostess was looking at me with a smile, “What would you like to drink, sir?”

I asked for a glass of mineral water and looked back at Liu Fang, both he and the orangutan were sleeping soundly, head to head.

Changsha is very close to Shenzhen, the actual flight time is less than an hour, the weather seems to be hotter than Shenzhen, I and Liu Fang with the flow of people off the plane, into the terminal, we do not have checked baggage, directly out of the door, buy tickets on the bus.

The bus was full of people, Liu Fang and I did not talk much, curiously looking out the window at the unfamiliar scenery, all the way to the lights bright and dark, downtown to the airport of the highway has been repaired, and occasionally see the side of the road a few years of unchanged familiar scenery, so that my memories are getting more and more clear, I am really once again in Changsha, this let me love to hate the city.

I first came to Changsha in 1994, at the age of twenty-two, shortly after graduating from university, I was hired by a French company and sent to work in Changsha for a year, until I resigned and went to the Middle East. The school I went to was a science and engineering college in Beijing that only became popular in the 1990s, and I studied computer science. I spent most of my time in college playing soccer and drinking, singing and playing cards, or staying up late in the computer room to play “Three Kingdoms,” so my knowledge of women was very shallow, and I was almost blank in this area when I was sent to Changsha.

Changsha is a very strange city, beautiful girls all over the street, broken cab in the narrow road drilling around, cheap prices, every night after twelve o’clock the streets are bustling, restaurants, dance halls, nightclubs are overcrowded, I was easily captured by the city. I hang out with my buddies from a few other foreign companies in Changsha, and I keep meeting new girls every day, drinking, dancing, and playing cards with them. Su Ya, Feng Zhe, Zheng Fei, Xie Hui, Li Qing were all met at that time, these girls and I have no male and female relationship, we just play together, say all kinds of yellow jokes, sometimes go to eat Guizhou beer duck in the rain, and sometimes go to eat snails at Zhongshan Road in the middle of the night after the game of poker, and then later I met Xu Bing Bing, and we began to cohabitate.

Bingbing Xu was still a little girl at that time, which is one thing I am still thankful for, which makes me still keep a hint of fantasy about the relationship even after the degradation, we are not completely because of money, sex, or other messy things together, more or less a little bit of feelings.

In early ninety-five I and Xu Bingbing naturally came to an end, the lack of freshness of life and seek excitement of the original intention of the obvious contradiction, we are very peacefully broke up, and then I met Li He. At that time Li Huo should be considered a beautiful woman, long hair, shoulder-length, plump body, features are not bad, from the beginning she is a very mature person. I hardly knew anything about her past, but it didn’t matter, when I was getting tired of my gaming career in Changsha coming and going, being able to have a quiet dinner at home was quite appealing. Though she was never really my type, and to be honest, I liked the kind of girl with a clean-cut face, long flowing hair, and a slight shyness that twenty years of traditional education hadn’t completely faded away, but was just temporarily masked by the pomp and circumstance of being in the world for the first time.

A weekend in 1995, a boring afternoon, I and a few friends to “wild horse” concert hall to play, where the seats are very low, they are on the stage in the dashing high song, I changed around how to sit uncomfortable, dim lights, that moment I suddenly doubt where I am. I recalled when I was a child watching the “Romance of the Three Kingdoms” when it comes to Liu Bei in the Liu watch that the time of the fence, one day suddenly found himself flabby waist, tears of emotion, want to think of the years and Guanzhang brothers to kill the four seas, the time of the war, the body of the body where there will be more than the rest of the fat it, and now the ambition has not been chip, and meticulously Ann, nothing to do, how do not let the heroes and heroes strangled Hao Lai.

After the song that day, I silently returned home, silently thought for three days, submitted a resignation report, my salary at that time was twelve thousand dollars a month, quite a lot of students know that I resigned are quite surprised.

I returned to Beijing after a moment of no plans, went to the Middle East, in fact, I was in my heart just wanted to escape that city, I was suddenly filled with disgust for that kind of almost lewd, night and day life.

Before I left Changsha I did a very excessive thing, still think of Li He still have apologized to Li He, at that time I rented a house, there are a few thousand dollars deposit, before I left Li He and I was living together, I left Changsha when the house back, retrieve the deposit. I didn’t know what my next plan was, so I had to cherish every penny, I didn’t think too much about Li He, we met in passing, the edge of the end is scattered, each other to each other would have no responsibility, just Li He moved that day under a light rain, I’m going to leave the next day, she temporarily moved to her friend Leng Jia’s home to live, looking at the rain she was busy and uncomplaining body, I think! I feel that I am sometimes quite cold.

Before I left for the airport at noon, the two of us ate on the second floor of the Giant Continental Hotel. There weren’t many people, and both of us were silent, occasionally saying one or two unrelated things. after eating, I asked for two more drinks and sipped them slowly.

“Will you come to Changsha again?” Li Huo asked me in a soft voice.

“It will come.” I smiled out of habit, it was hard to tell what kind of feeling it was, a little lingering and a little thankful, I mean for the city.

Time is almost up, I looked at Li Ho, very calmly and seriously said a long thought words: “Many people use the hardships of life as an excuse for their own degradation, but not as a motivation to strive for improvement.”

Li He and I just met when a friend told me that she was in the “Son of Heaven” concert hall has done a period of “sit Taiwan” Miss, I have never known whether it is true or not, and never thought to confirm.

Li Ho finally cried, in the time I’ve known her, from start to finish she’s been very mature, really, if you understand the true meaning of maturity, sometimes I don’t even know what the hell she’s thinking, I just know that her family is very bad, her father found another woman a long time ago and left, leaving her and her mother in Changsha.

After returning to Beijing, a lot of things have changed, and life comes in waves, not allowing one to take a break.

I have been to the desert in the Middle East, and back to Beijing, opened a small store selling computers, and closed down, feelings and career experience continues to accumulate, and fruitless, in 1996, that is, my natal year, happened a thing that made me bitter, so that I almost completely give up on the relationship, so I looked for a job, and running around the major cities in China, between the ideal and the reality of the endeavor to frame the I have been trying to build a bridge between ideal and reality until today.

Li He and I have been in contact for the past few years, and I mentioned that I was slightly sorry for her when I first left Changsha, an apology that deepened with her consistent concern and lack of complaint for me, and gradually settled into a special friendship. Over the past four years, we would talk to each other on the phone from time to time, sometimes only once every six months, sometimes a phone call every week, there are some legendary stories in my life, however, the feeling of being in the middle of it is far from as romantic as recalling it afterward, when I woke up in an unfamiliar city, or when I was frustrated and even began to doubt the meaning of the struggle in my life, I would sometimes think of Li Huo, as if remembering the few life and death friendships I had in college, I knew that Li Huo was a good friend, and I knew that she was a good friend. When I wake up in a strange city, or when I am frustrated or even start to doubt the meaning of my life’s struggle, I sometimes think of Li He, just like I think of my friends in college.

Li Huo these years have had a very bad time, she opened a small restaurant, lost, worked, very uninteresting kind, and now opened a small clothing store. Last month I was in Shenzhen when she went once, into the goods, I hurried to see her side, we are old, the passion between men and women has long been gone. I gave her two thousand dollars, with my current reality and degradation, without asking for anything in return to help another several years to see, to whom there is also no physical desire for a woman, I can not think of any reason other than friendship. And the friendship of two people in completely different worlds was created, I think, on the basis that she was nice to me, which is to say, I always thought she was nice to me, deep down.

“Li Ho, you should get a boyfriend.” Once on the phone, I said to her seriously.

“There’s no right yah.” Her voice was always soft.

“Can’t ask for too much, just find someone with a good heart among the rich.”

“Can’t find one! Besides, I don’t like boys from Changsha.”

“Are you pregnant?” I suddenly felt something: “I go to Changsha to stay at your place convenient? It’s just me and my coworker.”

“Convenient, what’s not convenient, but there’s only one bed, and one person will have to sleep on the couch or hit the floor.”

“That’s okay.”

After leaving Changsha, I still feel inexplicably close to Changsha girls whenever I meet them in other places. That year, I had a decent girlfriend studying French at Wuhan University, whose name was Zhang Qing, and whose hometown was Changsha, but then she went to Canada, and that was the end of it. And Lin Mei, I met in Beijing in 1997, when Feng Zhe in Beijing Institute of Foreign Languages to study English, they were in Changsha amateur modeling team also broke up, everyone went their own way, Li Qing evening a big money, said the rest of his life do not have to worry about it. Zheng Fei has a good relationship with some old men and is speculating in stocks, and Xie Hui is married to a Taiwanese businessman. In that circle, Feng Zhe is the most straightforward person, she had a sudden idea, ran to Beijing Foreign Language Institute to study, began to accept the culture outside Changsha, she and I became very good friends, Lin Mei is to Beijing to take the clothing college modeling she introduced us to each other.

To this day, I have always thought that Lin Mei is a very good girl, perhaps should be said to be a woman, beautiful and temperament, she had won a Hunan modeling contest champion, in Changsha, the most red when the wind to wind, rain to rain, such a woman should be very easy to find a rich and powerful people to sit and enjoy the glory, but she suddenly gave up all the original, to take out of the study, perhaps too smart it! The smart ones are always destined to suffer more.

She was admitted to the Shanghai China Textile University of fashion design and modeling performance professional, but unfortunately her figure is not particularly high, probably only one meter seven two it, otherwise the future should be better, we both fell in love at first sight in Beijing and passed by, because each other are very clear that the pursuit of life is far from being realized, there is no qualification for settling down, but also she is such a great woman will always give a man a strong sense of pressure, in any case, I still like her very much and respect the confidante. In any case, I still like her very much, but also respect this confidante. I will always remember a sentence in a long letter she wrote to me: “True betrayal happens all the time, how often we are confident in ourselves, how often we are disappointed in ourselves.”

Changsha’s car drivers are driving fiercely, we took this bus although worn out, still in the road east super west turn, I was swaying with the car, while hesitating to call who first, according to the reason is that should be the first to Li Huo, but I worry that as soon as I see her will be with her all the time, and then come out to play is inconvenient, we are here to have fun this time, and I and Liu Fang is not a rule-abiding person. Then again, to be honest, the current Li He is a lot of friend for me, and very little woman.

“Which one to call first?” I asked Liu Fang.

“You contacted two groups, didn’t you? Which one is easy to handle?” Getting it done meant getting laid in Liu Fang’s opinion.

I looked at Liu Fang, knowing that he is still trapped in the Shenzhen mode of thinking has not turned around, this is also not my few words can do, or let him feel in Changsha.

“I’m afraid it’s not what you think,” I said: “I’m sure you’ll see a pretty girl, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to get laid.” Li Huo’s good friend Leng Jia and Zheng Fei in the set of Chen Shan are the beauty of the beauty.

At that moment my phone rang and I looked at the number, “It’s Zheng Fei.” I said to Liu Fang.

A few years ago I met Zheng Fei in Changsha, but at that time not too familiar with their circle of friends and the German company’s buddies to play together, I remember playing cards twice in her house, and then saw her again in Beijing, she went to do the visa, looking for Feng Zhe, I invited them to have a meal, I do not know why, it seems that she has always been very interested in leaving the country, in this regard I am an insider, whether it is from the bottom of the spending money to get out of the country or sent by the state or large enterprises to do official work, or like my classmates to study abroad and immigration from developed countries to developing countries, South America, Europe, America and the Middle East, I have much experience. I am an expert in this field, whether it is from the lowest level to spend money to mix out, or sent by the state or large enterprises to do official work, or like my classmates to do study abroad and immigrants, from the developed countries to developing countries, South Asia, Africa, Europe, America, the Middle East, I have a lot of experience.

At that time, I also just finished the Canadian immigration application, she asked me a lot of questions, I know everything, so the relationship is quite good, not to mention that at that time I was working as a salesman, decent driving a car in Beijing to eat, drink and have fun, but unfortunately she was rejected that time, and did not go out in the past few years, and now also still mixed in Changsha.

“Han Jiang, are we there yet?” Zheng Fei’s voice was kind and feminine, she was a very mature woman, Changsha seemed to have no immature women, usually after their third birthday, they started learning to cheat.

“Here we are, in the car, are you okay?” I replied politely.

“It’s fine, I’m just starving, am I waiting for you to eat.”

“Really? So righteous, let me treat you, where to meet?” It’s been so long since I’ve seen you, I guess it’s always right to be polite.

“Let’s go to Huatian,” Zheng Fei said the name of a hotel I was familiar with: “Are you in a cab, or on a bus?”

“The bus, it might be another half hour before we get into town.”

“I’ll see you at eight-thirty then, I’ll be waiting for you at Huatian.”

“Is Shan Chen around?” I asked naturally.

“I told her that she has something to do and will come over after dinner.” Zheng Fei snickered as if she had finally found out what my secret was.

Liu Fang and I got off the bus at the Civil Aviation Building in front of the train station, and stopped a cab on the road. Both of us dressed very casually this time out, with one person carrying a bag and a tennis racket on our backs, quite dashing. Liu Fang chewing gum, standing there carelessly, under the baseball cap is a rather handsome face, thick eyebrows and big eyes, a face of righteousness, I was surprised at the strong contrast between people’s appearance and their hearts, just like my appearance of weakness and inner strength and coldness.

“The show has begun.” I spit the gum in my mouth on the ground without any public decency and smiled at Liu Fang.

Huatian is an earlier and more famous five-star hotel in Changsha, the lobby is brilliantly lit, Liu Fang and I walked into the food court on the first floor, Zheng Fei appeared with a smile. She didn’t look like she had changed much from the last time we met, except that her makeup was a bit thicker, and her bright red lips, contrasting with her snow-white skin, created a very exciting and sexy look. She also wore a sportswear, but still couldn’t hide her plump figure, we are all over, I just introduced her and Liu Fang to each other, and the two of them started to joke around recklessly, on the contrary, I had a little bit of unfamiliarity, and faintly chatted with Zheng Fei about a little bit of the past, this is my subconscious habit, when we meet after a long period of time, we always need to find the feeling first, in order to make clear the positioning of the two people’s relationship and the tone of the future contact.

Drink a cup of tea, the two of them went over to order something to eat, I lit a cigarette, leaning on the back of the chair, surveying the surrounding environment, the hall is relatively spacious, around the circle is around the flavors of the snacks, the guests themselves to take a single past the random order. Hall sitting in twos and threes with some guests, next to the table sat a foreigner, leisurely and authentic drinking tea, encountered my eyes, she looked at my tennis racket, made a “good” gesture, I laughed, I know that I am serious about laughing when quite friendly, but also full of confidence, which I have practiced many times in front of the mirror! This is the result of my many practice sessions in front of the mirror.

While we ate and chatted, Zheng Fei asked me about some things abroad, and then mentioned Li He, “I ran into her a few times,” Zheng Fei said: “She seems to have cut her hair.”

“Yeah,” I said, “she’s got a boyfriend.”

“Which one do you mean? She’s had several boyfriends.” Zheng Fei looked at me as if she was guessing what I really meant: “Are you two on good terms? Don’t you see your old lover this time?”

“Forget it, I lost my enthusiasm a long time ago, I’d like to meet Chen Shan, how is she?”

Chen Shan is from Shanghai, tall and sexy, white skin, very beautiful kind of girl, moved to Changsha a few years ago, she came to Shenzhen last year, Zheng Fei asked me to treat her to a meal, that time I went to South Africa the next day, there is no opportunity to produce any story with her, I have always been grudging.

“She’s quite well and is preparing for marriage.”

I ate a little bit of food can not eat, went out to Tan Jianjun made a phone call, I just graduated from college in Hong Kong, a company based in Handan paging station worked for three months, then Tan Jianjun is the director of the station, he was very good to me, and then I quit, back to Beijing to look for a job in the two months before the French company was accepted, Tan Jianjun still pay my salary, I’ve always remembered him this love.

In 1995, he worked on a communications project in Xi’an, another student and I went to help him with the project, without taking any money, and he was quite touched, and then we had exchanges from time to time, and he was very stable, and I learned a lot from him at the beginning, and now I still think he is a rare talent.

Tan Jianjun was really excited when he heard that I was in Changsha. We hadn’t been in touch for a long time since I arrived in Africa, and he first complained that I hadn’t called him earlier because he was going to go back to his hometown in Yiyang for the National Day tomorrow, and then decided to come over to see me right away.

I went back to my seat, Liu Fang and Zheng Fei chatting happily, I know he likes plump women, “women are impure,” Liu Fang is bragging about himself again: “I’m nine years short of forty years old, I’ve seen nothing!”

Zheng Fei and I are laughing, I secretly pondered in my heart Zheng Fei will not like Liu Fang, his strong body and vigorous face will always leave a good impression, but a talk feel all changed, thinking a little chaotic, sometimes I do not know whether he is really confused or fake confusion, that set of dealing with some of the little girls who have never seen the market can be, like Zheng Fei such a mature Changsha girls, you have to really mature than them they will convince you to go to bed with you. The first thing you need to do is to get a good deal of money to pay for the services of the company, and then you have to pay for the services of the company.

“You’re just too sentimental,” I complimented Liu Fang expressionlessly and loudly, “Your only flaw is that you’re too kind.”

Zheng Fei’s phone rang, she listened to a couple of sentences and hung up, stood up and waved to the door, I then saw Chen Shan walking towards us in a short red dress, when she sat down, I glanced sideways at Liu Fang, he was very focused, I was relieved, I promised to bring him to see a pretty girl, I couldn’t go back on my word.

Said a few words, I feel that this year Chen Shan has changed a lot, she often talks about business matters, intentionally or unintentionally, “this time is too busy,” she said seriously: “nine on the opening of the bidding, I just had dinner with the director of the infrastructure Wang.”

On the one hand, I was dumbfounded, on the other hand, I was also a bit emotional, back then when we were first involved in the business world is not the same, we went along with the topic of Chen Shan tea and chat.

“How big is the plate?” Liu Fang asked.

“There are more than twenty million, the entire renovation project,” Chen Shan said: “These days are really especially busy, next time you guys come to be sure to accompany you, this time is too unfortunate. Next year I may do an advertising company, Fukang in Hunan Province, the entire advertising agency, has talked about almost.”

I smiled and listened to their conversation, recalling the scene when I met with her last year, too long ago to remember, hurriedly one side, as if it didn’t say anything, but I still feel that she is absolutely different from last year, as a beautiful woman, it is normal to be a bit flirtatious or greedy for enjoyment, but if she still has a mercenary air that is a bit pedantic, I don’t know why she gives the impression that she lacks self-confidence, a beautiful I don’t know why she gives the impression of lack of confidence, beautiful women are usually not so obvious.

Reading people is not a good habit, but I can’t always change it, and sometimes I have a strange ability to read people and things, and often appreciate the essence of them without any basis.

After a while again, Tan Jianjun came over, he bought a Toyota cab head car, although not beautiful, the inside is still quite comfortable, air conditioning, stereo are quite good, Tan Jianjun and Liu Fang the same age, but looks much more mature, he is not tall, beautiful almost standard, very concerned about clothing.

We discussed for a while and decided to go to a newly opened place called “Red Sun”, but when we got there we realized that it was not yet open, so we turned around and went to “Phoenix”.

“The road next to the Phoenix is under construction, we circled around and parked in front of the entrance, which was almost full of people, the five of us found a table against the door and sat down, the powerful disco music was dizzying, and the dance floor in the corner was crowded with men and women.

“Han Jiang, what are you drinking?” Zheng Fei asked me.

“TEQUILA, how?” I have not come to this kind of place for a long time, nerves inexplicably excited, why not just drink alcohol, TEQUILA is “Lonchera”, Mexico produced a kind of alcohol, 40 degrees.

Chen Shan and Zheng Fei both clapped their hands, Tan Jianjun took out his cigarettes and gave each of us one, patted my shoulder and chatted with me, Zheng Fei asked for wine, and then asked for Seven Happiness, Salt, and Lemon, and poured five cups.

I didn’t mix it with seven, I squeezed a little lemon juice into the wine, wiped the rim of the glass with salt, took a coaster and put it over the glass, shook it, and “thumped” it on the table, the wine foamed up, I picked up the glass and drank it all, and I licked my lips as the acidic, strong flavor rushed into my mouth, and felt it was very pleasurable.

They also one by one row over to drink up the cup of wine, when it is Liu Fang’s turn, he does not drink, I know that he and I are the same amount of alcohol are not good, but I like to drink, he does not like to drink. “Give some face, big brother,” Chen Shan still forced Liu Fang to drink a cup.

At first, I and Tan Jianjun also serious chat for a while, Zheng Fei from time to time to open me and Chen Shan jokes, and then a bottle of wine quickly drank up, everyone is a little dizzy, originally Tan Jianjun’s alcohol is very good, but he seems to be the first time to drink this kind of wine, not quite accustomed to it, but also show a little drunkenness, Liu Fang leaned back in the chair, seemingly sleepy, Zheng Fei smoked cigarettes, and Chen Shan do not know what to say, Chen Shan While listening to her speech, while looking straight at me, I seriously looked at her, and found that her features are very beautiful, but beautiful very wooden.

I lit another cigarette, it seemed like there were countless people walking back and forth around me, I indulgently exhaled the smoke into the air in large gulps, deeply experiencing a kind of indulgent pleasure, the disco music crunched to a halt, and a lyrical old song rang out, I pulled Chen Shan’s hand and walked to the dance floor, gently encircling her waist, she hugged me, her head leaning against my shoulder, and I could feel her voluptuous breasts pressed against me, and I habitually brought my mouth to her ear and gently bit her, she moaned and squirmed in my arms, I felt my body was hot and gently pushed her away a little.

“I like you,” I looked at her beautiful eyes and asked: “thought about me?” In my heart, but I feel that I asked a very boring, a year ago, a brief encounter, what did not have time to happen, think of me is strange.

“Why didn’t you tell me last year?” Chen Shan still hugged me tightly.

Last year, last year when we met I was preparing to go to Africa, I don’t know if I can come back, would tell a girl I just met that I like her, that’s not sick, I suddenly feel sober.

“Why do you have to work so hard on your own?” I asked Chen Shan: “Nowadays, business is not good, especially for girls, unknowingly trapped, why not find a rich man to marry?”

“I don’t want to live like that,” said Chan San, stepping back and fixing her hair: “My parents divorced when I was three…”

The dance was over, I did not listen to or remember Chen Shan’s story, what does that have to do with me, the two of us walked back to our seats hand in hand, even though my body was being stimulated by alcohol, I still clearly felt a sense of relaxation being outside of the situation, and I liked that feeling.

I don’t know who ordered another beer on the table, but Liu Fang was already completely asleep, Tan Jianjun and Zheng Fei were talking, and sitting next to them was a woman I didn’t recognize, a very obviously pregnant woman.

“Han Jiang, this is my friend.” Zheng Fei introduced us.

“Why so careless?” I sat down with panache, talking and laughing.

“What ah, people have been married for a long time.” Zheng Fei said with a smile.

I went to the restroom, where the music is less loud, I washed my face in the mirror, and was surprised to find myself looking very spiritual, not a little haggard look, I used my hand to catch some water to rinse out my mouth, the cool water into my mouth, I suddenly felt a burst of heart, and ran inside and began to vomit, and I thought that when I looked in the mirror just now it must be a “flashback”.

I didn’t go straight back to my seat, I went outside to call Li He, her cell phone was turned off, I fixed my mind and flipped out Su Ya’s phone number, it went through, I told her I was in Changsha, asked her for Li He’s home phone number, she told me her phone number, and made small talk with me for a few more jokes.

I called Li Ho’s house and told her that I had arrived in Changsha, “Is it convenient to talk?” I asked lightly.

“Convenient, where are you?”

I told her that Tan had invited us to Phoenix to play and she knew that Tan and I were good and I didn’t mention Zheng Fei.

“So what’s your plan?” I understood when I heard her gentle question, but I still pretended to be confused and went straight to the point: “It’s too late, we don’t want to go looking for a hotel, can we stay at your place?”

“Leng Jia and her boyfriend are staying with me today.”

“Forget it then, I’m going to Tan’s, I’ll contact you tomorrow!”

“Then… okay, have fun.” Li Ho hung up the phone hastily.

I stood in the doorway, flabbergasted.

I walked back to my seat, they were almost done drinking, I sat for a while longer, smoked a couple of cigarettes, and felt a rush of alcohol, it had been a long time since I’d drank like this, and my body didn’t seem to be used to it for a while.

“Han Jiang, where are you going to stay at night?” Zheng Fei asked me.

“Is your place convenient?” I said : “It’s too late today, we’ll go to the hotel tomorrow.”

“No problem.” Zheng Fei said cheerfully.

Liu Fang woke up and began to flirt with Zheng Fei there, Chen Shan seems to be drunk, sitting there do not talk much, I also do not talk much, drinking beer to themselves, in fact, my alcohol is very poor, not long after I feel the face burns, the head is big, the noisy sound gradually far away, reached a kind of thing I forget the realm of the two, when I am sober again, they are helping me to get on the car.

“Where’s Chan-San?” I muttered.

“She’s drunk and went back first.” Zheng Fei said as she helped me.

“Right.” I remembered, it seemed like she was getting married.

I saw Tan Jianjun dizzily climbed into the driver’s seat, turn on the ignition, turn on the lights, gear, release the handbrake, reverse, “when”, the car crashed into the back of a parked car. I was feeling funny, Zheng Fei nervously said to Tan Jianjun: “No need to stop, drive away.” Tan Jianjun did not panic, shift gears, step on the gas pedal, the car stirred up a cloud of dust, and drove to the main road, I turned around and saw a security guard is walking towards the car that was hit by the chaotic noise.

“Where is this going?” I asked in a daze.

“My home ah, Han Jiang, it’s good to be home ah, Han Jiang.” Zheng Fei comforted me.

I leaned into her, confused as to why this woman was being so nice to me.

Tan Jianjun sent the three of us to the downstairs of Zheng Fei’s house and left, we carried our luggage up to the third floor, Zheng Fei bought a very small house on her own, a room with a very small hall, there is only a double bed, I lay on the bed for a while, I felt uncomfortable, so I went to the restroom to vomit, Zheng Fei came over to help me gently pounded my back, and I suddenly realized that I was only wearing underwear, and I don’t know when she helped me to take off the outer clothes.

I washed my face and walked back to my room, Liu Fang was lying on the sofa already asleep, the air conditioner was on in the room, I collapsed on the bed and felt a little bit better, Zheng Fei was lying beside me, she had changed her pajamas.

I reached out and placed my hand on hers, she didn’t respond, I rolled over and placed my leg in her lap, she pushed my leg away and sat up, looking at me with concern.

“What’s wrong? Han Jiang, not feeling well?”

I grunted and said nothing.

“Go to sleep, Han Jiang, it’ll be fine after a nap.” Zheng Fei comforted me.

I slipped my hands under her nightgown and felt her breasts, they were soft, the kind a grown woman has, and I didn’t feel the urge to do anything at all, this wasn’t my kind of girl.

“Don’t be like this, Han Jiang, we’re all friends.” Zheng Fei gently pushed my hand and without pushing, she laid down beside me and helped me cover the towel quilt, and I quickly fell asleep.

I woke up in the middle of the night not really knowing what time it was, it was surprisingly quiet around me, I climbed out of bed and found my slippers to go to the bathroom, my mind was now blank compared to the beginning of that initial drunkenness, I was flabbergasted when I got back to my bed, how come there was a woman beside me? I lie far away, open eyes staring at the ceiling, the air conditioning at some point has been turned off, I do not think I remembered the past days, I do not feel any degradation, I know what I’m doing what I want to do, my things do not need you to care, I do not need your concern.

Do you think of me in that world?

The Eight Days and Seven Nights of Xiang Daughter’s Many Loves (II)

I woke up quietly in the early morning, feeling full of energy, my head didn’t hurt at all, I climbed out of bed, dressed, washed my face and brushed my teeth. Liu Fang and Zheng Fei slept quietly, I gently opened the door of the balcony, the weather is quite cool, in the distance from some low and dilapidated buildings, occasionally there are a few new skyscrapers, so that this just woke up from last night’s drunkenness in the city, there are still some vibrant vitality.

I went back to the room, the two of them are not going to wake up look, I sat for a while, in front of the desk to turn over a few books, are some boring magazines, I open the side of the computer, familiar with the WINDOWS interface appeared in front of me, I pulled the phone line from Zheng Fei’s bedside, connected to the modem, the Internet to the Literature City Web site, the column is still my old self, long time have not updated, there is a pen name called “Mouse”, “Mouse”. A pen name called “Mouse”.

The netizens in the above wrote some thoughts, I slowly read, think the network is really unreal, in the real life environment, each other’s way of life is very different, like today, I woke up in Changsha, a strange place, and in the past those online as if very familiar with friends, who knows where they spent last night.

After a while, Zheng Fei and Liu Fang both woke up, Liu Fang walked around the room in his underwear, revealing his robust and sturdy body, the two of them washed their faces and changed, I went to the balcony and called Li He’s cell phone, which didn’t work, no one answered the home phone, and the same thing happened to Su Ya’s, which I dialed over and over again rather patiently and couldn’t get through.

I walked into the house, the two of them were sitting on the bed watching TV, Changsha’s TV programs seem to be quite good, ranking among the best in the country, Zheng Fei saw me walk in and asked me what I had planned for today, “We’re driving to a resort tomorrow to play tennis, why don’t we go together?” She asked us both.

“Tell me more, I’ll call you tonight,” I said, “We’re going to a friend’s place first, to get settled.”

We expressed our gratitude to Zheng Fei and excused ourselves to go out. The sky was gray and cool, we walked casually on the street, I proceeded to call Li He, I don’t know if it was Changsha’s bad mobile network or my cell phone roaming problem, but I couldn’t get through anyway. Finally we found a public phone on the side of the road and called Suya’s cell phone, Suya said she was on her way to Li He’s store and asked us to meet there.

We took a cab, Changsha’s cabs are mostly dilapidated Charley, not many cars on the road, a moment we went to Huangxing Road on the newly opened that “four-dimensional” mall, the face is not big, inside is quite spacious, partitioned into a one-on-one store contracted to an individual, the two of us turned around in a corner to find the Li He’s KK fashion house, Li He and Leng Jia in setting up the clothes, Suya sitting on the side is eating breakfast. Li He and Leng Jia in the arrangement of clothes, Suya sitting on the side is eating breakfast.

The two of us walked in, it was a small store immediately crowded, Li He took my luggage, placed in the corner of the cabinet, she cut her hair short, the person also lost a lot of weight, appearing a bit emaciated, when the plump and beautiful wonderful girl shadow can not be seen at all, I think the heart feels strange, some annoyed, some regret, but also some relief. I introduced Liu Fang to them to recognize, Su Ya cheeky and greeted him, she is still the same, although not very beautiful, but smooth white skin, delicate, a few years of time as if there is no change in her body.

Leng Jia organized his clothes, smiled and came over to greet us, I just saw her twice four years ago, the typical youthful beauty girl, she came to eat when I lived with Li He, and later played tennis together once, after I left Changsha, I heard that she found a boyfriend in Guangzhou, and has been in Guangzhou, his boyfriend has some money, so they help her and an acting company to sign a contract, shoot some TV dramas and put out a cassette tape or something, it seems to have not made much of a name for itself, but it’s not a big deal to me. It seems that she has not made a name for herself. This world, not everyone has Zhao Wei’s luck, the last time Li He came to Shenzhen, said Leng Jia and Guangzhou boyfriend broke up, back to Changsha in the TV station to find a job in the life of the channel as a host.

Leng Jia wore a short green blouse, very casual a short skirt, hair is not up to the shoulders, lively and lovely, but compared to my memory of her bright and colorful look, or some lack of, back then, I heart is quite a crush on her, these years I do not know whether they have changed, or I have changed.

The room is too small, I and Liu Fang a little fidgety, stay for a while, I asked them to eat together at noon, and Liu Fang to the street to drink water. The street is full of people, this is a busy commercial road, Liu Fang and I walked slowly, looking around, across the street is a theater called “red”, a long time ago, upstairs opened a “disco” bar, we almost every day to play, Xu Bingbing, Li He, Li Qing are here to know each other. Bing Bing, Li He, Li Qing are here to know, I am quite emotional and Liu Fang talked about some of the previous stories, Liu Fang listened with interest, from time to time expressed his unique views on life and women.

“and women dating, can never act on feelings,” Liu Fang vulgarly said: “before you grab her breasts, open her legs to fuck her, all the eye to eye, love is false, what feelings, women are born to be slutty, know? You know?”

“There are two kinds of women, a whore and a mother, according to Lin Yutang.” I corrected his prejudice.

“There are two kinds of women, those who can be fucked and those who can’t, according to Wang Shuo.” Liu Fang said happily.

I looked at Liu Fang with my mouth wide open in surprise.

The red “disco” bar has long been closed, the theater is still there, hanging on the wall of the large movie posters, around the National Day, everywhere in the National Anthem, the poster on the two actors cold and strong, far-reaching gaze, Liu Fang and I appreciate, China has not been a decent actor, twenty-something years old without a little life experience, needless to say, those thirty-something film students are also very fake, so there are some ugly stars, or Jiang Wen, who played Chinese men as a fool. China has never had any decent male actors, not to mention film students in their twenties who have no life experience, and those in their thirties are also very fake, so they make some ugly stars, or Jiang Wen, who plays all Chinese men as idiots. No wonder, culture is always a process of accumulation and precipitation, after the revolution of Chinese culture, and now still in the process of thawing and recovery, it is impossible to expect a director who has not even read the “Song of Eternal Hatred” to have a deep understanding of the theme of life and expression. They were lining up to share the cabbage last night, but today they are full and warm, so of course they have to play with a few beautiful actresses first. As for Zhang Yimou, who took China’s shrouded culture and went abroad to air it out and win an award, it’s not something that this bunch of bastards in China can do with that amount of talent.

Next door to the theater is a sporting goods store, Liu Fang and I fancy a pair of NIKE sports pants, simple and comfortable style, I hesitated, did not buy, we have been turned to Zhongshan Road, and then drive back, the time is still very early, next to the “Rosa” Cake House to drink.

I called Lin Mei in Shanghai and told her I was in Changsha.

“Give me the phone numbers of some pretty girls,” I said seriously, “I need them.”

“Go to hell.” Lin Mei was happy to hear it was my voice.

“Are you still in Shanghai? How come you didn’t go down for the show?” I remembered what she had said on the phone when I was in Shenzhen.

“Leaving tomorrow, isn’t it only the 30th today, what are you doing in Changsha?”

“Playing, came with my coworker to see an old friend.”

“It’s an old flame, isn’t it?” Lin Mei said with a smile.

“My old flame is not you,” I also laughed: “When to come to Shenzhen to see me? I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” after a moment of silence on the other side of the phone, Lin Mei asked again, “Why don’t you go and play with Feng Zhe? You went to Guangzhou to see her?”

“She went to Chongqing on vacation to see that boyfriend of hers originally, the last time she went to Shenzhen I happened to be traveling in Beijing to open the UPU conference, I didn’t see her and was scolded by her.”

“Serves you right, what the hell is going on in Beijing, it’s still not looking for that little friend of yours from the dance theater.”

Liu Fang and I went back to Li Huo’s store and they packed up their things, locking the door and heading out, Li Huo and I walking behind. “Why do you do it so hard?” I asked her in a low voice.

“Your own store, how can you not do it properly, I figured out that you have to sell at least six hundred dollars a day to keep your capital.” Li He replied in a soft voice. Her words are always very reasonable, I am sick of thinking, I hate reasonable words, those words are either lies, or reality is too much.

We discussed on the street for a while to go where to eat, Leng Jia’s idea is the most, she hosted a program called “Big Mouth Eat Four Square”, which is specialized in introducing Changsha a variety of eating, drinking and entertainment venues, and finally we decided to go to a “dry pot” restaurant, we took two cars, I and Li He sat together. We took two cars and Li He and I sat together. She did not know the specific location of the store, we got off the bus in front of a park on the way, called Leng Jia, and went all the way there to see the three of them already sitting inside.

“We thought you guys went to a room.” Suya laughed, Changsha girls talk and joke erotically without scruples, and Liu Fang had gotten used to it.

“It’s better to be happy than to have a room.” Li Ho says in Changsha, and I think she’s getting pretty vulgar now.

The owner’s wife of that store knew Leng Jia and warmly came over to greet us, and Leng Jia asked us what we liked to eat.

“As usual,” I said with a big grin, “let’s start with a bowl of shark’s fin to rinse out our mouths.”

We all laugh, Liu Fang is also lazy to order food, let the boss’s wife to casually arrange, the kind of pot to burn a period of time before, we wait for the food, just talk about some of the previous things, Su Ya and I are extremely familiar, she turned out to be quite good relations with one of my Beijing buddies, and I have an open and honest relationship with me and a cheerful personality, so speak without fear.

“Han Jiang, how the hell are you these years?” Suya asked me, “Did you get rich?”

“No,” I looked at Li Huo pouring tea for me: “If I get rich, I’ll come back and marry you.”

“Forget it, you still think of me?” Suya rested her cheeks grudgingly and gave me a blank look, amusing everyone.

“In fact, my heart for you,” I said seriously to Surya, “is as it was on the day I first met you… I have no feelings at all.”

Liu Fang listened to the boredom up, said to tell everyone a yellow joke, we all said yes, it seems to be a common hobby.

Liu Fang cleared his throat and spoke with a sense of humor: “There was a couple who called doing that kind of thing ‘washing clothes.’ One night the husband and wife quarreled and suddenly wanted to do it. One day the couple quarreled, and at night the husband suddenly wanted to, so he told his son: ‘Go, ask your mom if she’s going to wash her clothes tonight?’ The son went to ask his mother, and his wife got very angry: ‘Damn, just after the fight, you still want to do this, son, go and tell your father that the washing machine is broken.’ Son went to tell his father that the washing machine is broken, the husband thought, then forget it. After a while, the wife suddenly had the same idea, and called her son: ‘Go tell your father that the washing machine is fixed, and do you still want to wash clothes?’ The son ran over to tell his father, only to hear his father said in a jar: ‘No, already washed by hand.'”

When Liu Fang was telling the story, I kept smiling without saying a word, because I had heard this story a long time ago, and what kind of characters Su Ya and the other Changsha girls were, they had probably heard it before they were sixteen years old, and I remembered that when I was in Changsha I used to see them spreading the cassette tapes of such stories from Taiwan.

Sure enough, Leng Jia and Su Ya didn’t have much of a reaction, but just smiled politely : “This story of yours is too old-fashioned.” Suya smiled and said to Liu Fang: “I’ll tell a story from the bus.”

“There is a man, this way on the bus,” Suya right hand five fingers into a claw, virtual support in the air: “He has been maintained in this position does not move, the people on the bus feel very strange, think that this person is not in the worship of God, or there is something wrong. Later, the road on the car more, the bus suddenly came to a sharp brake, everyone crowded together, the man also fell, reached out to hold the railing in front of him, until the car stops, only to hear the man cried: ‘This is the end of the world, my wife’s size is gone, how can I go to buy clothes ah.'”

Liu Fang and I have never heard of this story, laughed out loud, Leng Jia said with a smile: “I also tell a bus thing. It is said that there is an old man, with a goose on the bus, bus regulations are not allowed to bring animals on the bus, the old man hid the goose in the crotch of his pants, and afraid of goose suffocation, the zipper pull open, so that the goose head exposed to the outside air, the old man felt very proud, hanging his hand on the car railing, whistling. Next to an old lady very curious look, has been staring at the old man underneath the look, finally the old man looked anxious: ‘What do you look at, have not seen it? The old lady was a little shy, said in a thin voice: ‘I have seen, but I have never seen the long eyes.'”

Liu Fang was dumbfounded; he was probably used to seeing men telling dirty jokes while girls were blushing and laughing, but he had never seen many girls like this, who were outside the realm of the common people, but who had no inhibitions about laughing and joking, and he was not used to it. It was only after a long time that she took a hard sip of tea and said indignantly, “Yes, come with me on this one… I’m a thirty-something year old man and I’m not afraid of this… one more…”

“Man, give me a man,” Suya on the side of the flirtatious, said: “there is a woman, divorced and son living with her son, her son especially want a bicycle, but the mother did not buy her, one day the son passed by his mother’s door, saw her mother is praying to the mirror,” “Suya put her left hand to the chest, and then put her right hand on the chest, like the young woman in love:” ‘man, ah, give me a man’, her son was enlightened. “Soa put her left hand on her chest, and then her right hand on her chest, like the young woman in love: “‘Man, ah, give me a man’, her son understood, and went back to his room and prayed in front of the mirror in the same way as his mother: ‘Bicycle, ah, give me a man’,” he said. ‘Bicycle, ah, give me the bicycle.'”

Sua learned like a great, we all laughed out loud, the first time we met that a little bit of constraints are even a little bit gone.

“I also tell a story on the bus,” I remembered a joke, told them: “There is a very myopic girl on the bus, holding a banana in her right hand to eat, suddenly a sharp brake, she dashed forward, the banana fell, hastily picked up and sat down to continue to eat, and after a few stops After a few more stops, she suddenly heard the man standing next to her say: ‘Excuse me, miss, can I get off now?'”

We joked and laughed as we finished our meal, I felt a little spicy, I didn’t eat much, when we paid the bill, the boss’s wife said no need, Leng Jia had just helped them do a program on TV. Liu Fang and I were both upset, and not bad for so little money, “Then next time we’ll be embarrassed to come back here to eat.” Leng Jia also said to that boss lady.

“Then just give whatever you want, and don’t count anything.” The boss’s wife couldn’t push it and said politely.

“Yes,” I said to Liu Fang, who was pulling out money, “don’t forget, give two thousand on the line.” Everyone stood up cheekily, the boss’s wife also amused, Liu Fang still went to settle the bill, the boss’s wife more discount, in fact, Changsha’s restaurants are very cheap.

As we walked outside, Leng Jia and I walked behind, “Remember me?” I asked her with a smile.

“Of course.” She didn’t smile and walked past me, my heart fluttering slightly as I looked outside to see that it was one hundred percent fall.

Suya took Liu Fang to a hotel called “in the sky” to open the room, I, Li He and Leng Jia back to the store to get luggage, all the way to Li He and I have nothing to say, she treats me to a normal very, back to the store, I suddenly remembered that the sports store, and Li He went to buy a pair of NIKE sneakers, bought a pair of sports shorts and a few pairs of socks, I like to play tennis, when I went out I saw the sports pants again, hesitated or did not buy. I like to play tennis, when I went out I saw the sports pants again, hesitated, or did not buy. Li Ho to watch the store, Leng Jia’s home from the hotel where we live not far away, the two of us took a cab to go, in the car we did not talk much, she flipped over the things I bought, I feel like my heart is in chaos, a lot of things do not think clearly, first to the hotel, get off the car I invited her to come over a while and the three of us to play poker, she said that she wanted to first send things home.

I called Liu Fang in room 718, I rode the cramped elevator up to the seventh floor and was surprised to find a new and spacious room in the Zhongtian Hotel, the carpet was clean and I was happy that Liu Fang was lying naked on the bed and Suya was sitting on a chair watching TV. “Nothing happened, right?” I threw my stuff on the table and smiled as I joked about the two of them.

“You’re late,” Suya laughed, “It’s long over, where are they?”

“Li Ho is watching the store, Leng Jia went home to put her things away, come over later.”

I joked with them some more and took my clothes and went to the restroom to take a shower, and after a while, I heard Suya calling Leng Jia from her room and came over to knock on the restroom door again.

“What for?” I asked as I turned off the faucet.

“Leng Jia said she wants to sleep and won’t be coming over, so I’ll go to Li He’s store first, so you guys can rest for a while, and we’ll come back in the evening.”

I changed my clothes, lit a cigarette, leaned back on the bed and watched TV, chatting with Liu Fang in one way or another.

“Don’t all Changsha girls count on their words and forget what they’ve said?” Liu Fang asked me.

“Yes, that’s what they are.” I tilted my head back and tried to exhale smoke rings.

“That’s why you can’t get too involved when picking up girls, so you can win a hundred battles.”

“And what’s the point.”

At night when Li He and Su Ya came over, I and Liu Fang are still sleeping, I got up and opened the door, pull open the window , the sky is already dark, the street lights, I shouted to wake up Liu Fang, and went to wash his face, feel the spirit is very good, the life in Shenzhen eight to six, every day hard work brick by brick to build socialism, where there is such a comfortable afternoon nap.

Li He didn’t change her clothes, her face was still a bit yellow, and when she went out I noticed that she walked a bit outwardly, and from the back she had become a purely middle-aged woman, and I knew that between the two of us it was completely over.

The four of us took a car, to the five way to a “Beijing dumpling restaurant” to eat, Liu Fang casually ordered a few dishes, I asked for a bottle of beer slowly tasting, diagonally across the seat sitting a few young girls, staring at us uncontrollably.

Almost finished eating, Leng Jia came, she changed a set of clothes, wearing beige pants, showing a long and beautiful body, once sat down on the jibber-jabber and Li Huo and they talk in Changsha, Liu Fang and I do not know what they are talking about. I paid the bill, Suya said to go to Phoenix to play, we said we just went there yesterday, Leng Jia said then go to Hedong, when we went out to take a taxi, I was still sitting with Li He, everyone still think of us as a couple, four years of friendship.

Hedong turned out to be in Changsha Youth Palace, in front of the bright lights, selling snacks, paintings, flowers, phone calls, waiting for people, handsome men and beautiful women and weird men and women noisy. I bought a ticket, walked into the door, the door is a bag storage place, and then inside there is a ring bar, surrounded by a number of tables and seats, the dance floor has been crowded with people, the stage a few DJ in hysterical sensationalism, we are not far from the door to find a table to sit down, asked for a dozen of sun beer, next to a few video game machines, some people are playing racing.

I suddenly remembered something, walked to the door to call Zheng Fei, told her we have settled down, live in the Zhongtian Hotel, tomorrow may not be able to go to the resort with them to play, Zheng Fei is very polite, said to come back to invite us to dinner.

I walked back to my seat and realized that they were all gone and there was nothing on the table, I wondered if they had changed seats, so I looked around inside and didn’t see them. I saw many young Changsha girls, still as pretty as before, but their style had changed a lot, and some of them looked immature with their hair venting red and green. I went to the restroom, and when I came out, I still hadn’t seen them, so I sat in my original seat and watched the girls come and go.

After a while Lihoe came back and they went dancing, “Didn’t you see us dance?” Li Ho asked me as she sat down affectionately beside me.

“No.” The lady came over with a beer in an ice cone, and I took one, put a slice of lemon in it, and took a gentle sip.

After another while, Leng Jia, Su Ya and Liu Fang all came over happily and took a bottle of beer each.

“Born me beautiful I can’t help it, I’ve been so trippy since I was a kid.” Sua sang as she wriggled restlessly in her seat to the dance music.

“Hey, those girls were flirting with you just now,” Leng Jia and Su Ya made fun of Liu Fang: “Why didn’t you react.” Li He and I also laughed at Liu Fang.

“It’s not that I’m not reacting, it’s just too ugly,” Liu Fang said helplessly as he took off his hat.

“Don’t you just love ugly women?” Leng Jia smiled wistfully.

“Don’t make fun of people’s looks,” Suya said with a sense of justice: “It’s not their fault if they don’t look good, if they want to blame it, they can only blame their parents.”

We stared at her dumbfounded, and Sua paused and said, “But if they have to come out at night to scare people, it’s their fault.”

We drank wine, laughing and talking nonsense for a while, then ran to the dance floor to dance, I listened to the clanging drums, strange that I can not find a little feeling, a few years past, I can not even dance, I remember when the popularity of “bouncing”, we have practiced hard for a while, jumping quite professional, we learned it from Beijing! The new tricks we learned from Beijing used to make Changsha girls envious. I looked at the flickering lights on the dance floor, and felt a deep sense of strangeness.

Leng Jia and Li He are the same age, but look much more youthful, and even a little childish, in fact, Su Ya is three years older than the two of them, but may be because of the character of the reason, instead of appearing smaller, next to a few girls dancing like crazy, sexy waist with the rhythm of the twisting around, I danced for a while, said to go to the restroom, and returned to his seat to drink wine while watching other people play video games.

When they came back, I had already drunk two bottles of beer, drunken eyes, in fact, to let me get drunk really easy, my alcohol is really too small, alcohol up I feel much better, smiling to see Leng Jia and Liu Fang play “DING GANG BOY, MAJIMAJIHUI”, that is a very interesting game, two people first with a hammer, scissors, cloth guessing fist, the winner of the finger with a few circles in front of the loser, reciting words under his breath to do magic, suddenly pointing up and down, left and right in one of the directions, the loser is a very interesting game. Two people first with hammer, scissors, cloth guessing, the winner with a finger in front of the loser waved a few circles, the mouth reciting words, do magic, suddenly pointing up and down, left and right one of the direction, the loser needs to immediately turn his head in a different direction from the finger to be considered a tie, otherwise you have to drink, the general public after drinking a little bit of wine are a little dizzy, see where the finger points to turn his head to where the comical and fun, I looked at Liu Fang’s head! I watched Liu Fang’s head turn around with Leng Jia’s finger and thought that he might really be enchanted.

Li He sat beside me, quietly accompanying me, I suddenly remembered many years ago, when I was boisterous, and people gambling and dancing and laughing and fooling around, Li He was the same way, quietly sitting beside me, I drank too much, she poured me boiled water, I spilled wine, she looked for a paper towel to dry for me, everything was very natural at that time, why do I have a feeling of boredom now? Is it because she’s not as pretty as she used to be? Is it because I’ve changed? Or is it because the river of time has long washed away all emotions?

Dance music stopped, the lights are also brighter, there are entertainers out of the show, suddenly heard a cheer, it was two sexy body, dressed in exposed women with two chairs out, this is the kind of erotic dance, I and Liu Fang are very excited, crossing their feet to see, the front of the people a lot of people also stood up, blocking us from seeing clearly, Leng Jia jumped on the speakers, pull me up, the two women’s performances of the bold sensation, hot action, to see onlookers are blood boiling, the speakers are small, I and Leng Jia stood very close, I smelled her deep on the aroma, I think this scene is a messy fascination, I think the scene is a good idea. The two women’s performances are bold and sensational, the action is hot, look at the onlookers are blood, the speaker is very small, I and Leng Jia stood very close to me, I smelled her deep on the aroma, think this scene, people are confused, difficult to hold.

After watching the show, I returned to my seat, Suya met two acquaintances, was sitting on the side chatting, I feel I already have seven or eight points of alcohol, it is already after midnight, we took the bag out, late at night, the outside is still crowded, lively, we walked slowly along the street outside the Palace of Youth, I remembered that in the past there had been a girl and I told about her and the boy she loved deeply between the girl smart and beautiful, that girl is too pure to see everything but can not be extricated. The girl was smart and beautiful, but she was too pure to see everything, but she was trapped by love and couldn’t get out of it. I still remember her aggravated tone when she cried; “If this is a kind of fate, then no matter which life or which world, I will never need it.” This kind of innocent feelings for Changsha, for me now, as if it is like the time reversal, we all return to childhood, is impossible.

Liu Fang couldn’t be pestered by the kid selling flowers, and bought two roses to give to Leng Jia and Su Ya, and I saw a glimmer of something in Li He’s eyes, and it disappeared in a flash.

“Han Jiang, buy a flower to send Li He.” Suya asked me as she sniffed the rose in her hand.

“He never buys flowers for girls.” Li Ho said.

“Giving away roses is a good thing. I would like to buy it, but unfortunately I am already old.” I said pretentiously, but in my mind I wondered, four years apart, is she living in my fantasy, or am I living in her fantasy?

We took a taxi back to Zhongtian, they went upstairs to their rooms, I ran to the lobby of the store to buy cigarettes, the counter has been locked, the girl on duty at the front desk took the key and ran over, asked me what I want to buy, I want a pack of China and a pack of Hibiscus King, and asked for some snacks, pay when I was surprised to find that this girl is so beautiful, combed with short hair, slim figure, the appearance of the gentleman, eyes are not very large, but look at people’s When you look at people, your eyes are not very big, but when you look at people, your eyes are flowing, and you are charming. I suddenly felt a little impulsive.

“Why did you come out to work at such a young age?” I asked her with a smile as I took the cigarettes and took out a hundred dollars.

“Not small ah, I’m twenty-three.” The girl looked at me, smiled and said, “Ninety-four dollars in total, do you have any change?”

“No.”

“Wait a moment then, I’ll get some change.” She was a bit overwhelmed by the way I kept staring at her, and I knew I usually looked pretty svelte, but now that I’d had a bit to drink, it was hard to tell if I didn’t look a bit horny.

“Forget it, it’s only a few bucks.” I took my stuff and left with a smile on my face.

I went back to the room, Li He and Leng Jia were lying on the bed, Su Ya was in the bathroom taking a shower, Liu Fang was lying on the other bed, the lights were all on, making the room look bright and spacious. I threw my cigarette on the table and talked about the girl downstairs.

“Then don’t come back, go get a room with her.” Leng Jia said indignantly.

“That won’t do, I don’t feel comfortable with the four of you living there,” I laughed: “I have to be responsible for Liu Fang.”

After Suya came out, we began to play cards, play Changsha popular “three doha”, this kind of game is still a few years ago when I was in Changsha and Suya learned, “I was not familiar with you, it is that time to play poker only to recognize,” Suya seriously to me: “I think you are particularly smart, just told you, you are particularly good, Shen Xiangdong can not. “I think you’re especially smart, just told you, you played especially well, Shen Xiangdong can not.”

Shen Xiangdong was from a German company in Beijing and was hanging out with us at the time.

“So that’s when you fell in love with me.” I said with realization.

“Love you.” Sua laughed and hit me.

“Actually, Shen Xiangdong is really quite good to you.” I said to Suya.

“It was pretty good.” Sua lit her cigarette, a little sentimental.

At the beginning, I really won a few times in a row, Suya’s coat and Liu Fang’s top have been won off, Leng Jia is too uncomfortable pants, turn out my new sports shorts and put them on, I suddenly feel a little hungry, looking around for snacks I just bought, Li Huo helped me to soak up a bag of instant noodles, after eating the noodles, everyone does not want to continue to fight, lying on the bed side by side and resting.

“Don’t point your big ass at me.” Liu Fang suddenly said to Suya beside him, he would always suddenly say very vulgar and licentious things with a serious expression, we all couldn’t help but laugh. The TV volume was very low, playing a salty program, we were all a bit disinterested, Li He was probably tired from watching the store during the day, Liu Fang had a little bit of wine, both of them lying there were very quiet, I think they might have fallen asleep.

“Han Jiang, tell a story.” Suya said.

“What kind of story?”

“It’s the story about the ghost you told the last time I went to Beijing and was with Shen Xiangdong.” Suya jumped out of bed and turned off the TV and the lights, the room darkened all of a sudden, and in the darkness I saw Leng Jia’s bright eyes, looking right at me.

The room was silent, the streetlight reflected a little light through the window  and I stubbed out the cigarette in my hand, feeling that everything was incredible and yet reasonable.

“Well,” I said to the excited Suya and Leng Jia, “I’ll tell you a true story. There was a doctor who was called in the middle of the night to deliver a baby. He walked from one end of the town to the other, on the way to see a person in front of him is also in a hurry, and would like to rush up to a companion, but just can not catch up, I do not realize that followed the person walked a long way, suddenly turned into a dead, facing a high wall, the person but disappeared all of a sudden, disappeared before he turned back to look at the doctor, the expression is very strange, fierce and hateful look. The doctor was startled and rushed to the patient’s house on the right road and delivered a child. This doctor held the child in his arms to see, the child is looking straight at him, Hur is the face of the road, the expression is also fierce and hateful look, the doctor was startled, hand a loose child almost fell to the ground, he hurriedly held the child, fixed his eyes to see again, is the ordinary just born out of the child’s appearance, I do not know whether it is their own eye blurred, or what is going on.”

Sua and Leng Jia listened without saying a word, my tone flat and dry, as if it were a voice from afar.

I took a long breath, continued: “Some people say that there are ghosts in this world, some people say there are not, in fact, each person’s body is hosted on top of a field, is a kind of objective existence of the material, there is a weight, as if people often say that the soul. If a person’s normal death, then his body will slowly decay, into the material world of the cycle of metabolism, and the field will slowly fall apart, into the whole universe field of the cycle of regeneration; but if the person is wrongful death, violent death, or death just happened to have what the wind, rain, lightning, and so on, the natural world of the very strong electromagnetic phenomenon, or have a very strong beliefs or matters of the heart are not yet finished, then the field may not have a normal scattered, but condensed into a kind of do not know what the soul is. Instead, it may condense into a monster of some kind, either parasitic or suspended in the world, causing all sorts of strange things, or what people often call ghosts. We often encounter ‘speak of the devil, speak of the devil’, for example, we have just talked about someone over dinner upstairs, and when we go downstairs, we happen to meet someone, in fact, it is he who has come to the neighborhood, and his field collides with the field of the person upstairs, so that people subconsciously think of him, and talk about him, and then they go downstairs and meet him again, and this kind of phenomenon has been formed. “

Suya nodded in agreement, and Leng Jia looked at me strangely.

“This field is also strong and weak, why in the graveyard on the building of residential often have strange things, while in the graveyard on the building of schools or barracks will be fine, is because the school and the barracks are often among the outstanding people, the field is very strong, can be suppressed. Another example is an empty house, if no one lives in it for ten years, even though someone cleans it every day, if you just live in it, you will still have some strange feelings. If you have been living in a house, and occasionally go on a business trip for a few days, even if no one cleans it, you will still not have any strange feelings when you come back. In fact, this thing called the field, but also just a name, but the former so-called ghosts and gods of a more scientific explanation, like a bad station in the countless murderous spirits, or the death of three or five souls, whether it is possible to through a ceremony or a few times to pay tribute to this condensation of the field of the field scattered, it is not known, since ancient times, people can not cognitively things, often turned into a superstition, coupled with the utilitarian fraudulent warlocks and the inherent faults of human nature, they have been mythologized by foolish men and women, and have become farther and farther away from the truth of the matter.”

I pause for a moment, a slight sigh of regret, as if the world outside the appearance of a tall man, thinking that it would be better to “do not do it, do not rest”.

” ‘Speak of Cao Cao, Cao Cao arrives’, not only is this the case with people, but also with ghosts and gods, between midnight, if someone talks about them, they will come here to listen quietly, you see that the window  underneath, why is there no wind to automate it? ” Su Ya and Leng Jia followed my finger to the window  to see, really slightly trembling.

“This evening, to such a few girls, do not talk about the wind and moon, but on the ghosts and gods,” I secretly feel funny, suddenly remembered a night in Beijing many years ago, the heart and some sour. Things are unpredictable, ghosts and gods are indistinct, who do not know what is going on, how you can say, but the separation of life and death, who can not escape, is not a few sentences of gossip after tea can be dismissed.

“I’ll tell another Western story, not related to ghosts and gods,” I see them look like they have not finished, then said: “This is actually a quite famous movie, there is a doctor, and his beautiful wife, daughter and just four-year-old boy moved to a town to live in a happy life. The neighbor, an old man, tells the doctor that the people of the town are very friendly, but don’t go to the forbidden area in the back by the burial ground, because legend has it that what is buried there will be resurrected, but not into the original. This doctor, because of his profession, was very bold and did not take this to heart. His daughter, who was studying in another city, kept a cat at home that she particularly liked, and one day it was suddenly hit by a car and died. Fearing that his daughter would come back to grieve, he sneaked off in the middle of the night to the forbidden area and buried the cat’s body there. As a result, the next night, the cat really came back alive, but changed strangely, that old neighbor knew, warned him, that place although there is the power to make the dead things come back to life, but in the process of resurrection but do not know what kind of things given, and finally come back to life looks like the original, but in fact it is a very evil thing, do not take risks. “

Speaking here, I lit a cigarette and gently inhaled, the smoke filled the air and lingered, Leng Jia lay behind the smoke, quietly listening, her eyes looked at me, crystal flashing, but the expression on her face was a bit strange, a few days later I realized what she was thinking at that time.

“Some time later, in the late afternoon, the family were having tea on the lawn, and the old man next door was there, and the little four-year-old boy was stumbling around by himself playing with a little kite, and nobody noticed that he suddenly ran out onto the highway beyond the lawn, and a big truck went whizzing by, and this exceedingly sweet-looking little boy was run over and killed.”

“The family was of course very sad, especially her wife, in pain, he looked at his agonized wife, secretly made up his mind, at night time, this doctor went to the burial place to dig up the body of the little boy, and buried it again in that forbidden land, the next night, he happened to be called to answer an emergency, and the result was that the little boy was really resurrected, and crawled out of the mud The next day, he was called to the emergency room, but the little boy did come back to life, crawling out of the mud, with a strange expression, and walking down the road to his home. The old man next door found the little boy, and knowing that it was a very dangerous thing to do, he tried to trick the little boy into his own room to restrain him, but the result was that he was killed by this little monster who had already been ferocious and abnormal, and then his wife heard the phone call from her home, and it was the little boy’s very cute voice: ‘Mom, I’m at the house of whoever it was, so come and play with me. ‘ The doctor’s wife, with tears in her eyes, ran to the old man’s house and was killed by the child. The doctor returned home to find the situation changed, and rushed to that neighbor’s house again, and upon entering the door he saw his wife’s body hanging in the hall, sad and angry, and after a thrilling struggle he finally injected the poison into his own son’s body. He sat in the hall and looked at his wife, wanting to cry, he was too much in love with his wife to bear her departure from this world, he gritted his teeth, picked up her body and buried it again in that forbidden land.”

I stopped and rested for a while, then continued: “So the next night, the doctor sat in his own home, looking at his wife’s beautiful photo on the table, the feeling in his heart is difficult to express, he knew that he would return to his wife’s body, in fact, I do not know what is a thing, but could not bear the pain of losing his wife, in the middle of the night, only to see the door handle gently turned, his wife was covered with blood and dirt, appeared in the door, the doctor turned around, tears flowed, and his wife embraced tightly, his wife also hugged tightly. Turned, his wife covered with blood and mud, appeared in the doorway, the doctor turned around, tears flowed down at once, and his wife embraced tightly, his wife also hugged him tightly, but his hand suddenly copied the scalpel on the table, lifted up and stabbed down fiercely, the film rattled to a halt.”

“Men’s hearts, really hard as iron,” I finished the story, also finished the cigarette in the hand, smiled and said: “In fact, this story is just to say a truth, if the destiny is already does not belong to you things, you force to have, but counterproductive, will only be a more brutal results. “

“I also think it is,” Suya agreed with me: “What’s yours is yours, and what’s not yours is useless to force it.”

“What about you, if you were a doctor, what would you do?” Leng Jia asked me: “What kind of person are you?”

“Me? I don’t know, before I seem to know what kind of person I am, but then slowly forget myself,” I smiled bitterly, said faintly: “There is one thing in this world, called the law.”

Leng Jia and Suya looked at me a bit puzzled.

I put out the cigarette in my hand, holding it in my hand on the top of the cylinder loosened, the cigarette fell in the cylinder, “every time I throw the cigarette, I think, this time loosened, the cigarette will not fall, but stop in the air, the result is every time, the cigarette will fall, this is the law, the fact that the result will be like this, once is like this, 10,000 times is also like this, bias I don’t believe in evil, 10,000 of the Maybe there will be a one, right, maybe this time it will be different from the previous one, maybe it is the real love, and what is the result, it still falls down, the law is like that, it is not shifted by our will.”

Talking about myself, I suddenly a little emotional: “fate as the waves of the sea, if you fight with it, feel overwhelmed, but if you hold the attitude of going with the flow, everything does not matter, but very easy, and in fact, the final result, there is nothing too fight respectively.”

These are the words buried in my heart for a long time, usually hard to fight when almost never mentioned to anyone, I did not expect to be in such a moment, and as if another world of a few Changsha girls said out.

“I come from a poor background, but I still have ambition, and I don’t think that money means a career… I have to do something for the people of this world, so that I don’t live up to my life… I’m only working hard now for the sake of building a career in the future… As for feelings, they always come second to a man’s feelings… I used to believe in a particular kind of feeling, and in fact… I’ve experienced it myself, up until the time of my In the year of my birth… I went to Putuo Mountain that year…”

Suddenly realizing that I had said too much, I laughed, and Suya and Leng Jia laughed as well.

“The more places I’ve traveled in the past few years and the more people I’ve met in the community, I’ve come to realize how hard it is to have a few people who really care about you.” I changed the subject.

“I can care about you,” Leng Jia added: “We all care about you.”

“No need,” I laughed: “I’m a person who is most afraid of owing favors and people caring about me.”

“In fact, everyone has their own ideas, and their own bumps in the road,” Suya is still immersed in my words just now: “that year when you were in Changsha, our group of girls are still quite small, and now they are all scattered, fucking me struggled for so long, but it is still nothing? “

“Why are you struggling?” I laughed out loud: “Women want to make money, to not struggle ah.”

After joking for a while, everyone was a little tired, we went to wash our faces and prepare to sleep, Liu Fang rolled over in a daze, Li He also woke up, I took the bedspread, spread it on the floor, put the other bedspread over my body, and lay down with my clothes, Leng Jia and Su Ya slept on one bed, Liu Fang slept on the other bed, Li He washed his face, and came over and lay down beside me.

A few times during the night Lihoe put her hands on me, and I deftly disengaged them.

The Eight Days and Seven Nights of Xiang Daughter’s Many Loves (III)

As if it was daytime, the surroundings were changing, a large group of people were sitting together at dinner… Students I hadn’t seen for a long time, a familiar classroom… Why was it so crowded? Is it someone’s birthday? I can’t drink anymore, really, don’t fill me up again. Didn’t you get married in Beijing?

How did it get here? Where is this place? This is Changsha.

I was woken up by a phone ringing, I opened my eyes in a daze, my dream classmates disappeared all of a sudden, I sat up and realized that I was lying on the floor, Liu Fang was sleeping soundly on the bed, and the three of them were no longer there.

I got up and answered the phone, it was Sua called, “Watching TV or not?” She asked me over the phone, “There’s a live parade going on.”

“What time did you guys leave in the morning?” I asked, confused.

“It’s after eight o’clock, Li He has to go open the store, so Leng Jia and I went home to sleep, is Liu Fang up yet?”

“Not yet,” I looked back at Liu Fang: “Are you guys coming over for lunch?”

“Tell me more, I’m not up yet either, I’m lying in bed watching TV, so I’ll call back at noon to get in touch.”

I hung up the phone, climbed into bed and turned on the TV, on the screen was the familiar Tiananmen Square, there is a familiar face standing on the red flag car, is waving to the neat and majestic columns and columns of squadrons, the sky is clear and vast, the flags are waving, the flowers from the brocade, I was deeply attracted by the spectacular picture, today is the fiftieth anniversary of the big celebration, as a native of the mainland, I am doubly proud of the youth.

“Hello comrades!” “Good day, sir!” The cheers and salutes on TV were so neat and tidy that I suddenly remembered a joke told to me by a friend from the embassy when I was abroad, also about a military parade. The joke was about Yang Shangkun waving to the soldiers in his car during a military parade one year: “Greetings, comrades!” The soldiers, who had been trained to respond to the chief’s words, shouted in unison, “Good day, chief!” Yang Shangkun was so pleased that he said to the driver, “Look, our soldiers are really something.” Not realizing that the microphone had been left open, the words were transmitted, and when the soldiers heard the chief’s words, they all replied energetically, “Chief… Chief… Bravo… Bravo!”

Liu Fang also woke up, we both watched the National Day ceremony in bed for more than an hour before getting up and washing his face, Li He came to a phone call, I said to her very politely at noon do not have to come over to stay with us, we go out to go around by ourselves, so that she can rest assured to watch the store, she said she came over in the evening, I suddenly remembered that the NIKE sports pants, so that she will help me to buy them to bring it over.

Liu Fang and I walked to the street, the weather is very good, slightly hot, the road crowded, we live in the Martyrs’ Park neighborhood, today does not charge admission fees, there are many people help the old and young to play here, to be honest, the road of the townspeople dressed in plain and calm, look earthy, and I do not know every night to eat and drink, Yan dance Yingge those fashionable men and women in the end is not their children.

After circling around, the two of us couldn’t find a suitable place to eat, so we simply went back to Zhongtian, where the restaurant on the first floor was wrapped up by a wedding reception, and we looked around for half a day, unable to pretend to be members of the family to blend in.

I looked at the main desk and the girl wasn’t there.

We found a window seat in the small restaurant on the third floor, the sun shines in from the window, warm and comfortable, we ordered a few small dishes, and then called Suya and Leng Jia, Suya is not working a family, Leng Jia is in the television station of the National Day holiday seven days, they are free, may be because of downstairs with the seat of the edge of the package, the order of the food on the very slow, the two of us are not in a hurry, and slowly sipping chrysanthemum tea, have a ride! I’m not in a hurry, we are slowly sipping chrysanthemum tea and chatting with each other.

After a while, Suya appeared at the elevator door with her bag on her back, and when she saw us, she came over to us, humming a little song: “Seeing the back is a crime, seeing the front is a masturbation…”

“Pedal, ah, give me the pedal.” Liu Fang immediately responded with a lewd pose in phase.

I laughed at the two of them, feeling a chess match.

The food in the hotel wasn’t as authentic as it was outside, and it wasn’t as spicy, and Liu Fang and I ate it smoothly, and Suya asked for more chili for herself.

“Where’s old Kuang?” Sua asked me.

“I told her to let her rest assured to watch the store, we go around on the line, so familiar, there is no need to be courteous, these days the general units are on vacation, delayed business is not good,” I secretly turned the idea in my heart, said casually: “We are out of the heart anyway, play what does not matter, there is no need to bother others too much, right? It doesn’t matter what we do, we don’t need to bother others, right? Li He’s boyfriend is not sometimes in her place to live, so I simply in the hotel room, so as not to trouble.”

In my mind, I thought that Suya and Li He were often together, so I should know all the general things, as long as she didn’t express surprise at my words, it meant that Li He did have a boyfriend, otherwise she would definitely ask me what was going on.

Sure enough, Suya did not say anything, just a slight nod, I have a number in my heart, secretly sneer, after a while, we all finished eating, drinking tea and waiting for Leng Jia to come over, the weather heated up, I want some ice, put it in the tea, Liu Fang on the side of the smoke, Suya also lit a, we casually chat about some national events.

“Soa, is Li Ho’s boyfriend treating her well?” I asked naturally as we chatted, Suya certainly wasn’t stupid, but I think she had the most straightforward personality out of all these people, willing to tell the truth.

Suya hesitated for a moment, looked at me, see me very relaxed look, think there is nothing, said: “okay, in fact, can not be counted as a boyfriend, that store is not that man to help her get it.”

“That’s good, I’ve been trying to persuade her to find a better one,” I smiled indifferently, “Doesn’t that guy live at her place every day?”

“No, that person has a family of her own, right, so what do you care! You can’t marry her.” Suya paused, still feeling a bit uneasy: “You can’t say I told you this.”

“Definitely not.” I seriously made a guarantee, many thoughts in my heart popped up all at once, this Li He, I told her long ago that there is more friendship than male and female love between us, and also advised her to find a boyfriend early, so I’m not angry that she has such a thing, just why did she lie to me? I’m a person who doesn’t care about many things, but I hate it when people lie to me, especially when the person I think is the most trustworthy in my heart lies to me, no matter what the purpose is, I have a feeling of being betrayed.

Su Ya and Liu Fang do not know what I think in my heart at all, the three of us cheekily discuss where to play, Leng Jia again after a while to come, we settled the bill, and finally decided to go to Hunan University, climbing Yuelu Mountain.

Outside the weather is really good, the sun is warm and brilliant, the four of us took a car in the direction of the west of the river to go, passing the Xiangjiang River Bridge when the wind blew, in front of the gully opened up, “independent of the cold autumn, the Xiangjiang River to the north, the Orange Island head.”

When I think of a few lines from his old man’s poem, I feel my heart open up a lot.

The car wound its way down the mountain road, and by the time we got near Hunan University, pedestrians began to line both sides of the road, so we got out of the car in front of the Yuelu Academy and bought tickets to enter.

Yuelu Academy is a famous school for hundreds of years, it is said that Zhu Xi, that hypocrite, used to lecture here in the Song Dynasty. As soon as I entered, I saw Confucianism’s key words written on the wall… “loyalty, filial piety, propriety, righteousness, honesty, and integrity”. There were many tourists, and a few tour guides were telling stories, but Leng Jia and I didn’t talk much along the way. I don’t remember much, I regret a little. The three of them on the poetry, calligraphy and painting and cultural relics and monuments is not much interest at all, walked a few steps on the not go, Liu Fang and Leng Jia sat on the chair in the promenade to chat, Su Ya ran to the souvenir store to go shopping, I turned around a big circle by myself, very carefully pottered once again, or the door of the couplet is quite indignation, “but Chu has the ability, in the Sheng “The world’s heroes are underestimated.

Turned through the compound, I turned from the side door to the left, is a patriotic picture exhibition, today put here to also very timely, I looked over one by one, I feel ashamed, their own splendor, do not want to serve the country, but all day long trapped in the personal fame and fortune in the mind, or else greedy for wine and sex, compared to these national heroes, is really no place for self-consciousness, but also want to think about the ancient rivers and mountains, the wind is always blown by the rain and the wind to go, and today the Academy Still in, the personnel is not, according to the maple leaves, light autumn wind, many things, there is no need to be too serious.

Walked back to the main courtyard, looked up and saw Liu Fang and Leng Jia is still sitting there chatting lively, the heart is a little uncomfortable, but also feel puzzled, Su Ya suddenly ran over, said that the house over there in the performance of the chimes and ancient music, pulling us to see. The house is cool and quiet, there are a few rows of seats in the back, sparsely seated some people, in front of the stage hanging a set of chimes, there are a few ancient musical instruments, a few men and women in ancient costumes on the stage posing, two ladies on the stage is holding a list of guests to ask for a point of the repertoire, a young lady came to me in front of the list, I looked at the list, not many repertoire, the young lady pointed out the “Moonlit Night on the Spring River” to recommend to me, I thought of today’s day, ordered I remembered the day and ordered the song “Full River Red”.

“Han Jiang, you’re quite poetic, let’s hear one.” We came out after listening to the chimes, and Leng Jia joked with me.

I looked at her face under the sunlight some delicate red, casually recited: “three Xiang four water a vein through, frosty sky red leaves ancient and modern. The moon at the top of Yuelu Mountain is known to have shone on the winds of the southern sea.”

Suya led the applause and added, “Unfortunately, this kind of learning is not useful now, everyone is thinking about how to make money.”

“That’s right,” I nodded my head in agreement: “Poetry and song can be used to nourish the mind, but not to make things happen.”

Walking out of the Yuelu Academy, Liu Fang and Leng Jia were still joking, Su Ya and I walked behind, she probably felt that I was a bit dull today, not like the usual light-hearted jokes, so she asked me what was wrong.

“Nothing much,” I laughed, “just a little respect for the date and the place.”

“Do you like Leng Jia a little bit?” Sua asked me single-handedly.

“Yeah, how do you know?” I admitted decisively that Sua was the type of person I could consider a friend, and I would like to hear her opinion, which might be more objective as a bystander.

“Women are always more sensitive to this kind of thing,” Suya was satisfied with my trust in her and felt smug about her accurate judgment, “but I don’t think you have much hope, she seems to be more interested in that one.” She nudged Liu Fang, who was walking beside Leng Jia.

“Could it be because of Li Ho?” I asked from the bottom of my heart, “All knowing my original relationship with Li Ho, and her and Li Ho being so good.”

“That’s possible.” Sua said after some thought.

“In fact, things between Li Ho and I ended a long time ago,” I felt that I had to make this clear, or else the nature of the matter would change: “We haven’t seen each other a few times since we separated four years ago, and there was a lot of friendship between us, and our love for each other is long gone… you can see that… “

“None of my business,” Suya looked at me and laughed: “You should talk to Leng Jia about this.”

“Then, do you think that it’s a bit not so good if I’m looking for Leng Jia now, since I was in that kind of relationship with Li He?” I tentatively asked Suya.

“I don’t know,” Sua paused and added, “but I don’t think it’s a big deal, just make it clear that friends don’t get upset with each other.”

“I think so too,” I was encouraged and humbly agreed with Sua, “Li He has his own boyfriend now.”

We follow the mountain road, skidding up the hill, the trees on both sides are not high, the green of the grass is also light, turned a corner, Liu Fang went to the toilet, the three of us stood under the tree and waited for him, Su Ya ran to the side of the ground stalls to look at those knick-knacks, I looked at Leng Jia, she was bored with picking the leaves on the branches of the tree, raising her hands to show her plump breasts, Leng Jia picking off the leaves, turned back to see me looking at her, a little bit of Embarrassed, I did not expect to tell jokes in front of many people so reckless people, will also have this kind of appearance, I feel tickled in my heart.

“Leng Jia, what were you talking to Liu Fang about?” I asked her with a smile on my face. With this kind of expression, no one can tell what’s going on in your mind, whether it’s a joke or serious… in and out.

“It’s still the same thing you said last night about how great and capable you are.” Leng Jia teased me.

I laughed awkwardly, thinking she was taking it too far.

“Yesterday we went to Hedong to play, the day before yesterday we just arrived in Changsha,” I silently counted the days, and naturally asked: “You haven’t been home for a few days, right? Your mom and dad don’t care about you.”

“No ah, I stayed at home the day before yesterday,” Leng Jia said: “What is there to care, are so big.”

“How big?” I teased her nastily.

“It’s bigger than you anyway.” In this regard, the girls of Changsha are battle-hardened and do not flinch.

Liu Fang came out of the restroom, Su Ya also ran back, bought two small clay figures to Liu Fang and I. I know that in her heart she cares the most about other people’s attitude towards her, so she received it very seriously. We wanted to climb to the Ai Evening Pavilion, but the weather was too hot, so when we reached the Mid-level Pavilion, we felt tired and found a few seats to rest. Liu Fang went to the upper store to buy some water, and then ran back to the store, and then Leng Jia said that she wanted to tell us a story about “hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee.

“Said there are two rich women, often to the bar to call ducks, once met two midgets, want to taste fresh, they brought back to the hotel opened two rooms, this side of a rich woman and midgets on the bed, found that he is not only very short, and a moment on the end, very dissatisfied; hear the next door to the two people’s situation is completely different, only to listen to the midgets, ‘hey, hey, hey’ was actually engaged in a night, envious, The next day, two rich women exchanged experiences, this one said: ‘Hey, I can’t do this, it’s over in a minute, or you’re good at that, you’ve been having sex all night.’ Another rich woman said: ‘What ah, he shook the night, but also did not climb into bed.'”

Liu Fang also remembered a joke: “There is a family gave birth to a child, very strange, born to talk, first shouted ‘mom’, the results of her mother immediately died, and then shouted ‘grandma’, grandma also died, the child looked back and saw his father, his father rushed to cover his mouth, too late, only to hear the child shouted ‘dad’, the results of his father is fine. The child looked back and saw his father, his father was terrified, rushed to cover his mouth, it was too late, only to hear the child shouted ‘Dad’, the result was that his father was fine. After a while the news came from outside that the old king next door had suddenly died.”

This joke is very old, and many people have heard it, but it’s really funny, and we all had a good time, and Sua thought for a while, and told one, too.

“There is a stupid son, the family gave him a daughter-in-law, his mother was afraid that he would not get, so she told him: ‘night into the bridal chamber, as long as you take your hardest place to touch your wife’s peeing place can.’ As a result, the next day out, the silly son’s head is full of big bags, his mother quickly asked what happened, the silly son cried: ‘you did not let me take the hardest place to touch her pee place? My hardest is the head, touched the toilet that she used to urinate overnight, and it was like this.'”

When they speak, I listened quietly next to the smile, I like to listen to this kind of joke, but I do not know how to speak, Suya spoke, forced me to speak, I thought about it, remembered a joke I heard in Guangzhou, said to them.

“Bald Li into a go back to the United States, to the capitalist society would like to get a foreign girl for national glory, so took just issued a $20 subsidy to the street to find, the results of the line price is to $25, he bargained with the boss, the boss said, that’s fine, that’s fine, please go upstairs to the left of the room, he went in to take a look at, only an ostrich. He thought, “Damn, this boss cheated me.” He had no choice but to pay the money, so he had a little fun with the ostrich. Later, the group’s subsidies rose to $ 25, bald Li into the happy, took the money and go, did not expect the line price has risen, to $ 30, had to haggle with the boss, the boss said that well that well, please go upstairs to the right of the room, a went in and found a group of people around the look of a man and a woman to engage in, Li can not help but scolded: ‘Damn this boss and pit me, spend money can only Seeing people screwing.’ Next to a person said: ‘This also depends on luck, so already good, last time I came, only see a bald in the ostrich.'”

We made a fuss for a while, went down the hill, I looked back, can not see the Ai Wan Pavilion, remembered the former “stop and love the maple forest evening, frost leaves red in February flowers” mood, looking back at the Chu sky vast, thousands of miles of smoke in front of the eyes, let a person between the chest and the gullies suddenly born, and the Qinhuai moon and the South China Sea of the pale twilight, a different kind of different.

On the way down, Liu Fang and Suya were playing around in front of them, and Suya’s yellow tune kept coming out: “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, seven little people with seven little sticks…”

Leng Jia and I couldn’t help but laugh out loud, Leng Jia pulled me and said, “Do you know why the prince divorced Snow White later?”

“Why?”

“Because on their wedding night, the prince found seven small holes and one large hole in Snow White’s hymen.”

“Seven little holes I get, what’s with the one big one?” I played dumb.

“Snow White lived in the forest with the Seven Dwarfs and Pinocchio, and when she had nothing to do, she called Pinocchio over: ‘Pinocchio, come here, be good, tell the truth, tell a lie, tell the truth, tell a lie, tell a lie,…'” Leng Jia laughed and bent over as she modeled Pinocchio’s nose as it lengthened and shortened.

I also can not help but smile, Leng Jia youthful and playful appearance and vulgar language to form a strong contrast, people are very easy to produce impulses, immovable such as me, but also feel a little can not stand.

To the foot of the mountain, waiting for the car back to Changsha city is a lot of people, we waited for a while in the shade of a tree, there is no empty cab, I simply walked to the front of a few intersections, hit a car, and came back to pick up them, in the car we discuss where to go, Leng Jia and Su Ya said that there are places to skate on real ice and archery, I think it does not matter, what sports I have played, Liu Fang think it’s too hot, and would like to go back to the hotel to rest for a while.

We returned to the hotel, Liu Fang to take a shower, I asked them what fun places in the suburbs, Leng Jia said to go to Shaoshan, see his old man’s former residence, but just no car, inconvenient. So it turned out the yellow pages of the phone book, looking for a rental car company’s phone, I suddenly remembered Tan Jianjun’s car, called him, he is not in Changsha, went to Yiyang home, and said a lot of polite words.

Leng Jia check the phone number of the car rental company, call the past, the procedures are very troublesome, to account book, identity card, driver’s license, deposit guarantee what, I swept up, and I think my two driver’s license is suspended in Shenzhen, another is Beijing to do the annual inspection, driving without a license in Shenzhen can be if there is something here is really not good to do, and will not be done.

Liu Fang came out and we started playing cards, tractors, Changsha’s rules are strange, 7 is the usual master, playing from 9. Suya and I were in a group, our hands were OK, when we got to Q, they were still playing 9.

Played a while, the sky is dark again, outside the baking, as if there is a Fourth of July fireworks in the release. Li He came to help me buy the pants, I know that the price of the pants is 400 yuan, took a thousand dollars to her, Li He generously received, I have never seen her receive money is not generous, I secretly think.

Li Huo sat beside me to watch us play cards, we began to lose, I was a little distracted, the more I played the more spiritless, so I pretended to go to the toilet, let Li Huo play for me, she is still giddy, a little did not notice, is it worth it to get a little bit of money to be so happy?

I came out of the restroom, lit a cigarette, and sat behind Suya to watch her play cards, instead of sitting next to Li He, Leng Jia glanced at me and didn’t say anything, and I looked at these people in the room, all of whom had been there before.

Li He and Suya work well together, two won, we pack up while discussing what to eat, Suya and Leng Jia to the restroom to make up, I stood at the window, thought, think things have come to this point, there is no point, called Li He to the side, and gently asked her:: “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

“How much did I just get you?”

“I didn’t count.” Lihao whispered back.

“It’s like a thousand, you keep five hundred, and I’ll take that five hundred, and I’ll treat them to a nice meal today.”

“I’ll just check out later.” Li Ho didn’t move.

“No, I’ll settle it, you go ahead.” I was a little impatient.

Li He did not say anything, bring the bag over, take out the money and hand it to me, I counted out five hundred yuan to her, put the rest in the pocket, in Changsha, a few people a full meal over but three hundred yuan.

Suya and Leng Jia came out, we discussed to eat seafood, go to a seafood stall in Wujialing, out of the door, Suya they ran to press the elevator, Li He and I walked at the end, I took the key of the IC card, take the room door, turn and ask Li He: “Do you have a boyfriend?”

“No.” Li Ho looked me squarely in the eyes with a natural expression : “What’s wrong?”

I sneered a few times in my mind and didn’t say anything.

The road is crowded with people, the car is jammed, we walked to the May 1 intersection, waited for a long time, but did not wait for an empty cab, the street can light up the lights have been lit, people pouring out, or to eat or play, to enjoy the peace and prosperity.

We finally waited for a dilapidated empty Xiali, promised the driver more than ten dollars, five people have squeezed in, did not open a few steps, dead fire, how can not hit, and finally Liu Fang got off the car and pushed a few times, finally hit, the driver did not dare to stop, the car slowly slipped forward, Liu Fang pulled open the door and jumped on the car, drove a section of the car blocked together, a stop and stalled, the weather is hot and noisy, we are a little irritated, Liu Fang And go down to push, I did not move, the mood is a little bad, Liu Fang, after all, over thirty years old, in front of people is still very facetious, I think this I am not as good as him.

“If the engine goes out one more time, we won’t pay.” Liu Fang jumped into the car and said to the driver.

Good thing the car is quite competitive, the way did not stall again, I called my mother in the car, the holidays, she is playing mahjong with my sister and other relatives, I said if you lose, take a white note to find me reimbursement.

hung up the phone, I feel quieter, all the way we did not talk much, a lot of police on the road to direct traffic, our car stops and starts, to the five Ling when it has been almost nine o’clock, the seafood stalls have been feint, we went in when the waiter is cleaning, but the attitude of the service there is not bad, did not turn us away, the kitchen fire is still not closed, we have to be a The kitchen fire was still on, so we asked for a single room and ordered some food.

A little annoyed in my heart, I started to spell beer with Suya, I know that she also had a bad year, and her heart was stuffy with many things, and Liu Fang didn’t talk much, the atmosphere was a little strange, “What’s wrong?” Leng Jia couldn’t help but ask me.

“He said I lied to him.” Before I could say anything, Li Ho said from the side.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” I asked Li Ho with a smile.

“No.” Li Ho replied calmly.

Suya and Leng Jia looked at each other in disbelief as I kept ignoring Li He and joking with Liu Fang and the three of them.

After dinner out, they want to go to the bathroom, Liu Fang and I wait for them at the door of the open space, the lights in the distance, I’m a little drunk, practicing Mike Jackson’s rock steps. There were countless people waiting for the bus at Wujialing Square. We waited for half an hour and there were no empty cabs. A bus pulled up, and with a wave of Suya’s hand, we swarmed in, one for each of us. Is proud of the time, the conductor told us that this car to the west of the river, not to Wuyi Square, we are frustrated to jump out of the car, and waited for a while, intercepted a cab, but in any case do not agree with the five of us crowded, and more money can not be, simply let the Liu Fang, Leng Jia, Su Ya, the three of them first, about to see in Zhongshan Road.

Li Huo and I continued to wait there, well it wasn’t too cold and I didn’t care to wait a little longer, Li Huo had been standing beside me silently, I thought for a while and decided to push my luck and talk to her.

“Li Huo, in fact, you also know that over the years, the two of us haven’t seen each other a few times, the love between a man and a woman has long since faded, and it’s more of a feeling between friends.” I looked at her eyes and said sincerely.

“I know.” She replied softly.

“I’ve always felt that you’ve been good to me, I’ve told you about all the girlfriends I’ve had in the past few years, and I’ve told you about anything I’ve been unhappy about, and I know that I can’t give you anything, not marriage, not fame, not money, so I’d also suggest that you look for a man who’s good to you sooner rather than later, and that I wouldn’t care about that, I’d only be happy for you, and think about you, except that you shouldn’t hide it from me. “

“I understand what you’re saying, but I really don’t have a boyfriend.” Li Ho looked at me and said calmly.

I just felt a burst of anger burning up from the bottom of my heart, to such an extent that you still want to lie to me, in the end, what kind of heart do you have?

“And where did you get the tens of thousands of dollars to open that little store?” I laughed instead of being angry.

“I told you, it’s from home.”

“The night I came, you knew I was coming, so how could you turn off the phone? Leng Jia and her boyfriend in Guangdong have long since blown it, so how could she be staying at your place?”

“You call me so late, I thought you do not come, cold Jia in Changsha and a boyfriend ah, is also a very good boy, she is not good and home to say, live in my place.” Li He in vain not for me to die, this woman’s heart, but also really is considered hard as iron.

I finally waited for a car. I pulled open the door and sat in the front. There were fewer cars on the road, and the smog was fading away. The stereo in the car was playing Ren Xianqi’s “Sad Pacific Ocean”, “The boat I’m waiting for hasn’t come yet… Is the one I love still here?… One wave hasn’t yet stopped, but another wave has already passed… A deep sadness at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean…” The lyrics of the song were very sad, and it was as if the tides had turned. My anger gradually subsided, and I felt a sense of resignation that the song had ended. I knew my character, and when I was furious, I still had a glimmer of hope that I could salvage the situation, but once I had calmed down completely, it was all over, and I realized that I had been callous and unfeeling.

Li He and I got off the car in Zhongshan Road, into a small bar called “Tucker’s Castle” decorated with ancient , walked to the second floor, I saw Liu Fang and the three of them sitting on the stools in front of the bar, there is a small stage in the bar, a ballad singer is singing, Leng Jia side of the two empty stools.

Li He walked over and sat next to Leng Jia, I suddenly had an inexplicable feeling of disgust in my heart, I turned around and went to the restroom, which was next door, I went downstairs, turned around on the street, and walked into a video game parlor, which was crowded with people, all of them fourteen or fifteen year olds, lavishly wasting their time and money in front of the game machines.

I went back to Tucker’s Castle, there were a lot of people sitting on some of the tables and seats inside, Leng Jia and the others were sitting in a row in front of the bar, I walked over and didn’t sit next to Li Ho, there was still an empty stool on Suya’s side, so I squeezed down next to her, probably because of the plain clothes I was wearing and the weird actions, a lot of people turned their heads to look at me.

“Where did it go?” Sua asked me.

“Restroom.” I took Suya’s beer affectionately and took a sip.

“What the fuck are you sitting here for? Sit over there.” Sua whispered to me.

I ignored her, ordered myself a Sun Beer, and started looking around to see if there were any pretty girls to look at, but no one paid any attention to me. I sat quietly for a while, listening to the singer play the guitar and sing the song I knew best: “Cinderella”.

“How did I fall in love with you” I was asking myself

There’s a sadness in your eyes that I can’t escape

You’re not beautiful, but you’re cute as hell.

Oh, Cinderella, my Cinderella.

I always break your heart. I’m always cruel.

I don’t want you to take it seriously. It’s a dream you’ll wake up from.

You’re so beautiful, and you’re so cute.

Cinderella, my Cinderella…”

That singer sings ordinary, but this song has deeply touched me, years ago, I have been like this, in a bar to another person pouring out the voice of his heart, at that time I was as simple and brilliant as the sunshine, a glimpse, and a long time in the years time flies, but can no longer remember how the romance and innocence is disappearing, the excitement and the passion is how to retreat, since when we make love just because of the need, since when we no longer believe in any love began to play the game of life. Since when do we make love just because we need to, since when do we no longer believe in any love and start to play life? Under the dark moonlight, who can say that the four years of acquaintance of the old friends, is how in the graduation of many years after a banquet in a cup of wine, the heartfelt parting, and how in the memory of the wheel of the years gradually fuzzy with the wind, the plot of life, as you wish, I finally learned to cheat and fall, at this time after all the hijacking of our smiles are so similar, how can we say that in the end, who is who is negative who?

Liu Fang, Leng Jia and Li He were chatting, Su Ya was silent, and I sipped my wine faintly, deeply feeling that life is impermanent and the feast will be broken up.

“It was you who made me give my true love, but then you left my side…” The singer finished his song, said thank you and left, and a few old songs played softly in the bar, making people feel nostalgic.

I for Changsha, always a guest, when I am in a foreign country, I never miss this city, in my life, the most beautiful section is not here, romance and reality in time and space shuttle back and forth, in fact, the good and the evil is often only in the thought, sometimes I don’t know what kind of a person I am in the end.

Years like a knife, carefully carved you and me, the river of time is long and far-reaching, I crossed from the crowd, fate let me make a life and death friendship at the time of youth, and let us after graduation from different sides of the liver and guts, and embarked on the community after the North and South, people in the spring and autumn in the floating and sinking, when the old days of the engraved in the heart of the story has become a story for people to commemorate, you can ask me to go to how the persistent and free, I am still busy, from here to there, in all levels of society, experience and struggle, just the desire to survive has long been cocooned in the heart, so that people instinctively numb and cold. I am still busy, from here to there, in all levels of society to experience the struggle, but the desire to survive has long been in the heart of the cocoon, so that people instinctively numb and cold.

“I like the feeling of depravity.”

“What?” Sua asked, turning back to me.

“I said, I like the feeling of depravity.” I yelled into her ear.

“Do you think you’re degenerate?”

“I don’t know,” I said seriously, “sometimes they say I’m like an angel.”

“Fuck you.” Sua picked up the bottle of wine and clinked it with me, there wasn’t much left in the bottle, we both looked at each other and laughed as we drank it down.

There was a table next door with a boy and a girl, and the girl had a birthday, and the boy had bought a cake and presents and was lighting the candles that were stuck in the cake, and while the girl was blowing out the candles, a few of us sang Happy Birthday.

That girl was so happy that she couldn’t speak, that little boy was very understanding, brought us cakes, quite delicious, to be honest, I don’t envy them, I know that they are bound to go through this sweet time, and then go their own ways, and then continue to fall in love and go to bed with different people separately, until they consume their innocent feelings, before they are considered to be grown up, and they know how to come to this kind of place to play at such a young age! In the future will certainly be this set of journey, only those who have never played and never moved to true love, will use their lives to adhere to chastity, this kind of people either do not have the conditions, or their own ugly stupid, I hate to be one of these two kinds of people.

“Sua, why aren’t you married yet? Don’t wait for me, I’m hopeless.” I got drunk and started talking nonsense to Suya.

“Damn, I’m not interested in men now, none of them are good.” Suya seemed to be drunk as well, and actually talked to me in a serious way.

“Isn’t Shen Xiangdong treating you quite well?”

“He is too small,” Suya drank a mouthful of wine: “In fact, I used to have a boyfriend, at that time in the National Defense University of Science and Technology, the family environment is also quite good, his father seems to be the province of a director of what he always wears a military uniform, quite handsome, at that time, I still open a cafe, but also a little money, all day long! Play together.”

“Then he graduated, opened his own company, have some money, play outside, I love him very much, he find other girls I do not care, as long as he is still with me on the line. Then later he picked up Changsha a quite famous girl, very beautiful, but people are wrapped up by a quite powerful man, that man knows, has been trying to find an opportunity to clean him up.”

Sua spoke slowly, expressionless, and I felt so much more awake.

“He was because of business, often chartered to run down, driving that driver drug use, their own money all sucked no, little by little to drag him down, first to give him the kind of smoke or something, and so he is a bit addicted, often sell some to him, earn some money themselves also smoke. Once he and the girl is in the hotel, was arrested by the public security, first said he was on drugs, and then forced him to admit to prostitution, in fact, is the people in the whole him.”

“He was locked up in the drug rehabilitation center in those months, I went to see him every day, the tens of thousands of dollars earned at that time were all spent on saving him, and then, fortunately, I and the cadres of the correctional officers are particularly familiar with the care of him, and did not suffer much. Those fucking correctional officers were also quite funny. Once I went to the office, I heard a cadre scolding another cadre: ‘I told you not to let those female prisoners work in the fields, and look, after they left, the cucumbers in the fields are all gone.'”

Sua said and laughed and I couldn’t help but laugh too.

“It’s the end of your life if you get into drugs,” I said. “Have you gotten over it?”

“Quit, he actually only sucked a month, not very strong,” Suya lit a cigarette: “After he came out, he went to the field, we also broke up, a few years ago, and then heard that he came back to Changsha, but also did not contact.”

“If he really quit, then the person who fixed him up didn’t harm him, but saved him,” I said objectively, “but I’ve heard that as soon as you get hooked on a drug, you’ve never heard of one that you can really quit.”

“He just graduated, is the best time for both of us, he engaged in the company’s first business or I entrusted Zheng Fei to help him get it done, a three million renovation project, then Zheng Fei, they engage in modeling team, so the old men invited to come out to play with them to drink, dance, Zheng Fei to their team of all the girls called, the old man how to see so much beautiful women, and look quite high, the relationship was immediately fixed. The old men had never seen so many pretty girls, and they were all quite tall, so the relationship was fixed in a flash.”

Suya skillfully exhaled a smoke ring and said, “That’s why I don’t really blame Zheng Fei now, even though the two of us were later separated because of our partnership in the café, I still remember what she did to help me.”

“What happened with you and Zheng Fei?” I asked.

“It’s nothing, people don’t have the right personality for business, I guess, too lazy to talk about these things, drink drink drink.” Suya picked up the bottle of wine and bumped it with me.

I sat quietly for a while, thinking about Suya, she is a person personality is relatively straight, from a cold, not much reading, in fact, many girls do not read much is just, as long as they do not care, as long as they are beautiful and rich on the line, but she cares quite a lot, like to be with cultured people, and in the heart of the worry that others look down on her, living the Changsha girls indulge in the life of the heart, but has been open to look at it, it is no wonder that it is not good. No wonder it is not good, fortunately, her character is more cheerful and outgoing, cheek to cheek on the past.

I look at these years has not been good Li He, in Guangzhou and boyfriend living together for a few years did not become popular and returned to Changsha Leng Jia, thirty-one years old and still have no girlfriend Liu Fang, I think it is really “everyone a difficult to read the scripture”, the streets of those who are dressed in a dashing, young and beautiful, eat, drink and enjoy the people, I think there must be their own difficulties.

And sat for a while, we settled the bill out, the street lights, many big money small money in the city to enjoy the prosperity of the city, with some unknown identity of the lady to eat a snack, I also feel a little hungry, suddenly remembered that I had eaten here before the spicy fried snails, the taste is greatly good, and asked Leng Jia there is no more.

“There is, it’s not far, we can just walk over and eat.” Leng Jia seems to be extraordinarily tolerant of me tonight, I’m a little embarrassed.

Across the street there is a barbecue lamb kebab stall, Liu Fang and Li He went over to buy lamb kebabs to eat, I, Leng Jia, Su Ya also followed, the smoke rolled, the lamb kebabs do not look too clean, I suddenly lost my appetite, so I sat far away from the chair of the other stall to watch them eat, think gluttony is worthy of the first of the seven deadly sins.

I waited for a while, feel a little hot, take off the shirt, bare bladder sitting in a daze, muddy without the usual elegant look, feel like a civil servant, I sat in the stall of the boss see I do not buy anything, came over to pat me on the shoulder, to collect the chair, I honestly handed it over.

We walked through a few streets, sat down in a stall selling snacks, asked for a few plates of snails, I was the only one who ordered a beer, I ate with gusto, wiped my hands on the napkins used five packets, the street lamps flicker, flickering, such as you and I, the affairs of the heart, not to be known.

We took a taxi back to the hotel, I took a bed sheet and a pillow, lay down on the floor and fell asleep, in a daze, I heard Leng Jia picking up a phone call, and when I woke up in the early hours of the morning to go to the bathroom, I found that only Sua was lying asleep on the bed and that the three people were gone.

I mechanically walked back to the sheets and fell asleep on the floor.